The Organ

[Guest Larstrup]

23 minutes ago, AdamSmith said:

She is (and has ever been, in the most deliciously, drily, cutting of ways) the Mistress of the House in that regard.

 

 Personally I never thought of @MsAnn as having a full head of hair. Most, seemingly regale him (her) for his chiseled good  looks and muscular body. But  I digress. 

[Guest Larstrup]

 

 

[Guest Larstrup]

 

[Guest Larstrup]

On 1/24/2018 at 9:15 PM, MsAnn said:

 

Please don’t attempt to make me feel better via the organ playing my most conflictive and emotional hymn ever. But thank you, nonetheless. Why do these moments always happen in church, with an organ?  Sigh. I just hope that the “one” will  bless my crib too. While I’m in it. As it is. Lacking the church’s preconceived notion of who burns in hell because of it. I love this hymn, nevertheless.

I love you. 

Love, Lars.

[Guest Larstrup]

I loved and still love him. 

[AdamSmith]

 

[AdamSmith]

 

WAR ROOM

Donald Rumsfeld’s Snowflake Poetry Is Exactly What America Needs Right Now

In newfound verse from 2001, the former defense secretary rages against time, space and indecipherable acronyms.

By HART SEELY politico.com January 27, 2018

Be honest: When you heard Donald Rumsfeld had released his “snowflakes,” your first thoughts were that the former defense secretary must have taken hostages at a Brooklyn Starbucks. In fact, George Washington University’s National Security Archive this week released a colossal trove—more than 900 pages—of Rumsfeldian memos from 2001, which were known back then as “snowflakes.”

Almost instantly, the Twitter tag #rummysnowflakes whisked us to the days when Rumsfeld was a media sensation, as America prepared to fight two wars with a tax cut tied behind its back. In Pentagon briefings, he regaled the nation with pithy comments about shaved gorillas and chickens in barnyards, and in 2002, he rendered to the world his oratorical masterpiece about “known knowns,” the things that we know we know. “We know there are some things we do not know,” he continued. “But there are also unknown unknowns, the ones we don’t know we don’t know.” A star was born.

It formed the basis of Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential Poetry of Donald H. Rumsfeld, my collection of his spoken verses. Like Andy Warhol’s “15 minutes of fame,” Rumsfeld’s “unknown unknowns” will be remembered long after Guantanamo Bay is underwater. But what about these newfound memos, an avalanche of words that until now have languished for 17 years in bureaucratic limbo? Is there poetry in the piles?

I have looked, and I am now choosing my words as carefully as possible:

It’s as if we found an NPR tote bag owned by Emily Dickinson!

People, this is poetry gold! The Snowflake Verses reveal an evolving bard, bursting with creativity—Rumsfeld wrote memos the way Donald Trump downs Diet Cokes—as he faced his personal unknown unknowns. Look closely, and you can see the roots of his future existentialism.

CONUNDRUM

In thinking through 
one of the problems 
between State and Defense, 
we have to make sure 
that none of your people 
at the levels below you folks 
end up clearing things 
and then getting it up to you 
and you not agreeing 
and then we have to go back 
and undo the clearance 
with State and NSC. 
Sept. 24, 2001, 6:23 p.m.

Throughout these verses, Rumsfeld paints himself as a solitary man, seeking to do right in a world gone mad.

FEAR OF THE GIFT

If I am going 
to be giving gifts,

I have to know 
what’s in them.

I can’t just 
pass them out. 
Nov. 5, 2001 (no time stamp)

On a daily—sometimes hourly—basis, he battles what we now describe as “deep state” forces that seek to devour him, as depicted in this dark trilogy on the shackles of time.

CALENDAR, PART 1

Every day I have to ask for my calendar. 
I shouldn’t have to do that. 
Tonight, it is 5:40 p.m. 
I say to myself, “Gee, 
“I haven’t seen my calendar.” 
I need to get it by mid-day, 
so I can affect it for the period ahead. 
Please don’t make me ask for it. 
Nov. 16, 2001, 9:13 a.m.

CALENDAR, PART 2

I have a feeling that 
the things I want to do 
that we have to drop 
off the calendar 
don’t get put back on. 
For example, 
I still need a dentist appointment. 
Nov. 28, 2001,1:21 p.m.

CALENDAR, PART 3

We have to stop doing this to me. 
There is no way I can function 
if I have the calendar I have. 
I don’t have a single second to do anything. 
I cannot make the phone calls I need to make, 
I cannot debrief after the previous meetings, etc. 
I have had four meetings today, 
and all I have is a stack 
of about three inches of paper 
that I haven’t dictated off of. 
It isn’t going to work.
Nov. 28, 2001, 1:38 p.m.

