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Lonnie

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Everything posted by Lonnie

  1. Thanks Oz. Maybe the gayest song ever written first by The Village People then The Pet Shop Boys. pet-shop-boys-go-west_131778.mp4
  2. I'm so sorry to read France is back in lock down and for three weeks. Why do you think the vaccine rollout is going so badly? The few instances of my dealing with medical issues in France has left me with great respect for the French system. Is it Macron? The EU? Bureaucracy? y?
  3. Yes: http://www.babylonbangkok.com/
  4. Hi Oz, Having read that you are a bit picky in your hotel choice would you rule in or rule out the hotels on yhis list? The Glamorous Gay Hotels of Bangkok Babylon Gay Hotel Babylon is the only exclusively gay hotel of Bangkok and is truly a gay mecca, a slice of paradise where you can spend time with other gay travelers and enjoy the views around the communal areas. Although it’s in the middle of a commercial district, you’ll feel like you’re miles away from the hustle and bustle with the luscious gardens and classy design (including some pleasingly muscled statues!). There are plenty of spaces to unwind in; not just the gardens, but restaurants and a sauna area as well. Who knows who you could meet in the Jacuzzi? There’s a friendly, communal atmosphere and you’ll be surprised by how many new friends you’ll end up making. If you do choose to retreat to your room, you’ll find a pleasingly designed space that could be budget barracks or a spacious suite; it all depends on your budget. Urbana Sathorn This is a contemporary and comfortable oasis of calm in central Bangkok. The suites are sheer indulgence with floor-to-ceiling windows where you can gaze out onto the sparkling city. The location is ideal for sightseeing; then once your day is done you can retreat to the hotel and enjoy food at the on-site Amontre Restaurant. The team working here are friendly and accommodating, so you’ll feel 100% welcome for the whole of your visit. Hotel Muse Decorated with rich, dark wood furniture, low lighting and marble bathrooms, this luxurious hotel is one of the most glamorous unofficial gay hotels in Bangkok. It’s so sumptuously designed that you feel you need to dress up to match, which we don’t necessarily object to! There’s a 24-hour reception and all amenities are available – fitness center, dry cleaning, tour desk and a choice of restaurants. It’s a decadent sanctuary that will ensure you have a holiday to remember. The W Bangkok Expect sheer extravagance, gold accents and bathrooms as big as an apartment back home from the W in Bangkok. You know with a W hotel that you’re guaranteed an enjoyable and completely comfortable stay and this one does not disappoint. We love the contemporary design of the rooms and communal spaces. Facilities are modern and there are plenty of places to relax in after a hot day exploring the city. Stay here on a romantic couples’ holiday, or bring a date back to impress them! SO Sofitel Bangkok The stunning design of this 30-floor hotel is inspired by the five elements of the natural world: earth, wood, metal, fire and water. We love the clean lines and elegant touches in the rooms, all of which have baths and rain showers. Continuing the nature theme, the spa is designed as a magical forest and is a soothing space away from the traffic and bustle of Bangkok. No wonder this is such a popular choice with gay travelers – it’s tough to ever leave! The Sukhothai The perfect oasis of calm, the Sukhothai is a green paradise with a huge infinity pool and plenty of space to lounge around it. If you do drag yourself away to see the city, you’ll find a lot of the main attractions nearby. The design is inspired by traditional Thai interiors, with teak furniture and smooth wooden floors. There’s nothing traditional about the amenities, though – all of the technology in your suite is state of the art and designed for the comfort of the guests. Speaking of comfort, you’ll find even more at the indulgent spa area. Sala Rattanakosin With only 17 rooms, this is a more intimate option; many of our recommended gay hotels of Bangkok are big and impressive, but this one has a select and secluded feel that we love. While it might be further away from the city center, its riverside location is charming and you are close to the Grand Palace and Temple of the Emerald Buddha. The monochrome rooms are sleek and tasteful and every comfort has been thought of – you will lack for nothing. The rooftop bar continues the black and white theme and is the ideal place to start your evening. A cocktail and a view of the sunset over Bangkok equal sheer perfection! Shanghai Mansion This unique hotel is the height of glamor with interiors inspired by 1930s Shanghai. It was actually a Chinese Opera House and the Thailand Stock Exchange before being renovated