The dangers of Colombia

[neyger]

This post is not meant to scare anyone or discourage you from visiting Colombia. But it is a reminder that Colombia is still a third world country. With great people, and a few bad apples. You should take certain precautions when visiting Colombia.
I still think Colombia is a great country, with friendly people, beautiful nature and handsome men, but you should never let your guard down. TinT, this is not Thailand.

A few months ago I was visiting Medellin. On Wednesday night I was having drinks at the Chiquita bar in Parque Lleras with a paisa friend. I met an American gentleman, let’s call him James (not his real name). James is a solo traveler in his late forties. It was his first trip to Colombia. He was accompanied by a handsome Colombian hunk he picked up on Grindr. We started talking, mostly in English, since James only spoke a few words of Spanish. Later that night we went to a nearby nightclub called Premium. At the end of the party we exchanged WhatsApp. It is customary (at least among my paisa and veneco friends) to create a WhatsApp group and everyone sends a message when they get home safely. Everyone got home safely, a normal night in Medellin.

I had no contact with James for the next days. Fast forward to the following Monday. Early in the morning I received a phone call. James. He sounded in distress. English is not my native language and it was difficult to understand what he was saying. Since he stayed only a few blocks from my house in Laureles, I told him I would meet him at his place. When I arrived, I could tell right away that he was not doing well. His face was swollen, he had a black eye, and he looked completely miserable.

This is what he told me about what happened: 

On Saturday around noon, he was contacted on Grindr by a guy named Alejandro. It was a empty new profile, but Alejandro shared his details and photos in a private chat. Alejandro was a 28-year-old handsome university student. He said he was into older men, but that he also needed some money to pay the rent. They moved the conversation to WhatsApp, discussed the price and agreed to meet at a shopping mall that same day at 6pm. He went to the mall and they had a drink at one of the bars. He had a good feeling about the guy. He looked exactly like in the photos, he even wore the same clothes. He was polite, smiled a lot and seemed at ease. This whole conversation was done via google translate. He did mention that he didn’t have a cedula (identity card) and asked if that was a problem. He had lost it the day before, but he had some paper that was supposed to prove his identity. James didn't make a big deal about it because it was obvious that he wasn't underage. James called an Uber and they drove to his airBnB. His airBnB didn’t have security, which James wanted for privacy. During the ride to the airBnB, Alejandro was nervous and texting on his phone.

Once at the Airbnb, they chatted and had a beer. Alejandro still seemed very nervous and kept texting. He said a friend was writing to him about something that happened at the university. James didn't think much of it and went to the bathroom. That was the last time he saw Alejandro.

When he came back from the bathroom, Alejandro was gone and there were two rough guys with guns pointed at him. They beat him up, gave him drugs and made him give them everything. His money, his phone, his credit and debit cards. He obeyed. He gave them everything hoping they would leave. They didn’t. Instead, they put him in a car and drove him to a location in a neighbourhood called "12 de Octubre" (this was reconstructed from his Google timeline). Once at that location, more guys arrived, beat him up even worse, threatened to cut off his dick and fingers if he didn’t tell the truth. It was a complete nightmare. He had to give them the codes to his cards. He had to show them everything he had on his phone, including his banking apps. The kidnappers were snorting drugs the whole time and were very tense. For at least the next 24 hours, the kidnappers plundered his bank account and credit cards, withdrawing cash and buying expensive items. They forced him to take more drugs, and his memories of that day are blurry.

He woke up, lying on the sidewalk in a street in the Robledo neighbourhood, with his passport and Airbnb keys in his pocket. He had no idea how long he had been lying there. Still dizzy and confused, he took a taxi to the Airbnb. Once inside the Airbnb, he remembered that he had hidden his laptop in the oven (since there was no safe) and forgot to tell the kidnappers. He had WhatsApp on the laptop and contacted the only English-speaking person he knew in Medellin, who happened to be me.