Often, Rumsfeld wrestles with his own identity, posing unanswerable questions to Torie Clarke, a top aide, and Newt Gingrich, apparently an imaginary muse.

WHAT AM I?

Please pull together a list 
of all the things I am 
automatically a member of 
because of my role as Secretary of Defense. 
For example, I understand I am 
now a member of 
the Homeland Security Council. 
Of course, I am also 
a member of the Cabinet 
and the National Security Council. 
Are there other things? 
Oct. 17, 2001, 7:04 a.m.

Occasionally, the poet unleashes a primal cry for help, directed caustically at his captors.

MISSION FOR JACOBY

I am seeing very little. 
Everyone in the room 
is seeing all kinds of videos 
and pictures and talking about them, 
and I have no idea 
what they are talking about. 
Why don’t you assign Jacoby – 
that is something useful he could do.
Oct. 10, 2001, 12:29 p.m.

THE TARDY ONES

What do you think 
about having a rule 
that if people cannot 
get to a meeting on time, 
they shouldn’t come? 
Oct. 19, 2001, 8:21 a.m.

A MODEST PLAN TO SAVE THE WORLD

I have been waiting and waiting
For a report on what we plan
To do for the rest of the world.
I have pushed, I have sent memos,

And I have begged and pleaded.
There must be some kind
of an interim report 
someone can give me. Thanks.
Oct. 23, 2001, 9:08 a.m.

Most of all, these snowflakes touch upon the loneliness of being the secretary of defense.

A PLEA TO ANYONE 
WHO FINDS THIS NOTE

I don’t want them to use initials 
that I don’t understand. 
I don’t want them to use acronyms 
I don’t understand, 
and I want them to date everything! 
I have to ask questions 
about every third piece of paper I receive. 
There is no reason for that.
June 9, 2001, (no time stamp)

I DO NOT KNOW THESE PEOPLE

Please tell people 
to stop using only their titles 
and start using their names 
in addition to the titles 
on correspondence. 
Here is a memo. 
I don’t know who these people are. 
Nov. 12, 2001, 5:03 p.m.

COLD, TIRED HAND

Here is the Congressional report 
on foreign military training.

I started signing everything, 
And I got tired.

You can have somebody 
sign the rest of them with the machine. 
March 10, 2001, 4:24 p.m.

The poems are not always so depressing. At one point, a playful Rumsfeld changes pace with a Seussian rhyme.

CHU TO YOU!

Visit with David Chu,
And tell me what you two
THINK WE OUGHT TO DO!
Thanks!
May 29, 2001, 8:52 a.m.

Sadly, the documents do not include Rumsfeld’s response to Pieces of Intelligence after the book came out in 2003. I know he was aware of it: I sent him an autographed copy. He sent back a tersely worded letter and a check for $14.95, the book’s retail value. Hopefully, in some future document dump, we will find that the book inspired a poem. For now, I must wait for the gristmills to grind.

THE THINGS THAT COULD HAPPEN

We ought to think through 
what are the bad things 
that could happen, 
and what are the good things 
that could happen 
that we need to be ready for. 
Nov. 23, 2001 (no time stamp)

Hart Seely has compiled three books of spoken poems: O Holy Cow: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto, Pieces of Intelligence: The Existential Poetry of Donald H. Rumsfeld, and Bard of the Deal: The Poetry of Donald Trump. You can find him on Twitter at @Seelysays, or at his New York Yankees fan blog, IT IS HIGH! IT IS FAR! IT IS caught.

https://www.politico.com/magazine/story/2018/01/27/donald-rumsfelds-snowflake-poetry-is-exactly-what-america-needs-right-now-216534

[AdamSmith]

http://calteches.library.caltech.edu/34/3/FeynmanLosAlamos.htm

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

On 1/23/2018 at 5:32 AM, AdamSmith said:

 

Much better MP3 transfer of same performance (the updated picture does not denote a later performance):

 

[AdamSmith]

 

[AdamSmith]

 

[AdamSmith]

 

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

To repeat sublimity...

 

[MsAnn]

On 1/26/2018 at 8:21 PM, Larstrup said:

 Skimming through this the thread from a week ago, allows me to pronounce @MsAnn as  having the best door shutting,  in your face,  GIF ever! It  used to be so subtle. But no longer. She’s become a slammer girl.   and I like it!

 

 

 

On 1/26/2018 at 8:31 PM, AdamSmith said:

She is (and has ever been, in the most deliciously, drily, cutting of ways) the Mistress of the House in that regard.

 

[MsAnn]

 

[MsAnn]

 

[MsAnn]

[AdamSmith]

Some more spice... 

[AdamSmith]

 

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]

[AdamSmith]