as a hotel in 2005. While we all enjoy minimalist chic, sometimes it’s nice to stay somewhere colorful and lux and the Shanghai Mansion offers exactly that. There are four-poster beds and silk galore; the soaking tubs in the bathroom and the velvet sofas in the public spaces then add further to the exotic glamor. This hotel is perfect for people who love the finer things in life; you will also find jazz and delicious food at the Red Rose. Well Hotel Bangkok This hotel is all about wellness and relaxation, so it’s the perfect sanctuary from the chaos of the city streets. Gay hotels of Bangkok need to be places travelers feel fully comfortable, and the Well Hotel is definitely that. The neutral palette and clean lines of the rooms combine perfectly to sooth your mind and the swimming pool is spectacular. It’s a great place to float around before heading out for the night. One of our favorite things is the warm welcome and exceptional service. Mode Sathorn Hotel The rooftop swimming pool at this 4-star hotel is its main attraction; the infinity edge that seems to disappear into the Bangkok skyline and there are inbuilt lounge areas in the water. If that isn’t relaxing enough already, then head to the sauna instead! Everything that guests could possibly want is provided, from twenty-four-hour room service to a free grocery shopping service. There is also a choice of restaurants and bars on the premises should you want to stay in for the night. If you don’t, you’ll find all the best gay nightlife just a short walk away. Hilton Inn Express Sathorn If you would like high-quality accommodation with a lower price tag, consider staying at the Hilton Inn Express. It doesn’t feel like a chain, though, due to its fun artwork and modern design features. You’re right next to the Sky Train so Bangkok is yours to explore, and there’s a free breakfast to fuel up for the day ahead. It’s a good hotel for business, but there’s plenty of pleasure to be had too and the rooms are fully equipped, clean and up-to-date. You can walk to bars nearby and the international clientele means that gay travelers are very welcome here. Pullman Hotel G The all-white rooms at this 5-star hotel are so fresh and bright you practically need sunglasses! We love the clean feel of it, and the fun and modern design. It’s great to sit in your room and watch the sun go down over the city, before walking to the nearby gay bars. Enjoy the outdoor pool and the selection of restaurants on site – it offers guaranteed good food in a beautiful setting. Guests rave about the impeccable service and the best part is, it’s surprisingly affordable. Enjoy the holiday of a lifetime in one of these places – and you’ll keep heading back over and over again!
  5. Aon and Lan, who joke they are "an intergaycial couple," are the duo behind the award-winning LGBTQ+ travel blog Deer Is Travelling. Based in Bangkok the couple writes about living in Thailand and traveling in the region. The cofounders of LGBTQ Travel Thailand, Aon and Lan have collaborated with many hotel chains (including Hilton, Pullman, SO Sofitel, and Amari) and their blog has been recongnized by the Tourism Authority of Thailand. In our exclusive interview below they tell Out Traveler what makes Thailand such a great hub for travel, what most tourists to the area miss, and the best things about traveling as a couple. (Pictured: Phi Phi Islands, Thailand) How did you meet? We matched on Tinder and we were so busy, so we met for the first time a few months after that. But when we finally did, we had this click and our story started! We both didn’t plan to stay in Bangkok as Aon wanted to move to Canada to study and Lan was in Bangkok to learn Muay Thai for a year with the plans to travel more. But looks at us now! (Picture: Koh Kood Island Thailand) Why is your blog called Deer Is Travelling? For our first big trip together we went to Japan for two weeks. And I asked Aon: “We spent so much money on this trip, should we do at least a couplegram out of it?” And we actually did! When we started looking for a name, we thought "deer" may work because in Thai it has a queer meaning, plus during that time we used to call each other "dear deer." Plus one of us has a deer horn tattoo on the chest, so we thought we’re just like a deer — four legs and horns. And since the deer is an animal that is strong and independent, brave, and mostly does not hurt other animals; we thought it fits perfectly! (Pictured: Pullman Bangkok Hotel G in Bangkok, Thailand) What advice do you give LGBTQ+ travelers coming to the region? Thailand is famous for its beaches and temples. There are literally thousands of both here but normally only the beaches get well explored. We recommend everyone try to explore more mountains or cultural events. Thailand actually has over 40,000 temples but most tourists can name just a few. Let’s change that! (Pictured: Temple Wat