LOS Trip Report

[mauRICE]

2 hours ago, jimmie50 said:

As a follow-up to my most recent update, Bee shared when asking for support that he also works part time after bank hours at two different massage shops...one in Sathorn and the other Surawong.  I believe they were owned by the same person and they just send him to the shop where he is needed the most.  No judgement about that...realize he is doing what he needs to do in order to support himself and his parents.  Just filled with mixed emotions.  

Out of curiosity, what bank does he work at? Did he show you his bank ID? How do you know he's supporting his parents? Because he told you? How do you even know he has parents? What massage shop does he work at? Have you been there? How did he manage his rent before you arrived? How is he going to manage his rent next month? And the month after that? Did you even know his full name and where he lived before you sent him the money? 

Consider the 10,000 baht you gave him as tip for the few days he was with you and move on. He has.

Enjoy Chiang Mai. I hear it's been raining every day for the past few days.

 

[Keithambrose]

4 hours ago, mauRICE said:

Out of curiosity, what bank does he work at? Did he show you his bank ID? How do you know he's supporting his parents? Because he told you? How do you even know he has parents? What massage shop does he work at? Have you been there? How did he manage his rent before you arrived? How is he going to manage his rent next month? And the month after that? Did you even know his full name and where he lived before you sent him the money? 

Consider the 10,000 baht you gave him as tip for the few days he was with you and move on. He has.

Enjoy Chiang Mai. I hear it's been raining every day for the past few days.

 

What a helpful post!

[emiel1981]

14 hours ago, jimmie50 said:

I know, I know…everyone else probably saw this coming. 

First of all, thank you for your honest post and sharing your story. It's always interesting and nice to hear the follow-up to a story, even though it's obviously not as rosy as we all hoped for you. But as you yourself said: if we were realistic, we would all have assumed that sooner or later the request for financial support would come... And I can completely understand that because that request for help initially seemed to materialize, you might have had some hope that things would be different with him than in most cases...

It's good that you realize you shouldn't keep transferring money. Because then you'll likely continue to receive a never-ending stream of requests for money. Keep your wits about you and don't let your emotions get the better of you and tempt you to make another payment.

15 hours ago, jimmie50 said:

Meeting Woody this morning from Siam Roads, so hopefully he will be able to brighten my spirits a bit

Woody is a really nice guy, so I'm sure you'll enjoy the rest of your journey. I look forward to your future updates.

[zoomomancs]

1 hour ago, emiel1981 said:

First of all, thank you for your honest post and sharing your story. It's always interesting and nice to hear the follow-up to a story, even though it's obviously not as rosy as we all hoped for you. But as you yourself said: if we were realistic, we would all have assumed that sooner or later the request for financial support would come... And I can completely understand that because that request for help initially seemed to materialize, you might have had some hope that things would be different with him than in most cases...

It's good that you realize you shouldn't keep transferring money. Because then you'll likely continue to receive a never-ending stream of requests for money. Keep your wits about you and don't let your emotions get the better of you and tempt you to make another payment.

Woody is a really nice guy, so I'm sure you'll enjoy the rest of your journey. I look forward to your future updates.

I think 75% of the men I've been with in the last 15 years have messaged afterwards to ask for money. In my early years I did send money but nowadays I tell them 'I don't send money and I don't lend money'. When I'm there, and in a better position to assess their story, I can be persuaded to give them 2000bt if times are hard. 

[jason1975]

I know of a bar guy who has been given 50k a month from a rich sponsor for past few months.

[iendo]

3 hours ago, emiel1981 said:

First of all, thank you for your honest post and sharing your story. It's always interesting and nice to hear the follow-up to a story, even though it's obviously not as rosy as we all hoped for you. But as you yourself said: if we were realistic, we would all have assumed that sooner or later the request for financial support would come... And I can completely understand that because that request for help initially seemed to materialize, you might have had some hope that things would be different with him than in most cases...

It's good that you realize you shouldn't keep transferring money. Because then you'll likely continue to receive a never-ending stream of requests for money. Keep your wits about you and don't let your emotions get the better of you and tempt you to make another payment.

