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Lesson learned

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So, I just returned from SP & posted some of my adventures.  I didn’t name any of the sex-providers, but dropped some clues if they were advertising online as garotos, or even more vague descriptions if they worked in the sauna.  I also offered to answer some questions via private message to help other members plan their trip to SP.  
So, after answering multiple questions (to the point of getting annoying) for one member here specifically - I get a text from a garoto that this person is WhatsApp “interviewing” him with a bunch of ridiculous questions, photo requests and insisting on bareback sex. And using my information saying that we’re friends. Yes, I know who the person is.  I simply pointed this member to the garotos online listing - and within a few hours, the trouble starts.

Based on my interactions with members here - vast majority are mature and don’t abuse the information that we share.  Too bad a few immature people ruin it for the majority.  FWIW - I should have known better and my gut told me this guy was trouble.  Lesson learned.  

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2 hours ago, Slvkguy said:

So, I just returned from SP & posted some of my adventures.  I didn’t name any of the sex-providers, but dropped some clues if they were advertising online as garotos, or even more vague descriptions if they worked in the sauna.  I also offered to answer some questions via private message to help other members plan their trip to SP.  
So, after answering multiple questions (to the point of getting annoying) for one member here specifically - I get a text from a garoto that this person is WhatsApp “interviewing” him with a bunch of ridiculous questions, photo requests and insisting on bareback sex. And using my information saying that we’re friends. Yes, I know who the person is.  I simply pointed this member to the garotos online listing - and within a few hours, the trouble starts.

Based on my interactions with members here - vast majority are mature and don’t abuse the information that we share.  Too bad a few immature people ruin it for the majority.  FWIW - I should have known better and my gut told me this guy was trouble.  Lesson learned.  


Yep. I learned that lesson YEARS ago on another board and carried it over to this one. It’s why I keep my information shared about individuals to a minimum. Some posters and clients are really shady characters, others are just a little off their rockers. 

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3 hours ago, SolaceSoul said:

Yep. I learned that lesson YEARS ago on another board and carried it over to this one. It’s why I keep my information shared about individuals to a minimum. Some posters and clients are really shady characters, others are just a little off their rockers. 

Btw - I’ve noticed the same guy asking others for their favorite guys to hire in Santo Domingo, São Paulo & other popular places mentioned here.  The pattern is he’s always “just planning a trip” and fishing for specific information.  When other members ask him for details of those same trips, then the responses are vague & evasive.  The trips probably never happen and this guy gets off on our stories and then starts to harass the sex-worker/garoto or Manny via WhatsApp.  He’s looking for anything to ID exact people and make contact with them.  Pathetic.  

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SG, I humbly submit u and the rest of us consider other or additional lessons:

1. As already has been mentioned, the culprit should be named. 

2. The responsible majority should not suffer for the sins of the minority.

3. All of us should devote 3 mnts of 'profile research" before sharing discreet info.

4. Go with guts & instinct: when in doubt - don't share.

5. To emphasize by repetition: us majority shouldn't be punished.

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I would like to name him & hopefully will be able to do so. But, I don’t want to violate the rules myself in naming him.  I reported the situation to admin & waiting for a response.  

Btw - the garoto sent me screenshots of the conversation with the WhatsApp number & profile pic.  The picture lines up with the way this person has described themselves in some posts. 

I know it’s this person for several reasons -  he asked if he could use my name to make contact & I didn’t answer that question intentionally  - he did it anyway.  He badgered the garoto the same way he badgered me with a bunch of stupid questions - and it was the same questions.  All about condom use and if the garoto will fuck him bareback.

For the time being - if you see a person with relatively few posts and always asking for exact names, contact information either in forums or by private message, don’t fall for it like I did.  I felt bad for the garoto - he was great with me, I saw him several times and we left as friends.  Then he was like wtf is the person doing calling me who says he’s your friend and you referred him ?

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1 hour ago, Slvkguy said:

I would like to name him & hopefully will be able to do so. But, I don’t want to violate the rules myself in naming him.  I reported the situation to admin & waiting for a response.  

Btw - the garoto sent me screenshots of the conversation with the WhatsApp number & profile pic.  The picture lines up with the way this person has described themselves in some posts. 