Arun in Bangkok Thailand) Do you have a favorite destination in Thailand? Outside of Thailand? We love that it’s always hard to choose anything particular about Thailand. For example. last year we went to local regions Loei and Mae Hong Song, it was absolutely stunning! Then we came to visit two hidden gem islands — Koh Kood and Koh Phi Phi. Although each was absolutely different, those four destinations are the ones that surprised us the most. Outside of Thailand we definitely in love with Japan! We have been to the countryfour times but it’s never enough! We already planning to be back as soon as restriction ease. Also, we love the nature of Laos a lot! (Pictured: Koh Kood Island Thailand) What is the best thing about traveling as a couple? There are so many things! Especially for two guys who are almost the same size! We always share our clothes and personal care items, so we have a double wardrobe during our travels! It also means more food. It’s safer and cheaper. It is awesome to spend birthdays and other big holidays together, even better to share moments like splashing around the sea in the golden hour. We can even think of more reasons! Renting a kayak to paddle out to some hidden sea cave? Driving anywhere? Each of us gets a chance to sleep, take pictures, check the map, reserve the next hotel. It’s truly amazing! (Pictured: Koh Samed Island Thailand) What makes Thailand such a great hub for traveling? Thailand has it all! Culture, mountains, islands, crystal clear water, white sand beaches, kind people, food, and more! People in Thailand are very tolerant and we never had any problems with being a gay couple in Thailand. Maybe we just lucky but we couldn’t remember anything unfriendly that happened to us. (Pictured: Loha Prasat Wat Ratchanatdaram Worawihan Temple Bangkok) If you were setting up a culinary travel itinerary what restaurants or regions would be must-visits? Thailand is a large country with diverse geography, which over the years has led to the development of regional differences in cuisine. There are currently four different cooking styles in Thailand. Dishes in the north of Thailand are generally less spicy than in the rest of the country, with sticky rice traditionally mixed into small balls with the fingers. There is a strong influence from neighboring Burma and its popular dishes like Kaeng Hang Le, pork curry flavored with ginger, turmeric, and tamarind. Food in the northeast is influenced by Laos, usually very spicy food served with glutinous rice. Although there are many meat dishes, historically in the villages meat was very small, and the source of protein was shrimp and freshwater fish. They are often fermented to increase shelf life. The Central Region offers cuisine that is somewhere between north and south, with aromatic jasmine rice, a stickier variety, popular. The central area is home to royal cuisine, which makes it special. This type of cooking, which originated in the royal palace, involves more complex dishes prepared with more sophisticated methods. Southern Thai cuisine is the most popular outside of Thailand and is the main tourist region of the country. Coconut milk is much more commonly used in southern cuisine as a substitute for ghee for frying. The dishes are rich in seafood, as well as cashews from local plantations and coconut pulp as a condiment. Talking about Thai food is always hard since it made you hungry easy! (Pictured Red Lotus Floating Market in Thailand) Tell us about your biggest #TravelFail and how you recovered. Once we stayed in Da Nang, Vietnam. In the morning we were blue since we had not had enough time to explore all we wanted but it was time to leave the city and be back in Bangkok. We went to check out from the hotel but the receptionist said our hotel check-out wasn’t until the next day! We checked our flight and it wasn’t until the next day as well! Somehow we miscounted and got an extra day in Vietnam, which made us so happy! (Pictured: Pullman Bangkok Hotel Luang Prabang, Laos) What are your top LGBTQ+ travel resources? We started our blog for the reason that there are almost no LGBTQ+ friendly resources about Thailand. Plus, we always were looking for hidden gems places around Thailand but there is not much information either. At first, we were confused ourselves and later decided to make Deer is Traveling to show how it is to be a gay couple in Thailand but also show the beauty of Thailand that regular tourists often don't see. (Pictured: Koh Kood Island Thailand)
  6. Yes! What a good idea...maybe begin with this cabana boy:
  7. It was bound to happen. Guys are now regularly sharing their COVID vaccination status in their app profiles. https://www.advocate.com/commentary/2021/3/29/vax-4-vax-taking-over-grindr
  8. You have to copy and paste in your browser...clicking won't work for some reason. https://adult.noodlemagazine.com/watch/345520544_456239073
