Londoner

Fair enough but a massage or an encounter isn't the same as meal in a restaurant. The tip is not an extra for an app guy; it's only payment. If he isn't much good- and we've all met such guys- unless you are prepared for a confrontation and capable of winning one, my advice stands. Get rid of him quickly.

12is12....no, not in my estimation. Some are, some aren't and some are what I call (using an old English word) "fey". in the Good Old Days, there were plenty of twink bars in Pattaya where the guys were very cute, under twenty-three or so, gay and straight-acting. In fact it was they who brought me to Thailand in 1995. And kept me returning.

Not quite the same situation but I recall a masseur years ago in Boyztown who was offed for ten days or so by a falang and had to spend the day sitting with him on the terrace, he on his phone, the falang reading a book. Not only that; the falang had LT-offed two masseurs. There they sat, one on each side of him, day after day, bored and frustrated. I assumed they had to ask permission to go for a ching-chong!

My advice to Olddaddy and anyone else facing disappointing service is "mai pen rai"; take it in your stride. You are on holiday and I suspect (and hope ) that the loss of a 100bht note won't result in your going hungry. And I'd say the same if it's 1000bht wasted on an unhappy app encounter or bar off. In such circumstances, pay and get rid of the miscreant quickly. Shrug your shoulders and say "Next time, it'll be better..." Perhaps there may even be lessons leaned from your choice of visitor or masseur. If you wish to make a moral stand, choose an issue of more importance.

It's the smile. It worked eighteen years ago and the guy who provided it is still enjoying the consequences. As I am. And just to confirm how correct z909 is, I remember his telling me soon after we met about the advice he gave to a newbie at his bar. In one word, smile.

Lucky you! I have to wait three weeks for my return. After thirty months away. I hope your trip all goes well. And so for me the usual....butterflies in the stomach, obsessive pre-planning of journey and arrival, disturbed sleep patterns. All worth it.

Yes....he's a good guide and he likes and respects the Thai people.

Coincidentally, I was on a London Underground train yesterday. Opposite me was a sign that said , in effect, "Staring can be a form of sexual harassment. Don't do it" Makes sense.

People must be fed-up with me referring to The Good Old Days ....but in one respect, they don't compare with what's on offer, at least in Pattaya, today. In the 90s, I found the time between breakfast and the bars opening quite tedious. A couple of hours on Jomtien beach- which never impressed me after holidaying in the Caribbean for a decade- and then....well, not much until the go go bars opened, never before 2100. No Sansuk. Only Royal Garden in which to cool-off and have a coffee. Not even a decent TV programme. And, no apps with which to engage a partner for the afternoon. I must be honest; Pattaya is now more of a twenty-four city than it was then.

1995, first visit; up at 1000, bed at 0100. Now, up at 0730, bed at 2200. Sums up getting old. P is a farmer and so he's the same, fortunately.

Luang Prabang in Laos is also worth a visit. Vientianne, the capital, in my opinion isn't.

As far as islands are concerned, the more "off the beaten track" , the better they are. Go south, young man, and if you don't like the idea of a sea ferry, there's always Krabi. For me, the pearl in Thailand's crown is the far north. Chiang Rai is an excellent base for touring. The driving is easy, the roads quiet, the views spectacular and, if you prefer to hire a driver, we've always been able to get one for about 1000bht a day. Hotels at all prices and my favourite night market.

What forms are we required to fill-out? I thought presentation of the TP QR ensured immediate entry.

You won't get a phone call like you would in the Amsterdam brothels that taught me how to be gay in the 90s. In Thailand, I appreciated a chat, and drink from the minibar, before and after. In fact, I was a little cross if the time was exclusively bed-centred, noting that the best performances usually followed some degree of social interaction.

In the 90s, I often sported a beard. However, on advice which I respected (but can't recall its origin), I learnt that Thais "don't trust" men with beards....and so shaved it off for my first trip . It has never been allowed to grow again! I also recall experiences in Babylon's darkroom where Thais searched my chest for evidence of hair, soon learning that I needed to be clean-shaven there as well.

In some African tribal communities, too.

If you look at falang visitors as a whole, there is a distinction; many of those who are in BKK at a particular time are there for a short period...BKK+ CNX + beach, or variations thereof. Not so many BBK tourists stay for a week or more though I know some do . In Pattaya, on the other hand (or Phuket, for example), the beach location results in tourists staying longer. Not many will travel to Pattaya for just three or so days. There are also business men in BKK who are there for a couple or so nights only and may enjoy a bar or two. Soi Thaniya? This means that the guys on the scene in BKK and Pattaya may have different expectations, or even hopes and aspirations. In Pattaya, a successful interaction may lead to two weeks of paid employment while a BBK mb will be less likely to expect a repeat performance. On balance, I suspect that the Pattaya guy is likely to provide the better service. However, I've read of many falangs who have different experiences. I'm talking in generalities, of course. Another issue may be that the Pattaya guys often live close together and may even have arrived together as a childhood friends. I'm no expert on the bar-scene of today but my distinct recollection is that the Pattaya bars were more fun, with more inter-dancer interaction, teasing and joking and so on, compared to BKK, where the guys were more likely to be workmates...not "mates." Sometimes they may live miles away from anyone else in that bar. Just a recollection, mind you..

Me too. Asian customers are more generous than us....I am told. After all, many falangs are in Thailand on a budget while the Asian visitors, at least the ones who aren't in the huge tour groups, are generally wealthier.

I don't know about today but back in the late 90s ladyboy beauty competitions were held in some schools while, today, young ladyboys are accepted even in rural communities. Or so I'm told.. Heaven knows what US Republicans would say about all this....though I suspect that some of them may protest too much. Ladyboy competitions in Florida or Texas may be particularly interesting. It's all to do with Buddhism, of course, though that probably deserves a thread of its own.

I'm with you....though not about the punch in the mouth! I always needed a "come-on" from my chosen partner- a smile was invariably enough. I recall my second trip in '95; I stayed at Le Cafe Royal and there was a waiter for whom I had the hots. Remember those little white shorts and peach shirts? I knew he was married and kept my feelings to myself. On the day I left , I was waiting for my taxi and he was working. A falang arrived; his brief conversation amounted to when and where. The waiter told him. That's all it took. I wish I could say that I learnt my lesson. But I stayed exactly the same. To be honest, we are what we are. when it comes to this issue.

Me too. That's an excellent price for a hotel of that quality. It may go up for the high season, of course. However, it values returning guests,so take advantage. By the way, I'm told that they have an arrangement "elsewhere" for daily breakfasts at 100bht a time.

Not the Thai way.....that isn't the way the game is played. Take care. An app guy?

P doesn't consider the term "money-boy" offensive. For the only time in our eighteen years of eating out and travelling together, P told me one evening that he'd just been insulted by a group of young guys- Thais- in Pattaya's Central mall. He was livid. Very unusual. He wouldn't tell me what they'd said but I assumed that it was a word associated with prostitution. "Money-boy and bar -boy OK," he said "but not...." and here he quoted the Thai word he'd just heard.

No... I was referring to the bar-fine.

I had a similar experience years ago in Pattaya with a very cute guy from a gay bar. Very, very cute. The assignation had already started to go wrong due to his lack of interest in my needs when his phone rang; "Mama, " he said, beginning a long conversation.. We returned to the business I'd paid for, once more without reciprocity. And then the d**n thing rang again. "Mama, " he said. I took a shower and showed him the door. A year later (or was it two?), the same guy came up to me in the same bar, sat with me and suggested a reunion. He'd worked-out I was a soft touch. Or perhaps that I was incredibly handsome. I said no.