Or so wrote Daniel Avila, policy advisor to the US Conference of Bishops, at least until somebody in a bright red hat kicked him really really hard under the table.

In an article titled Some fundamental questions on same-sex attraction, Avila wrote that disruptive imbalances in nature that thwart encoded processes point to supernatural actors who, unlike God, do not have the good of persons at heart.

He continued, Whenever natural causes disturb otherwise typical biological development, leading to the personally unchosen beginnings of same-sex attraction, the ultimate responsibility, on a theological level, is and should be imputed to the evil one, not God.

Bend over, puny human!

You know you want me.

So Satan did us gays a favor while leaving straights to their Idi Amin's and Adolf Hitlers. All those roving straight men just don't know what Satan could have done for them.

There is a reason why they call religious nuts: NUTS!

"Avila is a full-time staffer who advises the USCCB's subcommittee for the Promotion and Defense of Marriage", which runs the Catholic anti-gay marriage initiatives.

Avila did note that, like the Church, he opposes any unjust discrimination against these Devil's spawn. Likewise for any unjust violence.

Beating fags unjustly has no place in Church Doctrine, saith the bishops. Say three Hail Marys, my lads, and God be with you.

There will be a day we will be accepted.

I don't think it matters whether I go to heaven or hell. I will have friends in both places...