Guest fountainhall Posted July 21, 2011 Posted July 21, 2011 A heart-warming story in The Bangkok Post today. Titled “Bias against ladyboys only adds to the hurt,” it looks at the role of family members when they know that one of their sons has feminine traits, and suggests how he should really be treated in comparison to the recent AFP story about the course being run by a Krueng Tai temple to “induct masculinity in ladyboy novices.” Dem Jinakul, a photographer at The Bangkok Post, recognized what was happening to his son, Top, in his teens. He decided that “his child's happiness was more important than his own wish that his son be more manly.” When the school ordered Top to cut his long hair and be like other boys – Top was miserable. He did not want to cut his hair. But he also did not want to make the big gender role jump because he cared for his parents' feelings. "I understood his pain," said Dem. "His mom and I went out to buy him a girl's uniform the next day." Such parents are a rare breed. Most other parents cannot accept that their sons are transsexual. When persuasion fails, some resort to threats, even violence. Some believe psychiatric help can cure. Others, like the parents of Pipop Thanajindawong, 15, believes rigorous religious regimen will do the trick. According to the writer - good intentions can go awry in actual practice when the people involved are mired in gender prejudice. For monks to keep telling ladyboys that they are not normal is not only wrong, it also goes against the teachings. Buddhism does not teach people to hate themselves. It teaches objective acceptance of reality, impermanence, and the false notion of self, heterosexual or homosexual. Focusing on katoey novices is then unnecessary. It also misses the point. Why not focus on paedophile monks who take advantage of novices? Apart from being traumatised for life, many young victims are encouraged to take on the role of girls and thus become ladyboys. For parents, the course at Krueng Tai Temple raises the question of whether it is the right thing to do, to push their children away by forcing them to change their sexual orientation. Dem, my photographer friend, has chosen what it is right for his son. "I chose his happiness. As a result, we remain a close-knit, loving family. For me, that's all that counts." http://www.bangkokpost.com/opinion/opinion/248020/bias-against-ladyboys-only-adds-to-hurt Quote
TotallyOz Posted July 21, 2011 Posted July 21, 2011 It was very sad to read this. I thought Thailand was far more progressive in these matters. I have had so many ladyboy friends and the majority said their parents were OK with them being a ladyboy. Quote
Guest thaiworthy Posted July 21, 2011 Posted July 21, 2011 A heart-warming story in The Bangkok Post today. According to the writer - http://www.bangkokpost.com/opinion/opinion/248020/bias-against-ladyboys-only-adds-to-hurt This story is more heart-warming in the context of the original story, which was published yesterday and written by Jenesara Fugal. I googled some keywords and found this link and others. Janesara Fugal I read this yesterday on another forum and it had me seething. I posted a reply then, which bears repeating: Civilization has taken one giant leap backward. When parents decide the traits of their offspring are unacceptable to them and decide to change him against his will, it constitutes an attitude of intolerance. It is the supreme and ultimate slap in the face against individuality and a crime against the natural progression of human nature. The temple is no better. I am saddened by this belief, and hope it is kept limited to only Kreung Tai Temple. I would be shocked and dismayed about this facet of Buddhism if I were to find it becoming any more widespread than the story appears to suggest. It is completely incongruous with what I have been led to believe about Buddhists and Thailand in general. This story is appalling and absolutely unbelievable. The author of the Bangkok Post story, Sanitsuda Ekachai, whose friend Dem is employed as a photog at the Bangkok Post, surely had read the above yesterday and decided to add Dem's viewpoint as the father of a ladyboy. Lucky for us and Thailand to see a much more refreshing reflection. It also appears to be a more complete, factual and a bit less sensational view than the Fugal report. It is heartwarming by comparison, thank you, Fountainhall. Dem is more like the parent I have come to understand as more fairly representative of the people of Thailand. Pipop's parents, unfortunately still represent the majority. Mebbe my understanding is a false representation, or is it just worrisome parents? The temple seems to have re-clarified its position by stating its mission is one that stresses the nobility and virtue of monkhood, rather than a personality makeover. I just hope those claims are true. Quote
