Canadianbtmguy

Certainly you are passing judgment, but I don’t mind at all. Indeed it would be helpful if you expound on your criticism. Which part are you saying is high-risk? And how could it have been improved? Unlike in Brazil, where I stay in Airbnb‘s, this is an all-hotel trip for the very reason of having a reception. In hindsight, Having a one bedroom suite, with therefore a second door (or least bringing him into the bedroom) was a mistake in hindsight. I did not see any “motels” as some use in Brazil and of course, there’s no sauna with Garotos. And yes I did reward the reception not only with cash but with a bottle of South Africa wine, which my husband found empty on the street a few doors down the next morning, as well as a Beautiful plate of cakes and fruits that was gone within the hour.

Undoubtedly a relevant factor, but I would not put it all down to poverty. Also "it can happen anywhere" is a bit conclusory, as of course it can, but the question is how often it, in fact, does. Other factors, including culture also play a role, in terms of what sort of behaviors are acceptable to resort to when one is poor. Variance can be seen among countries at high wealth levels (Yes, it "can" happen in Japan, but much more commonly "does" in the US) down to the lowest (I am in Rwanda and I was in Mozambique, which both have extremely safe streets, almost certainly more so than Rio or El Salvador, at much higher income levels.) Although street crime in Maputo is unacceptable, Scamming seems culturally acceptable, even among Mozambicans themselves, whereas Rwandans, even given an easy opening for a scam don't seem to take it. In some countries at similar income levels, baksheesh is customary, others it is criminal.

Wow, what a disappointment, especially because you thought you knew him. Glad he didn’t get away with it, although much of the harm to you, I imagine, was beyond the actual possessions

In a trip report of Africa I am writing in the Africa forum,( www.gayguides.com/topic/72912-bottoming-in-sub-saharan-africa/#findComment-473447 ) I describe a Grindr guy who only afterwards decided he was a “sex worker” and demanded crazy sums; I refused, after which he refused to leave and attempted to physically restrain me from seeking help. While I have seen the horror stories of killings in Brazil described here and elsewhere I am more interested in the personal experiences of forum members. I have invited, (I estimate) a couple of hundred GPs to my apartments and a few dozen (free) Grindr guys, and there have been very very few who tried to change the financial arrangements and none who resorted to violence. Have I just been lucky or can we say this is just not the custom and practice? (I would like to compartmentalize what happened in Mozambique as something not to worry about in Brazil) N.B. PLEASE responses only from guys who invite men over their apartments/go to their place. This is not at all the place for guys who meet only in the sauna to proclaim the safety and superiority of meeting in the sauna only. Again, please the question asked is of any violence you HAVE experienced, NOT violence you may have avoided by sticking to the saunas. I appreciate in advance to sauna-only guys from refraining from doing so. 😎