When I arrived, he didn’t want to go to the hospital. We checked his banking apps on the computer (and blocked his cards) and when he saw what had happened to his savings, he was devastated. I didn’t feel confident enough in Spanish to explain his story to the police, so I contacted a bilingual friend and the three of us went to the police to file a report. To be honest, the police were cooperative and compassionate. We filed a ‘denuncia’ and gave them as much information as we could. I thought it was strange that they gave his passport back, but according to the police, it’s a well-known tactic: the kidnappers hope that the victim will be ashamed and/or terrified and leave the country as soon as possible without reporting it. The police also told me that this is not specifically aimed at the LGBT community, but that it happens on all dating apps. 

For obvious reasons, James didn’t want to stay at that airBnB any longer. I loaned him some money to buy a phone and pay for his hotel and living expenses (which he later paid back in full). We saw each other regularly over the next few days. He was still in shock and wouldn’t leave his hotel room. I eventually accompanied him to the airport to catch his flight home.

James was able to get some of the money back, but he lost thousands of dollars (he asked me not to reveal the full amount). He is now feeling better, although he is still in therapy to recover from PTSD. He hasn't heard anything from the Colombian police yet.

Posted with permission of 'James'  

This post serves as a warning and to learn from, not to start a victim blaming spree. James knows that he made mistakes. Let's keep this civil please.

[neyger]

In my opinion, there were minor and big red flags that James missed: 

• Alejandro contacted him, not the other way round.
• He used a new profile, without any information.
• He wore the exact same clothes in his photos with the same haircut, as if they were taken that same day.
• No cedula, a huge red flag. 
• Alejandro acting very nervous when James invited him to his airBnB. 

Other tips to remain safe: 

• 'No dar papaya', don't flash with fancy stuff, dress down & blend in. Keep low key. Don't brag about how much you earn or how much savings you have to the people you meet.
• Be very careful with the apps. Meet in public and watch for red flags. Use your instincts. If something feels odd, just walk away.
• Nightlife in Colombia can be a lot of fun, but there is a danger in it. Don't get drunk, don't do drugs. Go in a group, with people you can trust and who will look out for you. Look out for them.
• It helps a lot if you speak (basic) Spanish.
• The more you know about the guy, the better. If he shares his (real) social media with you (instagram, facebook,..), that is definitely a plus. 
• I would not meet at his location.
• If you rent an Airbnb, make sure that it has security. 
• Use a love motel if you don't want to bring him to your room.
• Don't walk alone in empty streets or in bad neighbourhoods, take an uber at night. Always be aware of your surroundings, even more so when using your phone. 
• Take an old smartphone with you and keep your fancy phone at the hotel. Only install the apps you will use (no banking apps).
• Only take the cash you need when leaving the hotel/AirBnB. If you take a debit card with you, don't charge it with a lot of money (I use a 'wise' card for that purpose). 
• Be careful with ATMs, only use the ones in shopping malls.
• Put a 20 mil or 50 mil banknote somewhere in a separate pocket (your 'take me home' money).

I met a lot of guys in Colombia and never had a problem.. but one mistake can have dire consequences. 
 

[12is12]

1 - thank u for both posts.

2 - I suggest pinning the security safety list.

3 - I'm 67 y/o with gringo looks. I visited colombia 5 times; in two of them I rented a car for a week. No problems. 

3 - side issue: according to conventional criteria, colombia is not a 3rd world country. 

4 - I wonder if there's data on such incidents, comparing Medellin, SP, Mexican cities, LA, Moscow, Johanesberg, Istanbul, etc......

[neyger]

1 hour ago, 12is12 said:

3 - I'm 67 y/o with gringo looks. I visited colombia 5 times; in two of them I rented a car for a week. No problems. 

I have also had no problems in eight visits to Colombia, sometimes for extended periods. And I certainly admit that I didn't always follow my own safety list. 

1 hour ago, 12is12 said:

3 - side issue: according to conventional criteria, colombia is not a 3rd world country. 

4 - I wonder if there's data on such incidents, comparing Medellin, SP, Mexican cities, LA, Moscow, Johanesberg, Istanbul, etc......

I don't know if there is data about this specific kind of incident. What worried me was that the police weren't the least bit surprised and seemed to be familiar with this modus operandi.