Good and constructive post. If someone is being open in telling his story, he can probably do without "I told you so" and ridicule. I think that many of us learned the hard way, even after being warned. It's like a ride off passage...or a coming of age if you will.

Mine was relatively cheap. I gave the boy 10k baht so he could go home after our visit together to Bangkok. After I gave him the money he went straight on a bus back to Pattaya. I guess that was his new home

Live and learn for us all. 

[jimmie50]

23 hours ago, mauRICE said:

Out of curiosity, what bank does he work at? Did he show you his bank ID? How do you know he's supporting his parents? Because he told you? How do you even know he has parents? What massage shop does he work at? Have you been there? How did he manage his rent before you arrived? How is he going to manage his rent next month? And the month after that? Did you even know his full name and where he lived before you sent him the money? 

He works at Kasikorn Bank.  He goes between the Sathorn branch and the Silom branch.  I have met him at the Sathorn branch for a quick cup of coffee when he has taking a break, so I have seen him actually working at the bank and in uniform with badge.  That part I don't doubt.  I know where the massage shop in Sathorn is located, very near his bank, but do not know the name nor did I realize he was working there.  They are all older women except him.  I thought he was just having casual conversation with them and did not realize they knew each other from a working relationship.  No idea the name or location of the Surawong shop.  He showed me photos of his parents, as well as his sister who was killed in the tsunami and some other family members that were killed.  I believe he said he lost a total of 9 or 12 family members in that horrific event.  I know his actual Thai name (Bee is nickname), have seen his official government ID, know the address of his studio apartment but never actually been there, and don't know how much he pays in rent monthly.  I didn't want to ask at the time.  I suppose the family photos could belong to someone else, but I would have no way of knowing that.  Given that so much info was actually factual...I guess I just wanted to believe it was all true.  Don't know what part or how much is fiction.  

[jimmie50]

12 hours ago, emiel1981 said:

It's good that you realize you shouldn't keep transferring money. Because then you'll likely continue to receive a never-ending stream of requests for money. Keep your wits about you and don't let your emotions get the better of you and tempt you to make another payment.

Yes, the tap has been cut off, so to speak.  I have heard from him again explaining that he has a 150,000 Baht loan he needs to pay off which is why he needs the help.  I haven't blocked him, but also haven't responded.  Disappointed for sure, but also have no desire to be in any type of relationship where the entire purpose is for me to be a walking ATM.  As I said, realistically it was too good to be true.  

[jimmie50]

23 hours ago, mauRICE said:

Consider the 10,000 baht you gave him as tip for the few days he was with you and move on. He has.

Enjoy Chiang Mai. I hear it's been raining every day for the past few days.

Yes, lesson learned and nice tip for him.  It has been raining quite a lot...more than was expected.  Got soaked at the Sunday night market and again yesterday at some large temple complex outside of the city.  Today is overcast, but no rain so far.  Chiang Mai is literally overrun with tourists.  Bus after bus after bus.  Traffic is horrible.  Lantern Festival November 4-6 was heavily promoted by Chiang Mai government.  Honestly think more tourists are here than I saw in Bangkok.  Definitely at or over maximum capacity for venues to even function properly.  

[jimmie50]

On 11/4/2025 at 10:06 AM, vinapu said:

I believe you opened pandora box by voluntarily doubling his stated need and giving him 10 K instead of 5 K.

While my intent was to do something nice, you are correct.  I opened the door.  Might as well have opened my wallet and said 'help yourself'.  Guess the advantage of always having my Thai friends taking care of me when visiting in the past, I was protected or sheltered from such experiences.  Lesson learned the hard way.  Guess the old saying you are never too old to learn something new is true in my case.  

[jimmie50]

Thanks to everyone for the moral support, suggestions and good advice.  Really appreciate it!!!