  9. Tom, Were they after particular people?...their tactics looked very unprofessional.
  10. Some Brazilian gogo/strippers at this site: https://adult.noodlemagazine.com/watch/345520544_456239073
  11. You certainly have a way of making this reader horny and jealous at the same time.
  12. Oh boy if you can't figure it out then everyone's lost....I asked a friend whose supposedly a twitter whizbang and he gave this advice. I hope it helps. I thought this was going to take a while but then I went searching again and found this article describing how to turn on notifications so I jumped on it! Right inside Twitter settings, buried deep in Settings and privacy > Notifications > Push notifications is a setting I must have enabled called “Tweets from people you follow”. Disable this and your notifications are your own again. Do this on a mobile device as on the web you have to enable Push Notifications and your browser may not support them.
  13. https://garotocomlocal.com.br/acompanhante-masculino/massimo-ferrari/
  14. So sad to have had such a painful death...hopefully he's at peace now and a real reminder to get our affairs in order.
  15. Thanks for the tip on the article in Vanity Fair...a great read! https://www.vanityfair.com/style/2020/07/did-doris-duke-get-away-with-murder
  16. Here's a link to a preview Mr. EAK using his massive tool...yikes he's big. https://www.rawthaiguyz.com/uncategorized/mr-pond-and-mr-eak-a-dream-come-true/
  17. Murders of Gay, Bi Men Show How Police, Media Fail the Queer Community Doris Duke (Peter Lance); Wayne Lonergan (Getty); Eduardo Tirella (Peter Lance) Three books delve into murder cases — and reveal how anti-LGBTQ+ bias hamper police, the judicial system, and media investigations. It was supposed to be one last goodbye for Eduardo Tirella, a onetime performer and popular milliner who hung with Frank Sinatra before becoming a talented decorator, art curator, and in middle age, a promising movie set designer. Tirella, a gay war hero and Italian-American (back when that was still considered “ethnic” in America) was on the cusp of Hollywood success at 42. A good friend of Sharon Tate, Richard Burton, and other actors, Tirella had just spent a decade curating art projects for the many estates of Doris Duke — then the richest woman in America. But, having designed the sets of Elizabeth Taylor’s The Sandpiper and Tate’s Don’t Make Waves, Tirella was moving on from Duke's employ. He’d arranged to join his partner, artist Edmund Kara, who sometimes worked alongside him, in California. Instead, on that fateful 1966 eve in Newport, R.I., Tirella’s goodbye became permanent. He ended up crushed under a Dodge Polara station wagon, having been pushed through giant iron gates, dragged 20 feet, and plowed into a tree. To say he was pulverized would not be an exaggeration. No one leaves Doris Duke, it was said. Not even her designer. In Peter Lance’s meticulous book Homicide at Rough Point — which delves into Tirella’s 1966 death, the scant police investigation, subsequent lawsuits, and rumors of a cover-up — the former ABC News correspondent argues that Tirella knew telling Duke he was leaving could put him in danger. She had, after all, stabbed an ex with a butcher knife during an argument. But Tirella clearly hadn’t expected her to slide into the driver’s seat, run him down, and keep going until she rammed his body between two tons of steel and the trunk of a tree. The scene of the crime outside Doris Duke's estate the morning after she killed Eduardo Tirella (courtesy Peter Lance) Newport authorities may have believed her story — that it was just a terrible accident — but Lance’s reporting demonstrates that it’s just as likely they decided that covering up the unfortunate “incident” was simply in their best interests. “The town fathers, in general, adopted an almost obsequious solicitation of Doris after she began giving tens of thousands of dollars to the Cliff Walk Restoration Project and Newport Hospital, where she was hidden from state investigators on the evening of the incident,” Lance says. (Read our full interview here.) “Further, the Newport Restoration Foundation, which restored 70 colonial-era homes and helped turn Newport into a tourist mecca, was an extension of the murderous quid pro quo that helped Doris Duke escape intent-to-kill murder charges.” Nearly 50 years later, the death of Kirushnakumar Kanagaratnam was met with much of the same official disinterest as Tirella’s. Kanagaratnam arrived in Canada in 2010, aboard the MV Sun Sea, along with 491 other Tamil refugees whose efforts to escape the civil war in Sri Lanka led to a perilous ocean journey in which many others were sickened or died. After being at sea for months, then stuck offshore for weeks, the refugees were finally allowed into Canada to present asylum claims. Like most of them, Kanagaratnam’s refugee claim