[joizy]

5 hours ago, neyger said:

This post is not meant to scare anyone or discourage you from visiting Colombia. But it is a reminder that Colombia is still a third world country. With great people, and a few bad apples. You should take certain precautions when visiting Colombia.
I still think Colombia is a great country, with friendly people, beautiful nature and handsome men, but you should never let your guard down. TinT, this is not Thailand.

A few months ago I was visiting Medellin. On Wednesday night I was having drinks at the Chiquita bar in Parque Lleras with a paisa friend. I met an American gentleman, let’s call him James (not his real name). James is a solo traveler in his late forties. It was his first trip to Colombia. He was accompanied by a handsome Colombian hunk he picked up on Grindr. We started talking, mostly in English, since James only spoke a few words of Spanish. Later that night we went to a nearby nightclub called Premium. At the end of the party we exchanged WhatsApp. It is customary (at least among my paisa and veneco friends) to create a WhatsApp group and everyone sends a message when they get home safely. Everyone got home safely, a normal night in Medellin.

I had no contact with James for the next days. Fast forward to the following Monday. Early in the morning I received a phone call. James. He sounded in distress. English is not my native language and it was difficult to understand what he was saying. Since he stayed only a few blocks from my house in Laureles, I told him I would meet him at his place. When I arrived, I could tell right away that he was not doing well. His face was swollen, he had a black eye, and he looked completely miserable.

This is what he told me about what happened: 

On Saturday around noon, he was contacted on Grindr by a guy named Alejandro. It was a empty new profile, but Alejandro shared his details and photos in a private chat. Alejandro was a 28-year-old handsome university student. He said he was into older men, but that he also needed some money to pay the rent. They moved the conversation to WhatsApp, discussed the price and agreed to meet at a shopping mall that same day at 6pm. He went to the mall and they had a drink at one of the bars. He had a good feeling about the guy. He looked exactly like in the photos, he even wore the same clothes. He was polite, smiled a lot and seemed at ease. This whole conversation was done via google translate. He did mention that he didn’t have a cedula (identity card) and asked if that was a problem. He had lost it the day before, but he had some paper that was supposed to prove his identity. James didn't make a big deal about it because it was obvious that he wasn't underage. James called an Uber and they drove to his airBnB. His airBnB didn’t have security, which James wanted for privacy. During the ride to the airBnB, Alejandro was nervous and texting on his phone.

Once at the Airbnb, they chatted and had a beer. Alejandro still seemed very nervous and kept texting. He said a friend was writing to him about something that happened at the university. James didn't think much of it and went to the bathroom. That was the last time he saw Alejandro.

When he came back from the bathroom, Alejandro was gone and there were two rough guys with guns pointed at him. They beat him up, gave him drugs and made him give them everything. His money, his phone, his credit and debit cards. He obeyed. He gave them everything hoping they would leave. They didn’t. Instead, they put him in a car and drove him to a location in a neighbourhood called "12 de Octubre" (this was reconstructed from his Google timeline). Once at that location, more guys arrived, beat him up even worse, threatened to cut off his dick and fingers if he didn’t tell the truth. It was a complete nightmare. He had to give them the codes to his cards. He had to show them everything he had on his phone, including his banking apps. The kidnappers were snorting drugs the whole time and were very tense. For at least the next 24 hours, the kidnappers plundered his bank account and credit cards, withdrawing cash and buying expensive items. They forced him to take more drugs, and his memories of that day are blurry.

He woke up, lying on the sidewalk in a street in the Robledo neighbourhood, with his passport and Airbnb keys in his pocket. He had no idea how long he had been lying there. Still dizzy and confused, he took a taxi to the Airbnb. Once inside the Airbnb, he remembered that he had hidden his laptop in the oven (since there was no safe) and forgot to tell the kidnappers. He had WhatsApp on the laptop and contacted the only English-speaking person he knew in Medellin, who happened to be me.