[Enchanted_Elixir]

32 minutes ago, jimmie50 said:

Yes, the tap has been cut off, so to speak.  I have heard from him again explaining that he has a 150,000 Baht loan he needs to pay off which is why he needs the help.  I haven't blocked him, but also haven't responded.  Disappointed for sure, but also have no desire to be in any type of relationship where the entire purpose is for me to be a walking ATM.  As I said, realistically it was too good to be true.  

The Thai middle class got a notorious debt problem. So his story is very familiar. 

[captainmick]

4 hours ago, jimmie50 said:

Yes, lesson learned and nice tip for him.  It has been raining quite a lot...more than was expected.  Got soaked at the Sunday night market and again yesterday at some large temple complex outside of the city.  Today is overcast, but no rain so far.  Chiang Mai is literally overrun with tourists.  Bus after bus after bus.  Traffic is horrible.  Lantern Festival November 4-6 was heavily promoted by Chiang Mai government.  Honestly think more tourists are here than I saw in Bangkok.  Definitely at or over maximum capacity for venues to even function properly.  

Chiang Mai is always VERY crowded for Yi Peng festival.  It is the busiest few days of the year there with hoards of Thai people as well as international tourists flocking to the city for those few days.

[mauRICE]

54 minutes ago, captainmick said:

Chiang Mai is always VERY crowded for Yi Peng festival.  It is the busiest few days of the year there with hoards of Thai people as well as international tourists flocking to the city for those few days.

I think most Chiang Mai locals would say Songkran is the busiest time of the year with the days lasting longer. That said, there was a huge influx of visitors during Loy Kratong last year and most of my Chiang Mai friends chose to stay home during the festivities. I'm happy for the business owners; a friend who runs a coffeeshop says business has been brisk these past few weeks. The snowbirds from Japan, Europe, etc are back early.

[mauRICE]

5 hours ago, jimmie50 said:

While my intent was to do something nice, you are correct.  I opened the door.  

They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions...as is the road to Silom/Patpong/Pattaya/Jomtien Complex etc. If it's any consolation, in my long association with the Land of Smiles, I've not seen a single case of someone being refused "help" in this way ending up in the streets. They just move on to another host.

Good luck and I hope you enjoy the rest of of your holiday!

PS Check out the fruit carts you see on the streets. Some of them may have lamood.

 

[iendo]

9 hours ago, Enchanted_Elixir said:

The Thai middle class got a notorious debt problem. So his story is very familiar. 

That reminded me of a video on YouTube i saw a while ago.

 

[jimmie50]

No contact from Bee yesterday.  Either he has figured out this ship isn't going to sail, or perhaps thinks the lack of any contact will produce a change of heart on my part.  In either case, the silence was actually a relief to me.  Enjoyed my day with Woody on Tuesday, and he hooked me up at his shop for a massage.  That certainly helped lift my spirits.  lol.  Ventured out on my own yesterday afternoon to AquaCNX.  Will include a full review when I get home and wrap up the trip report, but for now just wanted to update everyone on my current 'situation'.   Head for Chiang Mai airport around noon to begin that long trek back to Denver.  Not looking forward to that.   

[vinapu]

have a safe flight !

[jason1975]

Thank you for writing about your experiences in such detail and with much honesty. I wouldn't be quick to close the door with Bee. He seems to be genuinely in need of financial assistance. If I remember correctly, when he first met you, he didn't talk about money at all and he seemed like he wanted to know whether there could be chemistry between the two of you for a relationship.

It takes time to get to know a person. I encourage you to keep in touch with him when you are back at home. If you are able to maintain meaningful online conversations with him, that shows there is some connection in your relationship. If you want to, you might consider sending him a small sum of money every month to help him slowly clear his debt. However, you should be the one deciding how much to give and it is based on how much you are prepared to give and not how much he asks for.

I have known my regular guy for 9 years now and it started back in 2016. I subsequently met him every time I visited Bangkok.

In 2019, he was disillusioned with the life working in a bar so he asked me if I could support him monthly if he went back to Vietnam. It was a reasonable sum and I could afford it so I said yes. It was not his only source of income. He worked and my money merely supplemented his earnings as he provided for his parents. But Covid hit and things were bad. The job situation in Vietnam didn't recover after Covid so he came back to Bangkok to work in 2022.