In short, Maputo was a weird disaster. I have to keep telling myself that this is a trip animated by FOMO and so, in a way, it’s a good thing that it doesn’t work out. So, the guys I met were from Grindr, neither with any mention of money in advance. The first one, after an ok but rather brief and forgettable sex, demanded, not asked, for taxi fare home (there’s no Uber) in the amount of 1000 metecais (I think $15usd). I repeatedly explained that my husband had the money because he was out and so I did not have any there (I did have some but there was no way to get it discreetly to avoid opening the question of more.) Finally, I think it was he who hit on the idea of borrowing it from reception (although by that time he wanted twice as much) It all seemed a ruse, since the taxi from the airport was less than $2. But the guy at reception, who was very good natured and open minded, when I mentioned the 1000, he said maybe he does need 1500 because it’s far, I kept the lid on it at 1000, and off he went with a taxi driver loitering in the lobby (the minimum wage is something like 200 metecais a day, he would’ve been much smarter to take a minibus home rather than splurging on a taxi. Distasteful enough but not awful. The second one with fake pics and (later revealed) fake dick size arrived about an hour later. As a footnote, no one fills out their profile ( not least height, which is important to me) and nearly all use disappearing pictures, so that you have extremely little idea who will show up. After the first one, I had resolved to ask them about money when they show up but it seemed preposterous that he could want much if anything. He wanted to enlist his friend too, which I suggested (falsely) that we save for tomorrow and shortly after he got his pants off and had trouble getting hard I suggested how much fun we could all have tomorrow. After he dressed he made outrageous demands ranging from 100-500 usd. In anticipation that whoever showed up might want taxi money I had in my pocket 5 euros, 20 reais and a bunch of 2 reais. He deserved absolutely nothing, but I had dropped the 20 reais somehow so I gave him that money and tried to get him to leave. He blocked my exit from the bedroom (it was an aparthotel with a bedroom) and soon we were wrestling, me trying to escape and him trying to prevent it. In what seemed like a full 10 minutes, I finally was able to open the bedroom door, though having won that battle, I think he was exhausted—not that I wasn’t—and I reached the front door within two minutes, and I was able to call for help. The same guy from reception talked to him, and about the same time my husband returned, angry that he would not leave. The receptionist returned with 2 security guards wearing bulletproof vests. He claimed that he was a “sex worker” and I had agreed to pay him; In the meantime he had blocked me on Grindr, preventing access to evidence contrary to his claims that I had agreed to pay him. The receptionist/diplomat tried to deescalate the situation and told me if I gave him 1000 metecais he would leave. I so would have rather given it to someone hardworking and honest, being a very large sum there, but we all wanted him out of there. Afterwards, in repaying the receptionist the 1000 metecais for the first guy, we gave him a second one, as well as a beautiful fruit plate I prepared and a bottle of South African wine that my husband found empty the next day. Any suggestions on how I might deal with/ prevent this situation in my remaining destinations are welcome. One is to ask the guy in advance (in a nonjudgmental way) if he is seeking money (although the answer above suggests a gray area); another is to have my husband secretly around in case trouble develops, (although he’s not going to be thrilled at doing that) I was pretty demoralized after that and the only way I could really continue was with my husband secretly present so I raised my standards basically impossibly high. At the same time, in other respects, we were learning that, although the country is remarkably safe, everyone is scamming. Even the toll taker tried to scam our driver—and that’s just one of at least 10 we fell into in just 5 days. I did not meet anyone else. Ps. The second guy mistook the 20 reais for 20 euros—that was the only fun part of that story, when he realizes that his total take is only about half what he thought it was…. Incidentally here’s what a couple of guys said about what happened: São assim mesmo esses Ta cheio de vagabundo por aí Nao tô preocupado com dinheiro não!! Mas se quiser ajudar aceito (Basically that sucks what happened, I’m not seeking money, but….if you decide to help, I accept) Mau isso Fizeram isso por ver a cor da sua pele Vce estava com ladrões Eu não estou a procura de dinheiro.. Para ter dinheiro trabalho Sexo n é por dinheiro (Stronger: that’s bad, they did it bc of the color of your skin , you were with thieves, I don’t seek money, to have money I work, sex is not for money)

