Ever yourself experience violence in Brazil from a Grindr guy (wanting money) or GP (wanting more)?

[Canadianbtmguy]

 

In a trip report of Africa I am writing in the Africa forum,( www.gayguides.com/topic/72912-bottoming-in-sub-saharan-africa/#findComment-473447  ) I describe a Grindr guy who only afterwards decided he was a “sex worker” and demanded crazy sums; I refused, after which he refused to leave and attempted to physically restrain me from seeking help. 

While I have seen the horror stories of killings in Brazil described here and elsewhere I am more interested in the personal experiences of forum members. 

 

I have invited, (I estimate) a couple of hundred GPs to my apartments and a few dozen (free) Grindr guys, and there have been very very few who tried to change the financial arrangements and none who resorted to violence.

 

Have I just been lucky or can we say this is just not the custom and practice? (I would like to compartmentalize what happened in Mozambique as something not to worry about in Brazil)

 

N.B. PLEASE responses only from guys who invite men over their apartments/go to their place.  This is not at all the place for guys who meet only in the sauna to proclaim the safety and superiority of meeting in the sauna only. Again, please the question asked is of any violence you HAVE experienced, NOT violence you may have avoided by sticking to the saunas.

 

I appreciate in advance to sauna-only guys from refraining from doing so. 😎

 

 

[Latbear4blk]

I suffered a couple of extortions attempts in the US, by American escorts, and once I was robbed by a guy I picked up from a bar in Washington DC. I never had an issue in Brazil, other than GPs begging for money through WhatsApp, or asking me not in a nice way to put down photos I published of them. 

[johnnyboi23]

On my last trip to Brazil I was robbed by one of my regular GP's. I planned a normal meetup at my Airbnb, and before the program started he came at me with a knife and took some of my things. I thought I knew him very well since we've met a couple of times, so I let my guard down with him and kind of saw him as boyfriend material. The only violent thing he did in that moment was slap my phone out of my hand and threaten me with the knife after he took my wallet. At the end of the day the police was able to get my stuff back since I've been to the GP's house several times and could guide them.

After this experience, I don't know if I could even go back to Rio. I'll never forget the look on his face when I saw him arrested at the police station. Never get too comfortable with GP's or let them know personal things about you. You will regret it!

 

[Travelingguy]

I am sure that the sex workers are victims of violence as well.  I am sorry that happened to you, and I am glad that you were not hurt physically. 

[Canadianbtmguy]

7 hours ago, johnnyboi23 said:

On my last trip to Brazil I was robbed by one of my regular GP's. I planned a normal meetup at my Airbnb, and before the program started he came at me with a knife and took some of my things. I thought I knew him very well since we've met a couple of times, so I let my guard down with him and kind of saw him as boyfriend material. The only violent thing he did in that moment was slap my phone out of my hand and threaten me with the knife after he took my wallet. At the end of the day the police was able to get my stuff back since I've been to the GP's house several times and could guide them.

After this experience, I don't know if I could even go back to Rio. I'll never forget the look on his face when I saw him arrested at the police station. Never get too comfortable with GP's or let them know personal things about you. You will regret it!

 

Wow, what a disappointment, especially because you thought you knew him. Glad he didn’t get away with it, although much of the harm to you, I imagine, was beyond the actual possessions

[hornyfrog]

Even if you’ve seen a GP around for years or hired him before, don’t assume that means zero risk. The less time you spend here, the less you’ll know. I know of both tourists and residents who let their guards down and ended up robbed, threatened, drugged, or even injured in their apartments in Brazil.

It’s not super-common — and it’s reported less here when it’s two men involved than when a woman garota de programa robs a male client — but it happens enough to stay alert. Filing a police report, an arrest, or even a sauna ban doesn’t always make someone vanish — the same faces can reappear later.

Saunas at least provide some accountability. Outside of that, lock up your valuables and never assume that past good encounters guarantee the next one will be safe.

[Latbear4blk]

This could happen anywhere in the world. I smell xenophobia. 

[floridarob]

This happened to me decades ago in Brazil—I had a camera stolen by someone I knew. A few days later, I ran into him on the street and asked why he did it. His answer was simple: he needed money.

I dragged him to the police station myself. He laughed the whole way, certain nothing would happen. But after I spoke with a detective (and a little money changed hands), they discovered he already had a warrant. The look on his face when they put him in handcuffs and led him to a cell was priceless. The detective even asked if I wanted him roughed up later—I said no. I didn’t hate him, I was just disappointed, because we had known each other for a long time.

I’ll never forget what a Brazilian who had lived in Miami once told me outside of Corujina’s: “Don’t trust anyone completely. Always stay sharp and lock everything up. No matter how much you think you can trust them, desperation can push people to do things you wouldn’t expect....They've sucked cock for money after all”

Those words have stayed with me everywhere I travel.

[Latbear4blk]

15 minutes ago, floridarob said:

I’ll never forget what a Brazilian who had lived in Miami once told me outside of Corujina’s: “Don’t trust anyone completely. Always stay sharp and lock everything up. No matter how much you think you can trust them, desperation can push people to do things you wouldn’t expect....They've sucked cock for money after all”

I agree with that 100%. But is has nothing to do with nationality but with poverty. 

[floridarob]

2 hours ago, Latbear4blk said:

I agree with that 100%. But is has nothing to do with nationality but with poverty. 

 

3 hours ago, floridarob said:

Those words have stayed with me everywhere I travel.

Is why I think about it no matter where I am...

[Canadianbtmguy]

Undoubtedly a relevant factor, but I would not put it all down to poverty. Also "it can happen anywhere" is a bit conclusory, as of course it can, but the question is how often it, in fact, does.

Other factors, including culture also play a role, in terms of what sort of behaviors are acceptable to resort to when one is poor. Variance can be seen among countries at high wealth levels (Yes, it "can" happen in Japan, but much more commonly "does" in the US) down to the lowest (I am in Rwanda and I was in Mozambique, which both have extremely safe streets, almost certainly more so than Rio or El Salvador, at much higher income levels.) Although street crime in Maputo is unacceptable, Scamming seems culturally acceptable, even among Mozambicans themselves, whereas Rwandans, even given an easy opening for a scam don't seem to take it. In some countries at similar income levels, baksheesh is customary, others it is criminal.