Not yet in possession of a smartphone, I have little interest in apps. Yet, I noticed in today’s Guardian that until last September you could have downloaded one which predicted the size of someone’s penis! As the blurb announced
 

 

"Any of you ladies out there just start seeing someone new and wondering what the size of there [sic] member is? … All you need to do is find out the man's shoe size and plug it in and … there is no need for disappointment or surprise."

http://www.guardian.co.uk/music/2013/feb/14/chubby-checker-sues-hewlett-packard

Naturally this caused some controversy. Perhaps some men were disappointed that their app size did not measure up to their larger actual size. Or some ladies were disappointed when the opposite turned out to be true.

But now there is even greater controversy over the app’s name. What name would you think appropriate? ‘Peter meter’ is an obvious one, as might be ‘Dick discovery’ or ‘Jock’s cock’. But no? The app designers named it ‘Chubby Checker’.

Unfortunately for Magic Apps, the creators – now defunct, Chubby Checker happens to be the name of a renowned pop star. Although his heyday might have been 50 years ago, he is still alive. In 2008 he even had a No. 1 hit in the US dance charts with “Knock down the Walls”. Now he wants a slice of the ‘Chubby Checker’ app profits – a big one! His lawyers are demanding US$500 million.

Not revealed in the lawsuit if the size of the real Chubby Checker’s shoe!

Some men stuff socks into their briefs to create a larger impression. Relative to that, my shoes are admittedly oversized. Maybe a sock stuffed into the toe would solve the problem! Socks to the rescue once again! Or I might possibly need to buy smaller shoes. But then the app would prove to be woefully embarrassing!

 

I like the name "Dilly Detector."