First stop was South Africa, kind of a subsaharan Africa “lite” (the same way that Türkiye is Middle East “lite”) I arrived in Johannesburg 24 hours before my husband and I imagined one after the other. In the morning I arrived at my hotel around 8 am and while I was waiting for them to make up my room there were at least 4 guys (free, from Grindr, both black and white) eager to come over. When I got my room around 9, I figured this was a marathon not a sprint and so I gave in to the temptation to sleep, until around 12. None of the guys from earlier were online and no one seemed keen. Regrettably I seemed to have some deep tiredness (despite taking an Adderall). It was also atypically chilly and the bed so comfortable I often got under the covers. I would nod off in the middle of writing a Grindr message, and most of the afternoon and evening I spent that way. What a waste. I would have to say that compared to say, Brazil, it seems very few South Africans workout at all. They also seem rather short, and seeing a profile below 5 feet is not unusual. After my husband arrived I didn’t have much time alone (I recommend the workers museum and the Africa museum, which are across the street from each other and off the beaten path) I met a couple of guys from from Grindr but they were quite forgettable (except that one had only about 5”, I don’t know how I let that slip through…) There are a few guys with great bodies, but they are charging (up to 3000rand/200usd with condom and 6000rand condomless; likely I suffered from a foreigners surcharge even tho I used my Brazilian WhatsApp.) These were from rentmen, surprisingly hunqz did not seem in use, and the ones that were charging on Grindr (as low as 200 Rand) didn’t seem to be worth paying for. I should note that at least the ones that otherswise attracted me on rentmen were mid-late 30s, although said to be 6’6”. With one exception not especially friendly on WhatsApp. I thought I might have time to meet one the last day but I didn’t. Left the next day for the wildly colorful spring wildflower bloom in Namaqualand, which is very far 4-7 hours from CapeTown (or any other airport) but a sight to behold. This pic was from a nearly all-black mining town, in which nearly everyone greeted us with a wave or a hello! En route now to Maputo where I am hoping the real fun begins. The first two days are forecast to be an unseasonable heatwave and while my heat-tolerant husband is out exploring,I expect to stay inside exploring.

I would even defend that I upset the market prices. He was so far outside the typical market; how many guys do you open the door and say WOW! and how many do you still say WOW! on his way out. It's not like I was in Lagoa throwing 500 reais at ordinary guys (which I think some enjoy doing to be seen as rich, or generous, whatever...) This guy was fucking amazing (if not amazing fucking) so I would say that buying from, say, La Maison du Chocolat, I would not even be in the same market as Hershey bars...😍

Ladies, ladies please! Life is too short--so many men so little time!--lets not waste it tearing each other apart. No doubt, there is some prose that is, um...baroque, but sometimes I enjoy it, and in any case, you are always free to skip those posts. I have found prices to really be on a tear the last year or 2, more so in SP online than in the sauna or in RIo. In July a guy who really appeared to be "my type", without the usual compromise (usually as to the face) quoted 700. I invited him over, I opened the door and my reaction was, WOW! He was 6'4" great body and beautiful face. Yet with just a regular guy personality...he didn't shirk on the kissing, or indeed the fucking (it wasnt the best fuck ever, I wouldnt be surprised if in his private life he was a bottom, but still quite a good one, he finally bred me without the haggling some do, and just very nice) Nor did he jump up to take a shower and leave afterwards. In fact, I tipped him up to 800, because he really had exceeding my (already high) expectations I contacted him again to meet the day I was leaving, he cagily asked to meet at his place rather than mine (we later laughed when I suggested it was because he didn't like my Airbnb and he admitted it was true) He had a little more trouble getting hard that day, but still, to look up at that beautiful man on top of me was really a nice experience. I teased him about how on my next trip I was going to insist he grew out his chest hair, and he seemed open to it. So yeah, I would say he was expensive...without being overpriced.

We leave for a trip next week (thanks to ANA's now defunct around the world awards) that starts off innocently enough in Australia, but then continues on to Johannesburg, Cape Town (both of which I have been to about 6-7 years ago with pretty good success with free guys from Grindr, although granted, I was 6-7 years younger haha). That was the easy obvious choice. The question was, where to next? My criteria were safe in general, safe for gay people, and not miserably hot. (Although Nigeria was where I most wanted to go--after a guy I had met in Cape Town had responded to my compliment of the thickness of his dick and said "Well, thank you, but it's not like I'm Nigerian or something!"--it met none of my criteria). Finally, I decided on Maputo (although I later realized the guide I had bought, which extolled its safety, was published in 2011!); Kigali (definitely the safest of the 3, although I am getting worried that my husband is trying to hijack our time there to go see the gorillas...) and finally, gulp, Abidjan (basically as close to Nigeria as I could get; Accra was a runner-up, but it seems that there is a lot of anti-gay agitation currently, whereas Abidjan is merely becoming more unsafe for everyone). But yes, like the OP, I do give a slight edge on the sexy scale to West Africans so I did want to include one spot there. I did notice recently that Senegal is at Level 1 in the State Department's risk rankings (most of western Europe is in level 2, same as Cote d'Ivoire, huh?) but maybe it was unsafe for gay people? Anyways, no regrets and more importantly, changes not allowed on the tickets, so....we'll see. If anyone has any suggestions about any of these (particularly things I should do in the next week before leaving) let me know, either here or by message (I got my yellow fever vaccine last time I was in Brazil) Speaking of which...after a brief stop in Europe the trip ends in SP, a sort of insurance.