was denied, but he stayed in Canada anyway, living in the margins, making money on odd jobs until two years after he was denied asylum, he was found dead, dismembered, buried in planter boxes in a stranger’s tidy suburban yard. Kanagaratnam wasn’t the only one either — seven other men, mostly gay or bisexual men of color, had been killed by the same Toronto man, gay landscaper Bruce McArthur. Like Tirella, Kanagaratnam was also a victim of the media, the police, and a society that ignored his worth in favor of a more convenient narrative. In his recent book Missing From the Village: The Story of Serial Killer Bruce McArthur, the Search for Justice, and the System That Failed Toronto’s Queer Community, author Justin Ling reveals how the intersections of racism, homophobia, transphobia, and police procedures fail queer and trans people. There is a fundamental mismatch between how heavily overpoliced queer and trans people are, Ling says, and yet how fundamentally under-protected and underserved we are, and not just in Toronto, where McArthur operated for decades. “One thing that I really wanted to hit home with this book was not just that this could happen anywhere, but that it already has — and, in many places, it’s continuing to happen,” Ling says. “All you have to do is pick a major North American city and start scrolling through cold cases to find faces of queer people whose killings have remained unsolved for decades. Serial killers targeting gay men were common from the 1970s to the 1990s throughout North America. Today, trans women, and particularly trans women of color, are disproportionately targeted. Even in our grotesquely serial killer-obsessed culture, we spend painfully little time talking about this.” What strikes Ling as so frustrating about the Toronto murders (McArthur is serving life for killing eight men) is that we were supposed to have done better. “We were supposed to have learned all these lessons — about vulnerable populations, about police-community relations, about ensuring that we never lost track of missing people — and yet throughout this whole painful story, it seems those lessons were consistently forgotten,” he says. (Read our full interview with Ling.) “Men disappeared from the center of the Gay Village, one after another, and we just let it happen.” The gay journalist behind the CBC podcast Uncover, which examined cold cases from the 1970s that were reopened as a result of the McArthur investigation, Ling spent five years of in-depth reporting to tell the full story of police failure, to detail how the queer community responded, and to share the lives of the eight men who went missing and the lives they left behind. In telling that story, Ling uncovers the latent homophobia and racism that kept this case unsolved and unseen. It’s a serious look at how police agencies fail to treat missing person cases seriously, and how policies and laws pushed McArthur’s victims out of the light and into the shadows. Police failures tie Ling’s book to Lance’s, but another thread running through them — and Allan Levine’s Details Are Unprintable: Wayne Lonergan and the Sensational Café Society Murder — is the role the media has played in how it covers (or doesn’t) these real-life queer crime stories. The media never investigated the potential connection between Duke’s philanthropy and the decision not to prosecute her for Tirella’s death, and instead, it covered the story the way Duke wanted it to. “I don’t believe the media was complicit at the time,” Lance says now. “But, perhaps worse, they were casual about the death of this man and clearly saw him as some kind of inferior to Doris Duke.” Wayne Lonergan (Getty) and a lurid newspaper headline during his trial (newspapers.com) Levine, who spent 18 months researching court and police records for Details Are Unprintable, found that media coverage also played a role in the early-1940s murder conviction of Wayne Lonergan, a closeted gay or bi man, for killing his wealthy wife. Although Levine believes Lonergan was the perpetrator, the author maintains that the press coverage of Lonergan’s rumored sexuality tilted the jury. “Given the lack of any physical evidence, which today might cause a jury to have doubts, the intense publicity about Lonergan’s sexuality no doubt contributed to a preconceived and negative bias about him in the minds of a typical 1940s male heterosexual jury, whose members subscribed to the antigay attitudes of the era,” Levine says. (Read our full interview with Levine.) In the case of Toronto’s missing men, Ling says, “The serious media attention came far too late. In 2013, police announced that they believed three missing person cases were likely connected — underscoring the strong possibility of a serial killer. About six months later, headquarters shut down the investigation. Not one major news outlet followed up to ask why.”