I got reunited with him physically and have been meeting him for the past few years. He's done well enough that I have stopped sending him money every month. Of course, I tend to give him quite a bit more than a regular customer when I meet him in Bangkok!

Our long distance relationship consists of chatting about mundane things such as "what did you eat for dinner?" or "how's the weather?" but we also ask about each other's health and share about our individual life.

[vinapu]

while Jason's story is uplifting , I still think if guy asks for support just after 3 or 4 days from 1st meeting coupled with fact that he has a job in bank and still managed to go deep in debt is bad omen and keeping in touch , never mind supporting him,  invites never ending  money requests. 

[jimmie50]

Day 16 - Chiang Rai

To be honest, early morning departures are getting to be exhausting.  Luggage needs to be ready and outside our hotel room one hour before scheduled departure, plus we need to have breakfast before getting on the bus. 6am breakfast and luggage call with 7am departure for Chiang Rai.  Today will be a very long bus ride…approximately 7.5 hours.  We made a couple of stops along the way at various local temples so we could stretch and use the restroom as needed.  During these stops is where I learned that Buddhist temples do not all look the same.  Style of the temple and also the Buddha is very much a regional thing.  Temples in Northern Thailand look different from those we may have visited in Bangkok.  The face of Buddha is more human-like in the north, and they decorate the face as if wearing make-up.  The tour director said this was the result of a strong influence from Myanmar over hundreds of years.  We made a stop at Khaw Phayao Lake for lunch.  This is the largest fresh water lake in Northern Thailand.  We had fried fish and tiny little shrimps that were deep fried…both a specialty of this region.  After lunch we continued on our journey to Wat Rong Khun, also known as the White Temple.  Unlike many Thai temples that are centuries old, Wat Rong Khun was built in 1977.  It was the brainchild of artist Chalermchai Kositpipat.  He grew up in the small town where an old version of this temple existed.  Using proceeds from his art, he rebuilt the temple to his specifications and using his art inside the temple.  It is definitely very striking and one of the most recognizable temples in Thailand.  I highly recommend a visit here.  Finally, we completed our long travel day with a short drive into central Chiang Rai, checked into our hotel, enjoyed a buffet group dinner before ultimately crashing.

[jimmie50]

Day 17 - Chiang Rai

Boarded the bus for a one hour ride to the Golden Triangle and Chiang Saen. The ancient city of Chiang Saen is a town that is one three sides bordered by a wall and a moat and one side by the Mekong River.  It was a strategic border post of the Lanna Kingdom as well as an important center of Buddhism.  It was part of a Burmese kingdom between roughly 1558 and 1804.  We jumped on a boat for a cruise of the Mekong River to the spot where Thailand, Myanmar, and Laos all meet up.  We dropped by Don Sao Island Markets to stretch our legs, pick up some handicrafts, and munch on tasty local goodies.  Upon our return to Chiang Saen, we went to the Hall of Opium.  This was an amazing museum packed full of history into a fascinating ‘edutainment’ experience.  Interesting piece of history I had forgotten from 60+ years go when we studied the Opium Wars in World History class.  In the evening we explored a large night market in Chiang Rai for some more shopping and street food for dinner.  Continued with my chats throughout the day with Bee.  So far he has been very attentive and sweet in his messaging regardless of the fact he does not think he is a sweet person.  lol.  I am enjoying the attention.  Presents me with a dilemma when we arrive in Chiang Mai as I am unsure if I want to visit Classic House and AquaCNX now for massage…or go and just get the massage without any extras.  Don’t want to mess things up, and already been checking return flights to Bangkok in early 2026.

