GPs who ask for (Financial) Help

[Canadianbtmguy]

This has come up a few times over the years but this is the first time that I am likely to help one.

I wrote about this guy about a week ago. I met him at 117, he had come for the weekend with his friend from a small city in Sao Paolo state, about 5 hours from Sao Paolo. I visited him there and had a great time. His friend there convinced him of all the money they could make in Europe, and so (probably using the money I gave him plus more, because that alone would not be enough) bought a ticket to Europe. It seems to have been a bust (besides the language barrier, Rome and Paris may not have been the best choices).

He wants to go home and asked me for help. I said i could look into using miles to get him home (if he just wanted money, a useless offer); I told him it would be an ugly flight with 2 stops about 10 hours each, not leaving until wednesday, he said no problem. I ask him if he had a place to stay, he sent his location (he's at Orly airport) and says he's grateful enough that I'm getting his flight, no need to pay for a hotel, there are a lot of police there and it is safe. Basically I'm trying to separate the actually desperate from the greedy. And he's passing everything that I throw at him. Any other strategies?

A question of not so general application is that he could more than make up the coat to me (25k miles + $100) by buying something in Paris (an over-the-counter medication) that I want that is much cheaper there. (about $100 there versus several times that here and I would like about 5-10 of it). If I send him cash by Western Union or whatever, he could be tempted to spend it (the cash price of a flight is about $500 so as long as I was content with 2 or 3 it would be foolish for him to not buy it and then lose my flight. I thought of some kind of like reloadable credit card (like every time he buys one he takes a picture of it with the receipt and I reload another $100).  Any ideas on how to accomplish this effectively? I will be in brazil from Jan 2 so getting what he buys is not a problem.

But again the second question is subsidiary to the first; anything else I should be doing/asking to be sure that he really is in a desperate situation and not just wanting a gratuitous um...gratuity...

 

[scott456]

You can fly to Paris and buy the medication yourself.  Is Brazil your only travel destination, you don't travel to Europe?

If you want to give him a mileage ticket, consider it a charitable donation with no string attached.  But you sound like you want to attach something to whatever between you and this GP. 

[floridarob]

8 hours ago, Canadianbtmguy said:

(an over-the-counter medication) that I want that is much cheaper there. (about $100 there versus several times that here and I would like about 5-10 of it)

Living in Mexico, there are always people looking for someone to "mule" medications down. Both OTC and prescription in quantities, if inspected can cause problems. 

If it was 1 or 2 , you could explain it as personal use, but more than that I think is asking a lot of someone, mileage/revenue ticket or not.

 

[bcdaron]

I know generally speaking that when I visit a country I have to show proof of a return ticket. It may be different there but I would check the immigration requirements for said GP and see if that is also a requirement to enter Europe from Brazil. If that is the case, I would be very leery of entrusting him with any cash. 

[Canadianbtmguy]

I figured out on certain credit cards you can put a monthly limit. I gave him the card number and he put it on his phone. I did it with chase, I put it at $120 and I can raise it after he gets the first one, (and cancel the card when he is done.) I decided to try to have him get 3. We'll see how it goes

To answer a couple of questions I do go to Europe often, but typically not until spring. And I think all non-immigrants are supposed to have a return ticket, but I recall only one instance of even being asked, and it certainly wasn't in Rome, where he entered

[floridarob]

4 hours ago, bcdaron said:

I know generally speaking that when I visit a country I have to show proof of a return ticket. It may be different there but I would check the immigration requirements for said GP and see if that is also a requirement to enter Europe from Brazil. If that is the case, I would be very leery of entrusting him with any cash. 

He's in Europe going back to Brasil, is my understanding 🤔

[Mavica]

I would not ask someone to mule medication for me, not at the quantity suggested in the OP.  Doing so places the young man at risk.  If I'd been with the person, enjoyed the time and he was returning gain to where I spent time with him I might be inclined to send the ticket / money.  Maybe there's the possibility of another hook-up, out of gratitude. If I were taken advantage of by being kind, so be it.  I've been burned giving money to escorts in the USA in response to appeals for help, but never the multiple times I did so when I lived in Mexico.  It's a gut feeling type of decision.

[numazu]

Intriguing predicament @Canadianbtmguy.  Did you end up helping the guy? I’ve been asked to help with airfare throughout the years by GPs and never really did help anyone if I wasn’t in the same trip.  Seems like he is desperate.

And is he staying in an airport while he waits for help? Winter in Europe can’t be a comfortable climate for a Brasileiro.

[scott456]

Winter in Europe is bitterly cold OUTDOOR.  But most indoor space is very nice and warm, better than Sao Paulo indoor in June through August when none of the bars, clubs, saunas or airports have heating.

[scott456]

8 hours ago, floridarob said:

He's in Europe going back to Brasil, is my understanding 🤔

The said GP might have a rountrip ticket when he entered EU, but ditched the return ticket and overstayed.  That's how these type of people do it.

[Canadianbtmguy]

So, a bit of an update. He told me he was taking the tram from Orly into the city, as it creeps through gritty southern suburbs of Paris and oversaw someone reading Portugese on their phone and he forced himself to start a conversation with him (for a tall and handsome guy he's kind of quiet; and I've heard before that Brazilians who encounter other Brazilians don't tend to be overly friendly to each other...) But I guess the guy kind of got him a gig* in the restaurant he works washing dishes or whatever until new years and is staying in a hostel (yeah I guess he slept in orly airport 2 or 3 nights); as he says, it is not exactly his dream but neither was it his dream to return home after 2 weeks in utter defeat. So he asked me to "postpone" (please don't cancel) the ticket until after new years. Sounds reasonable, who knows if it's true... The point of general application, though, is that I think I want to believe him, as I want to believe people generally (and concededly, cute charming guys, especially) How does/should one fight this impetus? And should one try to dull it generally in oneself or trust oneself to engage in a case-by-case examination?

For factual clarification, he went there with a somewhat older, somewhat more savvy (not nearly as handsome) GP friend of his who maybe knew that you could book a return flight in case asked and then cancel within 24 hours. Just a guess. He himself doesn't have a credit card so not sure. The medication is over the counter in all 3 relevant countries, (just far cheaper in France) so I don't know if the mule analogies are quite right.

Anyway, I will update more as it arises

*writing "gig" in another sense of the word than Rio-lovers are accustomed made me remember a few months ago, I was flying ITA to Rio and one middle-aged, overly makeup-ed checkin agent was asking her similar colleague to print my boarding pass(or something) and the second asked the first what was the destination, and she said "GIG....come[as in]....gig-olo" as they cackled at their inside joke that was, in fact, neither😆

[floridarob]

8 hours ago, Canadianbtmguy said:

The medication is over the counter in all 3 relevant countries, (just far cheaper in France) so I don't know if the mule analogies are quite right.

Put the shoe of the other foot, how many times have you been questioned by customs officials in other countries? Would you take 10 OTC things for someone?

I brought Inca Cola from Peru back to Mexico....they sent a bottle to the lab to be tested, while I was detained. I've had pills, from my pill a day dispenser confiscated (blood pressure pills) because they were unidentifiable......,and more.

I don't mule anything for anyone, no matter how "legal" they think/claim it to be. Nor do I ask anyone to mule anything...the potential problems even if nothing comes of it in the end aren't worth it.