SolaceSoul

(1) Racism isn’t a zero-sum game, where only one marginalized group gets shorted while every other one wins a medal. It’s quite perplexing that this is how you view it works. (2) Racism isn’t measured by who wants to fuck someone or give them a blowjob. Plenty of racists during the slavery and the Jim Crow periods in the American South sought sexual pleasure from black people. And to this day, some people, gay or straight, with overt or covert racist attitudes and beliefs will have sex with and even partner up with a person of another race. I know of several white gay guys who sleep with and date black, brown or Asian men and are racist fuckheads.

When I wrote this, I expected at least one #NotAllWhiteGuys comment. Your individual tastes in men are duly noted. I did, however, say “many of the posters here” (and it may even be implied that si meant “most”), but I did not say “all”. BTW, percentage-wise, with over 80% of its population from African descent, Salvador da Bahia has WAYYYYY many more people of African descent than either New Orleans or Houston (or for that matter, Atlanta, DC, Chicago or New York City). I didn’t quite understand the purpose of that comment, but it’s otobably not worth debating it at all, as it was presumably innocuous. https://medium.com/atlantico-online/salvador-the-most-african-city-in-the-world-b93673215231

I will add — though anyone that has followed my posts surely already knew this about me! — that I also unapologetically prefer men of color — especially black (of African descent) and brown (of Latino or Pacific Islander descent) men. I make no excuses or explanations for what I am physically, sexually and emotionally attracted to, and don’t need to. There are more than enough men of ALL colors all around the world that prefer white men. You oppressed white guys will manage just fine, somehow.

As an African-American with all of the messy mixed race that comes with being black in America can have, I will respectfully disagree with the bolder part of your statement. Most black Americans are knowledgeable and accepting of the wide-casting net of the African diaspora that was created by the African slavery trade. Are there a minority of ig pants who aren’t? Sure. However, the overarching dispute usually isn’t that Brazilians, South Americans, Latin Americans or West Indians aren’t black — rather, that their experiences are not the same as black Americans. That’s a different argument, altogether — which can be both right and wrong.

What I know about you, Tom, I like a lot, so don’t take this defensively, as many people do when the subject of race is brought up. There’s far too much to unpack in your post so for now, I will just focus on the above part. Perhaps you overlooked all of the posters who have affirmatively come out and said that they prefer white (or in some cases, coded as “blonde”, “blue eyed”, “European”, “Nordic”, “Germanic”, even “Mediterranean”, and the famous, tired “boy next door” or “All-American” trope). Parisrio was one that comes to mind, but there are others. And the preference of many posters here for the kinds of guys in places like Porto Alegre (a town in an area with predominantly European looking people) — as well as the countless photos posted of the whiter-featured garotos of Brazil, are even more evidence of this preference. Yes, clients and posters focus on what THEY think is “HOT”. The point is that for many, what they think is hot almost excludes men with African / black features (excluding, of course, the stereotypically legendary huge black Mandingo dicks). Now, I’m not suggesting that it is racist or even bad to prefer a certain type to date or have sex with. Like what you like. Fuck who you want, as long as they are willing and legal. But please, be man enough to own it. Don’t say you like all “hot” guys and then just leave out a huge swath of the black or indigenous (and obviously mixed with black or indigenous) men that make up the vast majority of brasileiros.

Because Salvador and the entire Bahia is predominantly black people. It should be plainly clear by now that many of the posters here aren’t “into” that.

Understood. However, you have almost 20,000 posts at this forum, and more than a fair number of them are commenting about Brazilian pay boy saunas and/or South / Latin American rent boys. Why persistently remark (especially when the remarks are usually critical or snarky) about something that you’ve admittedly never experienced yourself in 40 years of travel — unless you are just here to troll?

If this is the case, then you were going to the saunas that don’t have rentboys, of which there are plenty in Rio and in other Brazilian cities. .

Rounds in that same area was THE hustler bar of all hustler bars. No scrubs were allowed! RIP, Rounds. Minorities in the City ALWAYS knew he was a POS. 9/11 saved his career, because New Yorkers were done with him before the tragedy occurred. It’s good to know that the rest of the world finally knows what we knew over 25 years ago.

Suckrates, serious question: Have you ever been to Brazil?

There aren’t anywhere near as many bars as there used to be. The Monster? Pfffft. Maybe on its Latin stripper night downstairs. Yeah, we would never fight over men.

We clearly have VERY different tastes in not only trade, but men altogether. I wouldn’t do underage (or underage appearing) boys or young men. BTW, I should’ve also mentioned that Ghouliani successfully drove out the black and Latino street scene in Manhattan and most now gentrified parts of Brooklyn and Queens. Times Square had plenty of hustler and trade spots like peep shows and gogo dancer spots that were mostly black and brown men. Although other mainstays like The Gaiety, Stella’s and Show Palace were shut down as well. The Port Authority used to be trade central, but that’s been cleaned up as well.

I’m not old enough to know the glory days of the 70s, and didn’t hit NYC streets and clubs until I was a teen in the mid to late 80s. But it all pretty much came crashing down by mid-1995, when Ghouliani Disneyfied Times Square, and by the early 2000s, the West Village and surrounding hoods’ street scenes were dead.