When I arrived, he didn’t want to go to the hospital. We checked his banking apps on the computer (and blocked his cards) and when he saw what had happened to his savings, he was devastated. I didn’t feel confident enough in Spanish to explain his story to the police, so I contacted a bilingual friend and the three of us went to the police to file a report. To be honest, the police were cooperative and compassionate. We filed a ‘denuncia’ and gave them as much information as we could. I thought it was strange that they gave his passport back, but according to the police, it’s a well-known tactic: the kidnappers hope that the victim will be ashamed and/or terrified and leave the country as soon as possible without reporting it. The police also told me that this is not specifically aimed at the LGBT community, but that it happens on all dating apps. 

For obvious reasons, James didn’t want to stay at that airBnB any longer. I loaned him some money to buy a phone and pay for his hotel and living expenses (which he later paid back in full). We saw each other regularly over the next few days. He was still in shock and wouldn’t leave his hotel room. I eventually accompanied him to the airport to catch his flight home.

James was able to get some of the money back, but he lost thousands of dollars (he asked me not to reveal the full amount). He is now feeling better, although he is still in therapy to recover from PTSD. He hasn't heard anything from the Colombian police yet.

Posted with permission of 'James'  

This post serves as a warning and to learn from, not to start a victim blaming spree. James knows that he made mistakes. Let's keep this civil please.

Thank you for helping him and sharing this with us. It was a horrible situation and I hope James can recover from the trauma. This serves as a good warning for us. Yes, there were red flags, but it’s very easy to miss them when you are being hit on constantly by really hot guys who would otherwise ignore you at home. No judgement on “James”. This could have been any of us.

[macdaddi]

Awful to hear about this, but unsurprising that the police treated this as normal. They are seeing a lot of gringo sex scams these days in Medellín unfortunately. 

A reminder to always find out the variation of the 911 emergency phone number in any country you are visiting.  The correct number for emergency services in Colombia is 123. For Police services it is 112.

[vinapu]

it really may happen everywhere, even if our own countries. Key word is 'may" and truth is in Colombia it did happen.

Lesson for myself  from that is go to Colombia  for sightseeing and for boys keep to safe , even if very far away , Thailand or broadly SE Asia with its safety and well organized industry we are all interested in.

[KeepItReal]

I would venture to say that most guys that meet...companions...have been robbed or will be robbed at some time. My experience has not been as brutal as the one that "James" experienced. In one case the companion stole electronics and left while I was on the phone. In another he stole my "muggers wallet" (the wallet I carry with expired cards and a little cash) on the way out when I went into the kitchen to get him a bottle of water for the road. 

I have a trusted hiring buddy. Whenever I meet a new guy I text him a pic/screen grab of the guy and ask him to check on me after the date. I do the same for him when he hires. 

James did do a few things right, should be said. He did meet the guy in a public place, he did hide valuable electronics and he did not provoke them when things got hairy. 

Be safe out there fellas! 

[vinapu]

1 hour ago, KeepItReal said:

 

I have a trusted hiring buddy. Whenever I meet a new guy I text him a pic/screen grab of the guy and ask him to check on me after the date. I do the same for him when he hires. 

 

very smart idea.

Few readers may recall my story from 2023 when I fell for certain Cambodian Charming Prince , infatuation which  ultimately failed - as described in Jan 2023 report. There was no danger  but after unreasonable request to fly from Phnom Penh to Bangkok on  a separate flights I started to feel suspicious about his intentions  to keep his part of deal and  just in case I send photo of his passport to one of my forum friends. ( I had it as I needed it to buy his ticket to BKK ) 

[asdsrfr]

It sounds like you were a very good friend to your new acquaintance. I have an American friend of many years that lives part of the year in Medellin. He owns his own condo and speaks fluent Spanish. He met a guy on Grindr a few years ago that drugged him and cleaned out his apartment. He is very savvy and cautious and it still happened. I wonder if the Escort Sites are safer?

It may make sense to delete any banking apps from your phone to prevent easy hacking--but if drugged you may become unable to resist giving the kidnappers the required info to reinstall the apps and access your accounts.

I've traveled to Colombia many times and never had a problem but they do happen more there than other places unfortunately.

[12is12]

I humbly submit that Vinapu's lesson to self is exaggerated.

It's still VERY safe to meet guys for sex in clubs brothels etc...