  18. Ellen DeGeneres Loses 1 Million Viewers After Apologies for Toxic Workplace “The Ellen DeGeneres Show,” a sturdy daytime hit, has had a steep ratings decline since the host addressed accusations by former staff members that led to firings and an internal investigation. Amid speculation about the future of “The Ellen DeGeneres Show,” Warner Bros. said it would return next season.Credit...NBC By John Koblin March 22, 2021 When Ellen DeGeneres returned from a summer hiatus to open the 18th season of her daytime talk show in September, she came armed with an apology. “I learned that things happen here that never should have happened,” she said. “I take that very seriously. And I want to say I am so sorry to the people who were affected.” Those remarks came in the wake of reports of workplace misconduct at “The Ellen DeGeneres Show.” Viewers tuned in for the apology: This year’s season opener had the highest ratings for an “Ellen” premiere in four years. And then they tuned out. “Ellen” has lost more than a million viewers since September, according to the research firm Nielsen, averaging 1.5 million viewers over the last six months, down from 2.6 million in the same period last year. The decline has come at a time when workplace behavior, in Hollywood and elsewhere, has come under intense scrutiny against a backdrop of protest and social change. It is a startling setback for one of daytime television’s most successful franchises and for Ms. DeGeneres, who was at the forefront of an earlier cultural shift when, as the star of a prime-time network sitcom in the 1990s, she announced that she is gay. The show’s loss of more than a million viewers translates to a 43 percent decline, representing a steeper drop than any of its competitors. This TV season, “Ellen,” the winner of dozens of Emmys since its start in 2003, is no longer in the same league as traditional rivals like “Dr. Phil” (2.5 million) and “Live: With Kelly and Ryan” (2.7 million). Now it finds itself uncomfortably close to shows hosted by Maury Povich (1.4 million), Kelly Clarkson (1.3 million), Rachael Ray (1.2 million), Tamron Hall (1.1 million) and Jerry Springer’s former security guard Steve Wilkos (1.1 million). The loss of viewers includes a 38 percent decline in her core audience, adult women under 54, according to Nielsen. And it appears to have put a dent in the show’s ad revenue. From September to January of the 2019-20 season, “Ellen” brought in $131 million from advertisers, according to the research firm Kantar. That has fallen to $105 million for the same period in 2020-21, a drop of about 20 percent. Ms. DeGeneres, 63, has publicly mused on the possibility of leaving the show in recent years, and the spotlight on her workplace troubles has added to the questions about her future. Her talk-show contract runs through next year. Warner Bros., the division of AT&T’s WarnerMedia that produces “Ellen,” confirmed that the show would return for a 19th season in September, after her usual summer hiatus. A spokeswoman for Ms. DeGeneres declined to comment when asked if the 2021-22 television season would be her last. “‘The Ellen DeGeneres Show’ remains one of the top three highest-rated syndicated talk shows this season,” David McGuire, an executive vice president of programming at Telepictures, a Warner Bros. subsidiary, said in a statement. He suggested other reasons for the decline, like changing viewing habits during the pandemic. “While broadcast is down across the board and Covid has been challenging for production, we are looking forward to bringing back our live audiences and a 19th season filled with all of the hilarious and heartwarming moments that have made ‘Ellen’ one of the longest running and most successful talk shows in history,” he added. Whether or not the next season of “Ellen” is its last, WarnerMedia and Ms. DeGeneres are together for the long haul. In 2019, the company made a deal with her to produce four programs for its HBO Max streaming platform, including a home-design challenge series; a dating show; an animated show, “Little Ellen”; and a documentary series on inventors made in conjunction with the Albert Einstein estate. (In another deal, she recently signed a multiyear pact with Discovery to produce natural history documentary. Continue