Sorry I hit a nerve. The need to rescue usually says more about the person trying to rescue than the Rapunzel / Damsel in Distress / Pretty Woman that the person is trying to rescue. Co-dependency is the term used in addiction circles. It’s okay. You defensively think I’m judging or attacking you, but I’m just identifying what it is. Just own it. We all have our crosses to bear.

2010 - 2011? You missed the Golden Age of Street Trade in New York City by about 20 years. You can thank Ghouliani for the destruction of street life and club life in NYC. If you didn’t experience this, then you have no idea what a gold standard is.

Oh, Missy Ann. You still suffer from Captain Save-A-Ho Syndrome? Don’t try to save trade. Trade doesn’t want to be saved. Just enjoy trade for what trade is. Please note: this rule also applies to strippers, escorts, gogo boys, masseurs, sauna boys, streetwalkers, hustlers, porn stars, webcam models and any and all sex workers.

As an “ethnic” guy who started going to gay bars in the USA and Europe pretty early in life, I’d like to respond. “Oh, is that what that was?”

Oh, but I DO have conversation with my big muscleheads. We discuss gym, sports, soccer, fast cars, luxury cars, athletic gear, training, supplements, the beach, travel, dieting, post-diet foods, competitions, The Rock movies, Vin Diesel movies and Jason Statham movies. It’s like a script. Maybe he’s born with it. Maybe it’s Maybelline.

Hey! Nothing wrong with brainless muscle hunks. Some of us love them big and stupid. If I wanted conversation, I have good Judy girlfriends for that. (That being said, the two in the above photo do absolutely nothing for me at all — too blonde, too pale, and a little too skinny for my tastes. But to each his own. Viva la difference!)

Not that anyone asked, but I agree that it depends on the person, the parties involved, the place, the time and the circumstances. I have been hiring almost as long as I’ve been messing with guys (the former started in my very early 20s out of college, the latter started in my teens). A few years later, I was working and traveling internationally, and hiring as well as just casual dating / sexing non-hires. Often times, the lines were so blurred, that it was hard to distinguish between what was a date and what was a hire — whether in or out of the USA. One of my all-time favorites was a “straight” guy I met in NYC through a connect who very briefly advertised as a masseur for women. First time, he came over, we both had a great time and connected, and I paid his regular asking massage price. Then, for about once a month for maybe 3 years, he would call me and just want to come over and chill overnight — which always meant sex and sleep. He never asked me for anything else, and I’d only hear from him when he wanted to do this. Our relationship was nothing more, nothing less. Like Tomcal says above about his friend Florida Rob, I also often prefer overnights when I travel. Whenever I travel to Rio or Santo Domingo in particular, I have a few that are waiting to do overnights with me. As much as they may seem to enjoy it as much as I do, I always provide them with a nice, parting presente / regalo in the AM, because (1) I can more than afford it, (2) they can certainly use it, and (3) I prefer doing it. I don’t and never have viewed these exchanges as some sort of measure of someone's unattractiveness, or unloveableness, or inability to love or get a “real relationship” (whatever that is). I have had more than enough false starts at “real love” to know that NOT hurting and actually enjoying yourself feels SO much better, is much better for the soul, and is much more therapeutic. We all know the argument, “but for the money, would they still be there?” I can guarantee you that this question can also be used for subject matter other than money, such as physical appearance. For those who are considered to be nice looking, or for those who are very physically built — but for your looks or body, would some of the men or women that you have dated or met still be interested? If some of the escorts or sauna boys that we pursue had lost their looks or their nice builds — or for those into this, their ability to get or maintain an erection — would we also still be interested? Why would we expect others to behave so saintly and magnanimously when we ourselves have our own selfish, prurient interests in people? A bit hypocritical, is it not?

This also applies to men (and women) who perceive themselves as being much more physically attractive than others actually do. Entitlement issues, indeed.

What’s ironic is that most people who view me personally think that my life, experiences and travels are pretty exciting. But to some, I suppose that my life is just and ho-him mundane because I don’t fuck raw or snort drugs up my nose. This is why you should not live your life to please or entertain others. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

This thread is going in so many directions, but Cunanan was only a moderately attractively young gay guy-cum-escort and wasn’t able to snag the coveted trophy boy status that the Adonis boys with model looks and sculpted physiques in and around South Beach and Fire Island would get from rich older sugar daddies. This D-level status infuriated him. He wanted to be part of a club that restricted him because of his sheer mediocrity. His envy and desire for entry into a world of more that was denied to him seemed to be his motivation— well, that and being plain batshit kray kray.

But that’s just it: no one asked you. No one cares how you live your life except you. Do what works for you.

Santa Monica and La Brea, where the street trade, tranny hookers and cruisers in cars’ worlds would collide at the Carl’s Jr. 42nd and 8th Ave., or the West Side Highway and Christopher Street. The days when there was a Krystal’s on Peachtree in midtown Atlanta. Areas around various federal statues and libraries in DC. Collins Avenue in Miami Beach. Lower Westheimer and Elgin in Houston. Behind the Cedar Springs clubs to Maple in Dallas. Some downtown Chicago streets whose names I already forgot. Even St. Catherine in Montreal. Yes, Ms. Ann, those days are gone. May these old hot spots and trade-laden blocks Rest In Peace. International travel is the closest thing to this scene, now. (Sorry that your thread was diverted, Tom!)