How did he rip you off? I did meet Kau Cobra in SP after many attempts and I would say it was fairly good, if a bit mechanical (he says he is straight). Rather personable too, I should add.

For those who prefer Copa, I once stayed about a week (due to an Accor promo) at the Ibis posto 5. Again no problem. I think the problem that some posters may be having is that their visitors go to reception. You need to either meet them out in front (which is very easy to do since you’ll probably be paying for their Uber so you will know exactly when they are arriving) or, if you know them and/or perceive them to be able to follow instructions, you can tell them to come straight up to your room without engaging with reception. All and all, though, unless you must have a hotel for some reason (that I don’t see) I must’ve rented at least 30 airbnbs in Rio and never ever ever had a problem bringing up visitors. (NOT true in São Paulo)

I usually stay at an airbnb but on occasion I’ve stayed in hotels and I recommend the HotelDiamond in Glória, less than 5 minute walk from 117. I’ve never tried bringing guests up at 3am, but until at least midnight there’s a lot of traffic in and out (it’s a fairly big hotel) and you and/or your guest can just come right in, access the elevator (no key required) and go right up.

I do have to dissent a little on this one, as much as I would like to believe the lack of correlation. I definitely think those on the lower end of the market, it is typically not just because they have been slow to raise their prices (although yes, I’ve experienced exceptions). The pictures are off, the service is lousy, he needs the money more than you need the sex….again, not always, but usually. On the high end, if it is still within the range of normal (say up to 450 in SP on garotocomlocal, whereas normal for the kind of guys I like is 350, maybe 400) I would have to say it’s likely that they are some combination of extra-accurate pictures and good service. Higher than that, in some cases I have been open to paying, but I did not find them better than the ones I just referred to, that are just on the high end. also with a higher incidence of oddness Not surprisingly guys who push meeting are poorly correlated with a good experience. Oddly, the ones that are very difficult (you’d think they were just flakes or whatever) can actually be quite good when you finally (after a year of trying haha) be quite good One relevant factor that may explain parts of all of this is that guys who give a good performance are likely to attract repeat clients, which add to demand, which they can deal with in some combination of raising their price and being busy. somewhat sadly (for us) those who are really really good are in some cases lost entirely to Europe or elsewhere (or theoretically to a very rich man who takes them off the market, although I have yet to lose any of my favorites to that, whereas I have lost quite a few to “the exterior”, as I’ve heard Brazilians call it.) For lack of anywhere else to put the information, a really stunning 190cm tall country boy who I have written about previously (who failed in Europe, interestingly) who has been going off and on to Martinique to work in a restaurant (owned by a client, I’m guessing, although he denies it…) was just hired by a (the?) soccer team in Martinique. Parabens to him. ( the other guy I’ve written often about—the really sweet one who took care of my best friend’s father for a month—sadly is not doing well at all)

I went, albeit pretty early 5:30 maybe. At that point the music is manageable for calls. Although about 80% of my attention was consumed by the Copa issue, I did keep 20% to look at passing guys as I sat in the booth, and I didn’t get the sense there was anyone I wanted. My flight from Sdu to Brasilia (from where my ticket began) was 9ish and for once I wished I was flying from GIG (so I could’ve checked in with copa there) but I didn’t want the added stress of staying til the last minute so I uncharacteristically left early and arrived at Sdu early.