reading the main story Public perception of Ms. DeGeneres started to change in July when BuzzFeed reported that several of the show’s former and current staff members said they had confronted “racism, fear and intimidation” on the set. Several staff members also said producers had sexually harassed them. Warner Bros. investigated the workplace and found “deficiencies.” Three high-level producers were fired, including Ed Glavin, an executive producer; Jonathan Norman, a co-executive producer; and Kevin Leman, the head writer. Ms. DeGeneres apologized to her staff before addressing her viewers in September. Some observers believe the accusations may have weakened Ms. DeGeneres’s relationship with her audience. The host built her show as an oasis from the outside world, a place of goofy dancing, light jokes, cash giveaways to surprised audience members and high-wattage celebrity guests. Several years ago, she adopted “be kind” as her motto, in response to the suicide of Tyler Clementi, a gay college student who took his own life after being bullied. “Her brand is not just being fairly nice — it is ‘Be Kind,’” said Stephen Galloway, the dean of Chapman University’s Dodge College of film and media arts. “She’s chosen two words to stamp herself. You cannot have hypocrisy better defined than when you’ve chosen those two words to define yourself and everyone is seeing the opposite is true inside your show. “The reason the incident with the producers was such a difficult and perilous moment is it’s the first time where something surfaced to indicate that a family — Ellen’s own professional family — was dysfunctional,” he continued. Ms. DeGeneres referred to her motto in her on-air apology. “Being known as the Be Kind Lady is a tricky position to be in,” she said. “So let me give you some advice. If anyone is thinking of changing their title or giving yourself a nickname, do not go with the Be Kind Lady.” She added that she was indeed the cheerful person she appeared to be on television, but was also someone who experienced moments of sadness, anxiety and impatience. In addition to her daytime show, Ms. DeGeneres is also a prime-time star for NBC — and her show for that network, “Ellen’s Game of Games,” also a Warner production, has lost 32 percent of its viewers this season, as well as 35 percent in the adult demographic important to advertisers. Even with the complications affecting all talk shows during the pandemic, “Ellen,” with its loss of 43 percent of its audience, has suffered a steeper decline than its rivals. “Dr. Phil” is down 22 percent, and “The Kelly Clarkson” show has lost 26 percent of its viewers. Kelly Ripa and Ryan Seacrest’s show has lost just 3 percent, and “Tamron Hall” is down 9 percent. Ms. DeGeneres beat the odds to make her show a success. There is a television graveyard filled with the comics, actors, anchors and reality stars who have taken a crack at syndicated talk shows only to be yanked off the air because of low ratings. And when “Ellen” premiered, she also had to overcome the hesitancy of affiliate managers who thought an openly gay person could not connect with the women who make up most of the daytime audience. Her quick wit and approachable manner earned her millions of fans and ultimately a plum late-afternoon slot in most markets. As recently as a few years ago, the show was drawing roughly three million viewers an episode. As Ms. DeGeneres fights through a loss in popularity, she has turned to celebrity friends to help her make the case that there is not much difference between the on-camera Ellen and the real Ellen. When Michelle Obama was a virtual guest last week, she spoke warmly about the time she went to Ms. DeGeneres’s house and they played a piano duet together. A video clip of the pair at the piano was shown. Another recent guest, Jennifer Garner, also appearing remotely, raced to her hotel room balcony at the host’s request to tell passers-by how much she adored Ms. DeGeneres. “I love her!” Ms. Garner shouted. “She’s kind! She’s a humanitarian! She loves animals!” Correction: March 22, 2021 An earlier version of this article misstated the average number of viewers for "Dr. Phil," according to Nielsen. It is 2.5 million, not 3.1 million.
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