I know it’s this person for several reasons -  he asked if he could use my name to make contact & I didn’t answer that question intentionally  - he did it anyway.  He badgered the garoto the same way he badgered me with a bunch of stupid questions - and it was the same questions.  All about condom use and if the garoto will fuck him bareback.

For the time being - if you see a person with relatively few posts and always asking for exact names, contact information either in forums or by private message, don’t fall for it like I did.  I felt bad for the garoto - he was great with me, I saw him several times and we left as friends.  Then he was like wtf is the person doing calling me who says he’s your friend and you referred him ?

I have built my relationships of trust with locals over years of regular visits and stays in several different countries. I don’t jeopardize those relationships just for the sake of sharing specific information with people I do not know and trust. I have gotten many requests here (in public and in private), and if I feel they are too invasive or they feel like a fishing expedition, I just ignore them. 

I really don’t care to be the Most Popular On Message Boards. I’d rather remain liked, trusted and well-respected by the locals. 

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I concur with your priorities Solace, but I urge u to consider an aditional factor: the provider's priorities. 

Whenever I part ways on amicable terms, I ask him whether he'd like referrals from me, and I act accordingly. I guesstimate that circa half of them do. 

Good for everyone involved (-:

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I didn’t post anything to be “popular” - I thought it was helpful to share basic information for other members to have up to date information and assist in trip planning.  I haven’t been a longtime member here & the recent SP trip was my first time I was posting as the trip happened.  

I’ve read many public & restricted member posts on these forums and have seen lots of information posted with exact sex-worker names, contact information, etc.  Many times these posts have been by long time prolific posters.  So, I thought I was being more than discreet in not naming names or other identifying information.  

This particular person that scammed me didn’t get weird until the 3rd or 4th private message. And it was too late at that point.

 Little did I know that there are some unwell people that have access here & it would turn into a harassment issue - like I said, lesson learned.

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2 hours ago, Slvkguy said:

I would like to name him & hopefully will be able to do so. But, I don’t want to violate the rules myself in naming him.  I reported the situation to admin & waiting for a response. 

You reported and requested a conversation be removed. I did that for you.

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7 minutes ago, TotallyOz said:

You reported and requested a conversation be removed. I did that for you.

Thank you - I appreciate that.  He should be banned IMO.  There’s a clear pattern if you look at his profile 

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Wooow, I am shocked by what I read!!

Over the years this forum and its members provided me a lot of info on several places I like to visit for my private adventures. I have even made friends here with forum members who I've met in real life. Sharing stories. Sharing adventures. Having a great time. @Slvkguy: it's horrible that your enthusiasm and sharing of stories and knowlage is misused by this total dipshit. Keep sharing sories! I'll do the same. 

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41 minutes ago, numazu said:

This is a big reason why I don't post my trip reports any more. While a tiny minority, there are super creeps out there that make it not worth it and ruin the joy I've felt in the past.  It became so bad that I've had to delete my Instagram in the past because of a stalking issue from this site.

As a rule I never pass on any numbers of boys I feature in my trip reports. That is just asking for trouble. And your mileage may vary anyways... Any good fortune I've had may not translate to you, and vice versa.

I’m very sorry this happened to you too & sounds worse than my brief experience.  What a shame that you don’t post anymore - your Brazil posts inspired my recent trip back to  Brazil/São Paulo.  Thank you for that.  It was so much fun to read your trip reports, loaded with useful information

A couple last points -

1. I did not give the supercreep the garotos phone number. I just directed him to one garotos online ad & he took it from there.  I figured whatever was publicly available online was ok.  Big mistake on my part given the outcome - I won’t even do that any longer.  The supercreep asked for contact information for everyone I mentioned in my posts.

2. I totally understand why this forum requires 10 posts before an user can access invisible/restricted forums - and there’s probably no way to further filter out the supercreeps 

3. I would assume there’s some kind of warning for this kind of thing as the Admin can see everything - and this appears to be a pattern of behavior by certain people that’s fairly easy to identify.  *Especially if the garoto sends the screenshots w pictures & WhatsApp number that matches the profile here.  

Let’s just say he doesn’t fit the profile of the typical members here - although I suppose that could all be fake too.

Some of these online scammers & predators are really good at what they do, unfortunately for us.

