Seoul Hotman Gay Massage: problem

[12is12]

https://hotman.co.kr/ 

Their website is very clear - actually blunt, for a discretion-prefering society. Setting appointment via telegram was very efficient, given the english-speaking administrator.

I set the appointment for 17:30, but warned there r uber and traffic prblms and that I would update him accordingly. "OK, no prblm" was his response. Indeed we had to postpone again and again, each time - "ok" and a new hour set.

However, when I arrived at 18:25, he said my appointment would b only 40 mnts instead of 60 bcs I m late (bumping against a 19:10 appointment).

I said "ok, but I'll pay two thirds accordingly". He raised his voice, wouldnt explain why he didnt say so in advance, and demanded full payment.

I left, him running after me in the street, shouting about money and "f--k u".

FYI )-:

[Keithambrose]

36 minutes ago, 12is12 said:

https://hotman.co.kr/ 

Their website is very clear - actually blunt, for a discretion-prefering society. Setting appointment via telegram was very efficient, given the english-speaking administrator.

I set the appointment for 17:30, but warned there r uber and traffic prblms and that I would update him accordingly. "OK, no prblm" was his response. Indeed we had to postpone again and again, each time - "ok" and a new hour set.

However, when I arrived at 18:25, he said my appointment would b only 40 mnts instead of 60 bcs I m late (bumping against a 19:10 appointment).

I said "ok, but I'll pay two thirds accordingly". He raised his voice, wouldnt explain why he didnt say so in advance, and demanded full payment.

I left, him running after me in the street, shouting about money and "f--k u".

FYI )-:

Quite a success, then!

[floridarob]

21 hours ago, 12is12 said:

I left, him running after me in the street, shouting about money and "f--k u".

Reading this, I thought it was a post by @Olddaddy 😳

[Keithambrose]

On 5/18/2026 at 1:27 PM, floridarob said:

Reading this, I thought it was a post by @Olddaddy 😳

Not with running involved!

[PeterRS]

An issue made in the OP is one everyone should consider. If an appointment is made to suit an individual client, it is as much the responsibility of that client to be on time as it is the service provider. Regular messaging updates about bad traffic is hardly an excuse, the more so when the appointment time is at rush hour. And this is as true in Seoul where the traffic is horrendous, as it is in many other major Asian cities. Surely the OP could have got himself to a coffee shop, hotel or at least somewhere hear the massage spa in advance so as to be on time for the appointment he himself had made? Trusting what is assumed to be an agreement by a phone operator in Seoul about bad traffic is, as the client discovered, of little use.

To offer to pay only two thirds when it was the client who was late was demeaning, especially in a very Confucian society. And then just to walk out even more so. 

[macaroni21]

7 hours ago, PeterRS said:

it is as much the responsibility of that client to be on time as it is the service provider..... To offer to pay only two thirds when it was the client who was late was demeaning, especially in a very Confucian society. And then just to walk out even more so. 

+1

[caeron]

Seriously rude. An hour late, and cheap.

[12is12]

Guys

I wasnt late in the normal sense of setting a time and arriving late.

I told him in advance, per driver's warning, about being late; continuously updating him.

Each time he set a new hour.

At no time did he say - well now u'll b arriving late, so ur session will shorten.

Had he said that, I would have cancelled bcs of traffic 40 minutes in advance....

[PeterRS]

On 5/26/2026 at 11:22 AM, PeterRS said:

An issue made in the OP is one everyone should consider. If an appointment is made to suit an individual client, it is as much the responsibility of that client to be on time as it is the service provider.

I notice @Keithambrose gave this post a "sad" emoji. His personal opinion and to which he is perfectly entitled. But if anyone has a responsbility in his profession for being on time, I imagine it would be the one he practices. I am reasonably sure that judges have somewhat strong language for lawyers being late for court!  

[PeterRS]

On 5/28/2026 at 4:39 AM, 12is12 said:

I wasnt late in the normal sense of setting a time and arriving late . . . 

WIth all due respect there is no "normal" time of being late. We are either on time or we are late. Being in a foreign country many of us have a tendency to believe that what goes for "being late" with constant updates on timing is the same as in our own country. We also assume that the English language in all its complexity is as well understood as we think it is. Neither is!

Then there is the traffic issue. I do not know how @12is12 planned to arrive by his appointed hour - the one he proposed at the outset. Did he consider first using Seoul's excellent subway system at least close to his destination? DId he just assume that the horrendous traffic in the city which he must have observed particularly as rush hour arrives would merit a car ride and still enable him to arrive on time? Did he consider leaving earlier?

Did he consider that Korean society has a very different set of manners and obligations compared to those in his home country? Clearly not, for he would then definitely not have walked out. Sorry, but I still regard his actions as unbecoming and rude by any tourist in any gay establishment in any foreign city, particularly an Asian one.

[caeron]

 

I agree. Keeping someone updated isn't enough. You have made them sit around and wait for you. They have wasted their time because you didn't show when you agreed to. You consumed their working hours and then tried to get a cut rate price at the end. Anywhere else after you'd booked the time, if you didn't cancel with sufficient warning, you'd be expected to pay the full amount and get nothing.  You booked a block of time and didn't use it. The gentleman tried to work with you to the limit of his ability and then you stiffed him.

It isn't his fault that you made no rational plan to arrive on time, its yours. He's just the victim of your tardiness.

The next appointment wasn't any of your business, and he couldn't warn you because he had no way of knowing how late you were going to be.

This just shows no respect for him and his time.

Courtesy would be to send him the money now and apologize.