Actually no one asked me for a printed copy (despite the warnings on the visa) Actually my night at 202 was ruined and abbreviated by when I tried to checkin online with Copa it wouldn’t allow it (it was the first segment of an ANA star alliance around the world ticket, so I was a little worried that it would end up a complicated mess at the airport) I googled Copa and shame on google (and shame on me) but the first number listed was an 800 number, which I called. Copa’s true number is not toll-free (shame on Copa for fomenting confusion). So I called this number, they knew a remarkable amount about my itinerary and they said that ANA had neglected to collect the government taxes and that’s why I can’t checkin online. In order to travel I would have to pay the taxes (to Copa?) They knew so much about my itinerary (and I couldn’t understand them so well, which is far from unusual), so I was kind of going along with the story. They sent me an invoice—with my itinerary—to pay $700. ANA and United (the latter being the second leg) both had hour plus waits. I probably would’ve paid it, I confess, if they had a better email, relating to Copa! Finally, I located the needle of Copa’s US number in the haystack. It’s +17868402672. They still couldn’t easily say why I couldn’t checkin online but they said everything ok. But all the time wasted to these putative scammers left no time for fun. (and the two Garotos I met in the afternoon were awful) I will have to look forward to a better next trip, although I don’t when

Done. Just in time for my return tomorrow night.🤣 Well, at least Ill have a wednesday night at 202... (And I dont have to engage in subterfuge to get to the international departures at Brasilia, nor spend 18 hours there...)

Especially considering today is a tuesday 🥺 And we all know what that means

I wrote to a (understandably) rather hidden government email (dim@itamaraty.com.br) for those who have been waiting 5 or more business days. He says it has now been issued. I see no other evidence of that. Still says "under check". But do the airlines have it in their "systems" nevertheless? Sure wish I had written to it yesterday or even Friday.

Due to my self-inflicted wound (described in another thread) of waiting until the last minute to apply for my Brazilian visa, 10 days have passed, and unless it materializes in the next few, my trip to Brazil will have become a trip to Buenos Aires, with the Brazil portion limited to a very long 18-hour or so layover in Brasilia airport, which presumably, I would not be able to leave without the visa. In wistfully perusing garotocomlocal for Brasilia, I came across a guy I know from SP. (I could get him in the Intl terminal by buying him a refundable award ticket to my destination), but then where do we go? (I'm really not one for a quickie in a bathroom stall, not because I am above a bathroom stall, I just dont like quickies...) It seems the domestic terminal has sleep pods (2 guests maximum! haha) as well as showers in at least one of the lounges. These are things one would more expect in an international terminal, but I see no evidence of either. And again, I presumably can't go to the domestic terminal. (Although I am curious if, with all the Brazil stamps in my passport, if I went through to customs they might not just let me through to go to a hotel....) I suppose we could just cuddle in a remote corner or something... Any Brasilia-ans (what does one call a resident of Brasilia?) with any suggestions?

It's a holiday in AU, CA and US, my visa status check still says Under check ,I don't really have much hope of a Brazilian trip anymore as I have to go home on thursday. Luckily I have been enjoying it here in BA more than at first; after having given up on the paid guys here, I turned to that last resort of free ones on Grindr, which seems to not to have any significant number of money-seekers here. With Grindr, the pat months I had (a bit painfully, it's true) been going through the process of giving up free guys, after gaining (another) 5 kilos (despite my Brazilian Ozempic, I first lost a few kilos, then plateaued then eventually headed back up). My Grindr pics date to the dawn of digital photography. Yet, to my surprise, I hooked up with two quite appealing guys (not the creme of the creme, indeed, but if they turned up at 2025 Lagoa they would be middle-of-the-pack). And not only did they not turn me down (I didn't, for example, dare use Grindr on a recent trip to France, home of the turn-down...) but were both complimentary to me and enthusiastic in sex. (A third guy closer to my own age was less enthusiastic.) The second one was a Venezolano who stuck around for a cuddle and a chat before going for an encore, and despite a bit of unease arising from my prejudice that Venezolano=money seeking, my prejudice was disconfirmed when he asked for nothing more than a shower and a kiss goodbye.