[asdsrfr]

5 hours ago, 12is12 said:

I humbly submit that Vinapu's lesson to self is exaggerated.

It's still VERY safe to meet guys for sex in clubs brothels etc...

I agree. There are those places in Colombia but not as organized or plentiful as Brazil and Thailand. A lot of people use the apps and, or meet people in a regular bar and that’s where you run the greatest risk.

[neyger]

12 hours ago, asdsrfr said:

 I wonder if the Escort Sites are safer?

I do think that sites like mileroticos are safer than the apps.  At the bottom of each profile, you can see the various verifications that have been done,  how old the profile is, whether there have been any complaints in the past, .. 

 

On 5/25/2025 at 2:05 AM, joizy said:

Yes, there were red flags, but it’s very easy to miss them when you are being hit on constantly by really hot guys who would otherwise ignore you at home. No judgement on “James”. This could have been any of us.

That was also the feeling I had.  It could have happened to me. 
I think I will make better use of the love motels in the future.

[floridarob]

I met someone where I live in Mexico.... he said he didn't have his ID on him, sent him home, Too big a red flag to risk whatever.

In Colombia, Brazil and Thailand, I prefer places that take and register  ID's.... then they know we know who they really are.

At the Tarntawan years ago, I offed the DJ from Dream Boys, he wasn't 18 yet.... nothing probably would've come out of it, but they saved me the possibility of whatever. I never thought a gogo bar would have someone available to off that wasn't 18+

[Lucky]

Back in the 90's, underage guys were common in many bars.

[vinapu]

8 hours ago, floridarob said:

 I never thought a gogo bar would have someone available to off that wasn't 18+

you must be still believing in Santa Claus.

While generally you are right it  still warrants to be vigilant. One of our members checked ID in the bar and it age was ok, still hotel security questioned if ID presented is in fact boy's -  which turned out to be spot on.  No 18+ infraction  issue here , boy lost his ID and borrowed somebody else's to secure an off but still....

8 hours ago, Lucky said:

Back in the 90's, underage guys were common in many bars.

they may be gone but smell still lingers and quite a few times upon return immigration wondered sneakily why I travel to Thailand so often and on occasion or two I was even put aside even politely being asked if they can see pictures in my camera, tough luck for them as I generally almost never take pictures of other people , never mind partially dressed.

[vinapu]

23 hours ago, 12is12 said:

I humbly submit that Vinapu's lesson to self is exaggerated.

 

no need to be humble, call me paranoid idiot or whatever, you know me, lol

I still stick to that lesson - any place I visit and I visited quite a few,  where I'm even thinking if I should be concerned about security I consider compromised.

My most cherished moment from Bangkok is not one of many meetings with boys, is 3 am walk through completely deserted streets from Furama Silom to that big white hotel by Saphan Taksin station ( name escaped me, starts with C ). When I get to my room I realized that not even for second   thought of any danger crossed my mind. 

[bkkmfj2648]

4 hours ago, vinapu said:

where I'm even thinking if I should be concerned about security I consider compromised.

Hallelujah!!  I thank you for saying this, as this is also my exact philosophy, and is the primary reason as to why I have not yet ventured to some of these South American countries. 

I truly do not enjoy any experience where the hairs on my neck or arms feel the need to stand up - it is just not worth it, if I cannot relax and enjoy the environment that I am in, - especially as an elderly retiree, with who knows how many years are remaining in my life - why accelerate the eventual end by venturing into a perhaps dangerous situation??  Life is already too short.

[floridarob]

2 minutes ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

is the primary reason as to why I have not yet ventured to some of these South American countries. 

 I had this conversation about how many people don't want to come to Brazil tonight at Point 202 in Rio..... the consensus at the table was, good... hope they stay away, less of a chance of them ruining it for us. 

They might be right, however, it is pretty amazing here, def more sensual and hot sex....and less drama/jealousy   🤷‍♂️

[PeterRS]

4 hours ago, bkkmfj2648 said:

Hallelujah!!  I thank you for saying this, as this is also my exact philosophy, and is the primary reason as to why I have not yet ventured to some of these South American countries. 