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I think that SG has done everyone a big service by recounting his experience & airing the subject of the few creeps out there who screw things up for the rest of us.  Unfortunately, it shows that it's a mistake to be overly trusting in dealing with private messages & personal interactions.  I am not a big fan of 'cancel culture' online or elsewhere but this guy should be banned, IMO.

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4 hours ago, Slvkguy said:

I’m very sorry this happened to you too & sounds worse than my brief experience.  What a shame that you don’t post anymore - your Brazil posts inspired my recent trip back to  Brazil/São Paulo.  Thank you for that.  It was so much fun to read your trip reports, loaded with useful information

A couple last points -

1. I did not give the supercreep the garotos phone number. I just directed him to one garotos online ad & he took it from there.  I figured whatever was publicly available online was ok.  Big mistake on my part given the outcome - I won’t even do that any longer.  The supercreep asked for contact information for everyone I mentioned in my posts.

2. I totally understand why this forum requires 10 posts before an user can access invisible/restricted forums - and there’s probably no way to further filter out the supercreeps 

3. I would assume there’s some kind of warning for this kind of thing as the Admin can see everything - and this appears to be a pattern of behavior by certain people that’s fairly easy to identify.  *Especially if the garoto sends the screenshots w pictures & WhatsApp number that matches the profile here.  

Let’s just say he doesn’t fit the profile of the typical members here - although I suppose that could all be fake too.

Some of these online scammers & predators are really good at what they do, unfortunately for us.

I totally do not understand the motives of these people, why do they have to do this to scare people from sharing stories 

Vivalocal has 500+ garatos, and some other websites, you can go and contact all of them with your xxx questions 

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4 hours ago, babybear2 said:

Vivalocal has 500+ garatos, and some other websites, you can go and contact all of them with your xxx questions 

Unfortunately, many of the garatos on vivalocal have photos from 10 years ago, or are heavily photoshopped.  Some of them took their photos when they were avid gym goers and in top shape some time ago, but have a different body shapes now.  That's why I still prefers sauna's in-person meat market. 

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20 hours ago, 12is12 said:

I concur with your priorities Solace, but I urge u to consider an aditional factor: the provider's priorities. 

Whenever I part ways on amicable terms, I ask him whether he'd like referrals from me, and I act accordingly. I guesstimate that circa half of them do. 

Good for everyone involved (-:

One-on-one, private referrals are fine. However, the overwhelming majority of providers that I have encountered are not interested in having identifying information about them posted on the internet. That means they do not want the information posted on message boards, and would consider that a breach of trust. 

The ones who advertise publicly on sites, do OnlyFans, or make commercial porn are the exceptions to this rule. And even some of those have boundaries — no personal information beyond what they disclose publicly, no face photos if they don’t publicize their face, etc. So, what’s wrong with simply respecting the boundaries of the  providers? 

How about this? Practice The Golden Rule. Would clients like to be exposed, have their photos posted, or discussed in such fine detail that they could be identified, on the internet? If the thought of this gives you the creeps, imagine how it might make a provider (who wishes to maintain a level of discretion) feel. 
 

 

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1 hour ago, 12is12 said:

Solace, you ignored my main point: why not ask them and then follow their wishes?

Sure, ask them if they want “referrals”, but also be very clear with them on how you intend to make those referrals. Don’t be vague. If you tell them, “I’m going to post information about you on an internet message board” and they fully comprehend that said board is publicly accessible, then it’s arguably fair game. 

But let’s be honest here. There have been quite a few posters and lurkers who have NOT done this. There are garotos who work at saunas who rely on relative anonymity, and this trust has been breached by some posters — whether well-intended or nefarious — who didn’t seem to care that these guys have families, local reputations or other jobs to protect. Of course, most readers here are not like that. But it only takes one bad apple.

And for those who can only view things through the lens of self-interest, look at it this way: the less that working guys can trust clients not to “expose” their identities or other personal information, the fewer hot, rare-breed, hard-to-find guys that will work in the field. And that ultimately harms clients seeking the newest, best and brightest talent. 
 

 

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Just now, 12is12 said:

Who said anything about board posting?

Only PMs

I already discussed giving intrusive or private information in Private Messaging with people whom you don’t already know or trust.

BAD IDEA.

I think this is what happened in the OP’s case. I have had unknown posters contact me through PM and ask me leading or invasive questions about particular workers. I don’t take the bait. 

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