In BCN...I think airbnbs are close to illegal. Hotels, other than mom and pop running a floor in a building (which I thought could be difficult to receive guests, who, in this case never came to exist, haha), could not be found under 100 euro and on many nights 150. BA, does have reasonable airbnbs, one of the few things I found to be reasonably priced (the boys in some cases are asking more than in BCN!)

I did have a few days in Barcelona before heading to Buenos Aires to wait for my Brazil visa approval, (and wait and wait....) it's a gorgeous city, to be sure. The comparison to Buenos AIres is painful (since I'm in BA). Lacking airbnbs, the hotel rates are high. Despite its beauty bcn still not the place for guys. Those in the sauna still not handsome (one charmer who was fairly handsome was so busy that I never had a chance) The guys online seem better, but the response rate is so low, the responses are so slow in coming, if at all, (a return message at 3am?) Was it my Brazilian whatsapp that they thought I didn't have the money or wasn't really in spain? But I met only one guy (who grossly exaggerated his height and dick size and I think wouldve been much happier as a bottom). Lasted about 15 minutes, he did breed. Totally boring 150 euro. And that was the only sex I had in about a 4 days stay, despite there being at least 10 others I wouldve like to have met had only they responded in appropriate time frames.

One thing that may be something of much greater discussion in the future (and has the potential to save the sauna) is that the pics from soytuyo.com of the guy I met were not old pics (he was, in fact, younger than I expected) they were, better pics. The tattoos were in the right place, but the pics made him seem better looking, more muscular and much better hung. Is this AI? Is this the future? If so, It certainly threatens to infect the brazilian sites and thereby reinvigorate the saunas

The only cause of delay I can think of at this point is that I went too often and so it was suspicious. Also, riobard mentions financial questions; my memory is deteriorated but I don't recall any. Did I skip a page? The San Telmo/Boca area is cute in a latin american way (simple houses, brightly colored). As for this "Paris of the South" though, the majestic buildings are widely spread, so far as I've seen. Most of the area I've seen (which is between Recoleta and Palermo) I would describe as Gloria shorn of its hills and sea. Lots of post-war multi-story buildings in a rundown state. Often the streets are lined with tall trees, which is helpful, but It doesn't look like Jardims for example, because there is very little construction from this century. Lots of trendy shops like Jardims, though. Trendy bakeries, my other touristic interest besides men, are definitely present, and largely quite good, although oddly expensive, especially cookies (which are often priced higher than pains au chocolat...as high as USD8!) Lacking many paid guys who interest me, I did hit Grindr with some success (and if I could have waken myself up last night around 11pm there were several quite good looking guys who were ready to come over (for free)). Will pursue that again later today. Oddly few complaints about my old pics.

After flagging my photo for being able to see my teeth (and barely, it wasn’t some kind of toothy grin) that delayed it several days. I called and she said now that everything was in order it would be submitted to the consulate and I should expect an answer in 10 business days. I thought surely she was joking (she wasn’t the humorous type; better said she was misinformed, either intentionally or accidentally) but altogether 8 days have elapsed. I came to Buenos Aires because of a great award redemption in First, thinking I would barely have any time before the visa was approved. To think a couple months ago in the good old days I just waltzed in to Brazil, often showing my teeth. I have to be home Thursday and I’m beginning if I will even arrive in time for my return flight😢 what exactly they are doing with my application is certainly a mystery. by the way, despite the relative proximity I can in no way recommend BA as a waiting room for Brazil. The one guy I met was vaguely related to the stunning pictures, did not do what we agreed, did what he did very quickly and wanted more money to do more. The prices are high (I was quoted today as high as 300k pesos, almost 300usd, and that’s with a Brazilian WhatsApp number.) And this idea that Buenos Aires looks anything like Paris is like standing in front of the ymca on rua de Lapa and remarking what a lovely colonial city Rio is. Rsrs Saudades de Brasil😢