I truly do not enjoy any experience where the hairs on my neck or arms feel the need to stand up - it is just not worth it, if I cannot relax and enjoy the environment that I am in, - especially as an elderly retiree, with who knows how many years are remaining in my life - why accelerate the eventual end by venturing into a perhaps dangerous situation??  Life is already too short.

Merely out of curiosity, is sex an essential part of your travelling? I spent a fabulous month travelling around four South American countries and sex was rarely on my mind. It was a fabulous trip and I saw so many natural wonders.

The only time sex came into view was on arrival in Cuzco in Peru. With the short 45 minute flight taking you from sea level to almost 3,500 meters up, everyone told me to do virtually nothing for the first 5 hours while the body acclimatized. For a while I lay on the bed reading, then got bored and hit a couple of apps. Ended up chatting to a delighful student who worked in a bar in the centre of the city in the evenings. He was keen to meet, so the next evening I went for a drink. He was lovely, was obviously well known to the other bar staff and so he came back to my room for a short time. Lovely little interlude!

[floridarob]

4 hours ago, PeterRS said:

Merely out of curiosity, is sex an essential part of your travelling?

Read the room....

 

 

4 hours ago, PeterRS said:

four South American countries and sex was rarely on my mind

How old were you when this took place?

[neyger]

I understand both sides. I suppose it all depends on your risk aversion and your willingness to take extra precautions while traveling.

My paisa friends also don't appreciate the massive influx of tourists in Medellin the last couple of years. Prices (although still low according to our standards) have skyrocketed for them... and everybody seems to blame the tourists.  

On my next trip to Colombia, I'll avoid the main tourist hotspots (Medellin & Cartagena) and focus on the coffee axis and perhaps explore a few towns like Villavicencio (while doing my best to follow my own safety tips).

And well, I still have to see the first natural wonder that can take away my appetite for sex

[Menaughty]

I am a little ashamed of my story because I was so naive somehow. Even though I have always been so cautious. 

I have only been to Colombia once so far.

When I was in Bogota literally right outside my hotel across the street was a convenience store where early in the morning I was going to get some water.

One man approached me asking for an address of a place and I told him I don’t know, I’m visiting. He replies, I am also visiting from Ecuador.
Then another man approached who was wearing a suit showed an ID card of police with No pic!! 
he said all tourists are supposed to declare their valuables, so what he did he first took cash from the Ecuadorian guy went somewhere behind and then came back and returned him his cash and then he asked for my valuables. Luckily, I left majority of my cash and all my cards in my hotel, but I did have my cell phone with me which he asked for. I handed it to him. He said he will be back and then he never came back and the supposedly Ecuadorian man also left. It then clicked me that they were actually working together.
 

I know this was very dumb of me and I feel so ashamed, but hopefully this story would help someone else. 

[vinapu]

50 minutes ago, Menaughty said:

I know this was very dumb of me and I feel so ashamed, but hopefully this story would help someone else. 

no need nor reason to be ashamed.

I know somebody in similar situation happening in Montego Bay , Jamaica, this time early in the evening on busy street. When he laughed both guys claiming to be police off, 

he was shown a knife and a gun which straightened him up in a second. Difference with your case  was,  he left his phone in hotel but had most of his money on him and then fun part comes -robbers took his money from the wallet but knowingly left him 20 $ so one can plausibly claim they were part time angels

[joizy]

On 5/26/2025 at 4:59 PM, neyger said:

I do think that sites like mileroticos are safer than the apps.  At the bottom of each profile, you can see the various verifications that have been done,  how old the profile is, whether there have been any complaints in the past, .. 

 

That was also the feeling I had.  It could have happened to me. 
I think I will make better use of the love motels in the future.

Yes, love motels seem safe. When I was in Medellin, I used one once. It was a bit of a strange experience, but they knew what we were there for. They told me to lock up my valuables and also they made sure to check the ID of the guy I was meeting. He was a professional escort I met on Grindr, (but also advertised on Mileroticos) and would not even leave his home until I was checked into the motel and sent him a photo. There were precautions all around.