[jimmie50]

Day 18 - Chiang Mai

Chiang Rai hotel was literally a three ring circus at breakfast.  Restaurant opened at 6am.  Our departure wasn’t until 8am, but I had been awake since 5am so decided to go down early when it opened.  One very large tour group with three full busloads was checking out at 6am and all of them headed for the breakfast buffet before departure.  I certainly made a bad decision going early.  Since the large group was long gone when we started loading the bus, it was pretty smooth sailing.  Wish I could say the same for the ride, but there was a lot of road construction through the mountains between Chiang Rai and about half way to Chiang Mai.  Slow going, and rough riding.  Stopped at a rest area after only about one hour to gives us a bit of a break from the road conditions.  Next stop was at Mae Kachan Hot Springs for a chance to dip our toes in or boil some eggs in the bubbling hot springs.  After the hot springs, we stopped at a local restaurant to grab some lunch…delicious Khao Soi noodle soup.  I love it so much.  I’ve been waiting for this the entire trip.  Even made sure I was first in line!  Started to rain during lunch, but by the time we had finished eating and were ready to continue on our way to Chiang Mai the rain had stopped.  As you all know, Chiang Mai is known as the place for temple exploring.  We visited both Wat Phra Singh temple, which was built in 1345, and Wat Chedi Luang temple, a charming wooden creation famous for its huge Lanna style stupa.  In the evening we went to explore one of Chiang Mai’s iconic night markets.  Our arrival is also the beginning of a lantern festival. While some communities have toned down the celebrations out of respect for the Queen Mother’s passing, that was not the case in Chiang Mai.  Festivities were in full swing as planned including fireworks.

[jimmie50]

Day 19 - Chiang Mai

Empress Hotel in Chiang Mai is probably one of the older establishments, but rooms were comfortable and service was great.  They also have a ‘convention center’ attached and were hosting some Southeast Asia Tech Summit.  It must be the favored place to stay for many tour companies as well, and many tour groups were in town for the festival.  To be quite honest, had I done my research and realized that the stay in Chiang Mai would coincide with Yi Peng Lantern Festival and Loy Krathong, I would have returned to Bangkok for my last few days instead of staying in Chiang Mai.  Every place was simply too crowded and overrun with tourists in Chiang Mai.  Traffic was horrible and way too many tour buses and large groups for the infrastructure to handle.  We traveled outside of Chiang Mai to experience a visit to one of the Hill Tribes, see new crops being planted, learn about herbal remedies, and see crafts made.  On our way back into town we stopped at Queen Sirikit Botanic Gardens.  What beautiful scenery.  After checking out the various greenhouses we stopped at an orchid farm where we enjoyed a nice lunch.  Looking back, most of our group meals were buffet style and always included steamed rice, pad thai, and without exception the famous cashew chicken.  We had a couple of hours late afternoon to rest or explore on our own before meeting to go to Khantoke Dinner and Show.  The performers wore traditional costumes and included traditional Northern Thailand music and dancing.  Our food was served on a pedestal tray used as a small dining table.  It was a nice way to conclude our group tour together.  In the morning, everyone will head to the airport and go their separate ways…most returning home, but a couple of adventurers traveling on to Singapore and Malaysia.  Of course, I am remaining in Chiang Mai for two more days.

[jimmie50]

Day 20 - Chiang Mai

Today I will meet Woody from Siam Roads.  Originally we were going to connect the next day, but as a convenience to us both we agreed to change the day.  Woody was great at communication, and picked me up at the Empress Hotel on the agreed upon time.  I specifically wanted to visit an elephant sanctuary, so that was first on the agenda.  It was about an hour drive outside of Chiang Mai.  It had been raining off and on during the time in Chiang Mai, so weather was going to be a factor.  Fortunately, we had the entire morning seeing the elephants without any rain.  Stayed here through lunch, and then Woody had a large temple complex he thought I would be interested in seeing.  Quite impressive, I agree, and glad he suggested it.  Returned to the city late afternoon and went by Classic House where I was able to get a massage (yes, with extra service).  That definitely helped to lift my spirits, but also spending time with Woody was nice and a good distraction from the Bangkok drama.  Went to a really nice night market where we had some dinner together before returning to the Empress for some much needed rest.  Highly recommend Woody’s tour guide services to anyone planning to visit Northern Thailand.