The good news ( or bad news depends how you look at it lol ) is that Thai's can't understand us the falangs either.

 

On 10/23/2023 at 7:49 PM, scott456 said:

Ask your Thai boys if they can or care to really understand Farangs. 

 

1 hour ago, Boy69 said:

The good news ( or bad news depends how you look at it lol ) is that Thai's can't understand us the falangs either.

🙂

Boy69 is spot-on. There were times when P and I stared at each other with total incomprehension in our early years together.

Has anyone read "Thailand Fever" by Chris Pirazzi? It is about relationships with Thai women but I found it very helpful at those times, particularly since the text is translated into Thai and so the book can be shared with our friends.

And here's a Thai word, a concept perhaps, that needs to be understood...."gatanyuu". No exact English equivalent. Posters who have experience of ltrs may have views on it.

if we keep returning and returning , Thais must be doing something right. You tickle them , they laugh, you pinch them , they scream etc...

6 hours ago, vinapu said:

if we keep returning and returning , Thais must be doing something right. You tickle them , they laugh, you pinch them , they scream etc...

You pay them, they disappear!

2 hours ago, Keithambrose said:

You pay them, they disappear!

That was Cambodian !

15 hours ago, Londoner said:

And here's a Thai word, a concept perhaps, that needs to be understood...."gatanyuu".

@Londoner      Can you explain 'gatanyuu'?  A Google search only brings up a comic character. 

On 10/22/2023 at 11:04 PM, PeterRS said:

So why could she not have told me this before? I'll never understand!

Why?  She doesn't like you.  😉

8 hours ago, CurtisD said:

@Londoner      Can you explain 'gatanyuu'?  A Google search only brings up a comic character. 

(ความ)กตัญญู. The nearest English word is "gratitude" but that lacks the Thai cultural nuance. My Google search on "katanyu" turned up a Bangkok Post article about it entitled Katanyu Complex

That Bangkok Post article (mentioned above) is really interesting reading. It helps me understand why when my Isaan friends return from their province they invariably have no money left.

One thing I will never understand is how to tell the difference between a genuine request for needed funds, from when I am being used as an ATM. Any suggestions?

On 10/26/2023 at 2:35 AM, CurtisD said:

@Londoner      Can you explain 'gatanyuu'?  A Google search only brings up a comic character. 

It refers to the sort of love, affection and (importantly) sense of debt that a Thai feels for his parents, or perhaps for a special teacher at school or university who has guided him/her.

Or for  a falang who has helped him or her, perhaps changing his/her life for the better.   

11 hours ago, Marc K said:

 

One thing I will never understand is how to tell the difference between a genuine request for needed funds, from when I am being used as an ATM. Any suggestions?

we are used as ATM whether request is genuine or not but I get what do you mean. In reality,  unless we are deeply involved in guy' s life we can't say it with certainty.

Request may be most genuine but if made to 26 farangs  and if even only half of them contribute , at one point it may turn to  just money maker when guy needs 10000 and received 22000.

My only advice in such a cases will be to go with your gut. No sense worrying if we are milked or not as likely we never learn the truth. On another hand we should remember that relatively small outlay from our pocket may help guy  immensely. On third hand though we need to learn when to stop as almost without exception if you help once , another request will follow, form boy and his friend known to you who learned that you are so helpful.

Like my grandmother used to say " if you have soft heart you must also have hard ass"

His grandma is in hospital for a heart surgery.