Members unicorn Posted July 29 Author Members Posted July 29 3 hours ago, mauRICE said: I guess whether one thinks it's polite or not depends on how well one handles rejection and granted many people handle it poorly. I think using a broad shorthand like "I don't date foreigners" provides the rejected party with the opportunity to save face... Hardly saving face with a nationalistic epithet. Rejection can be as simple as "Sorry, not interested," or "I have a boyfriend already." One can communicate effectively without being rude. You ought to try it one time. You might be more popular. Saying "I'm not interested in foreigners" is so in-your-face rude I cannot imagine uttering those words. Yet somehow it seems it seems fine to you. I'd say "I'm married, but you live in a wonderful country," followed by either "I so enjoyed my visit there," or "I would love to go there when the political situation changes" (i.e. if he's from Burma, Iran, Cuba, Afghanistan, or Nicaragua). I find it best to soften any rejection with a compliment, rather than add salt to the wound with an insult. PeterRS2 1 Quote
mauRICE Posted July 30 Posted July 30 3 hours ago, unicorn said: Hardly saving face with a nationalistic epithet. Rejection can be as simple as "Sorry, not interested," or "I have a boyfriend already." One can communicate effectively without being rude. You ought to try it one time. You might be more popular. Saying "I'm not interested in foreigners" is so in-your-face rude I cannot imagine uttering those words. Yet somehow it seems it seems fine to you. I'd say "I'm married, but you live in a wonderful country," followed by either "I so enjoyed my visit there," or "I would love to go there when the political situation changes" (i.e. if he's from Burma, Iran, Cuba, Afghanistan, or Nicaragua). I find it best to soften any rejection with a compliment, rather than add salt to the wound with an insult. You sound like an American high schooler in a pissing contest with a misplaced and misguided competitiveness. Most people aren't in a popularity contest, least of all in an anonymous chat forum for some empty kicks or feel the need to talk themselves up in some kind of fantasy existence. We're too busy with the vicissitudes of daily life, dealing with setbacks and celebrating achievements with our real friends and family. Look back at what the rejected party said in context: "...he wasn't interested in foreigners". It was the rejected party's interpretation of things, exchanged in an app with apparently a young Taiwanese. We don't know exactly what was said. My understanding is that one is lucky to receive a reply at all or not blocked outright in the world of online hook-ups if the other party isn't interested. Secondly, your polite rejections may be well and good when declining an invitation to tea with someone of your generation and of your cultural and linguistic background, but we are talking about a totally different context here. The object of interest is a young Taiwanese chatting on a gay hook-up app who may not be familiar with the subtleties and connotations of the English language and conversational etiquette of someone of your generation. Instead of thinking like an older, insular American, try putting yourself in someone else's shoes; in this case, someone much younger and from a different cultural and linguistic background to yours. By the way, "I have a boyfriend already" would be a strange comeback on a hook up app and a real slap in the face. 😅 And who knows, maybe the young man in question had had bad experiences with foreigners, especially annoying ones who can't take no for an answer or let things go (no one from this forum, I'm sure🙄) and felt that the direct approach was best. Bear in mind that a lot of older westerners use their "farangness" or "whiteness" as a selling point when hitting on Asians - "do you like farang?" - as if personality, looks and compatibility don't matter - and in which case a simple "I'm not into foreigners" would be a reasonable response. jimmie50 and floridarob 2 Quote
Members Suckrates Posted July 30 Members Posted July 30 41 minutes ago, mauRICE said: You sound like an American high schooler in a pissing contest with a misplaced and misguided competitiveness. Most people aren't in a popularity contest, least of all in an anonymous chat forum for some empty kicks or feel the need to talk themselves up in some kind of fantasy existence. We're too busy with the vicissitudes of daily life, dealing with setbacks and celebrating achievements with our real friends and family. Look back at what the rejected party said in context: "...he wasn't interested in foreigners". It was the rejected party's interpretation of things, exchanged in an app with apparently a young Taiwanese. We don't know exactly what was said. My understanding is that one is lucky to receive a reply at all or not blocked outright in the world of online hook-ups if the other party isn't interested. Secondly, your polite rejections may be well and good when declining an invitation to tea with someone of your generation and of your cultural and linguistic background, but we are talking about a totally different context here. The object of interest is a young Taiwanese chatting on a gay hook-up app who may not be familiar with the subtleties and connotations of the English language and conversational etiquette of someone of your generation. Instead of thinking like an insular American, try putting yourself in someone else's shoes; in this case, someone much younger and from a different cultural and linguistic background to yours. By the way, "I have a boyfriend already" would be a strange comeback on a hook up app and a real slap in the face. 😅 And who knows, maybe the young man in question had had bad experiences with foreigners, especially annoying ones who can't take no for an answer or let things go (no one from this forum, I'm sure🙄) and felt that the direct approach was best. Bear in mind that a lot of older westerners use their "farangness" or "whiteness" as a selling point when hitting on Asians - "do you like farang?" - as if personality, looks and compatibility don't matter - and in which case a simple "I'm not into foreigners" would be a reasonable response. Perhaps then when concocting an app profile you should clearly state WHAT you are, and are NOT into ? Wouldnt that make life alot easier and less time wasting ? And also serve to weed out choices that you clearly wouldnt consider. However, I think most people want to see ALL the goodies, and who they can attract just for kicks and giggles, and then reject the ones that dont make their cut....... We always want the abundance of riches, so then we can be picky bitches and be the one doing the rejecting ! Its all just a sad, pathetic game. (which transcends AGE and culture) PeterRS2 and unicorn 2 Quote
Olddaddy Posted July 30 Posted July 30 8 hours ago, khaolakguy said: Lots of selfies is not really the same as a trip report! They look a bit photoshopped to me. Bit jealous of his fun life darl ? Sounds like it . mauRICE and unicorn 1 1 Quote
mauRICE Posted July 30 Posted July 30 1 hour ago, Suckrates said: Perhaps then when concocting an app profile you should clearly state WHAT you are, and are NOT into ? Wouldnt that make life alot easier and less time wasting ?... Its all just a sad, pathetic game. It would but my understanding is that few people bother filling up their profiles and even fewer bother reading them. And among those who do read, some choose to ignore what's written and try their luck anyway. Moreover, we are working under the HUGE assumption that people are writing the truth about themselves and using their own, current, unaltered pics. As you said, it's all just a game and not to be taken too seriously. Olddaddy 1 Quote
Olddaddy Posted July 30 Posted July 30 49 minutes ago, mauRICE said: It would but my understanding is that few people bother filling up their profiles and even fewer bother reading them. And among those who do read, some choose to ignore what's written and try their luck anyway. Moreover, we are working under the HUGE assumption that people are writing the truth about themselves and using their own current, unaltered pics. As you said, it's all just a game and not to be taken too seriously at all. Love you Maurice 🤩 mauRICE 1 Quote
PeterRS2 Posted July 30 Posted July 30 4 hours ago, mauRICE said: in which case a simple "I'm not into foreigners" would be a reasonable response. I realise @mauRICE and I have not been having a great day today, but I'd like to add my twopenny worth here. In my book, writing "I'm not into foreigners" would be particularly rude whichever party wrote it. It would hardly be saving face for the other party. If as it seems it was a Taiwanese, he could have put in his profile "Taiwanese (or Chinese) only please." And if approached by a non-Taiwanese, he could have written "Please look at my profile". Sure, @mauRICE is correct. Many do not fill out their profiles. More fool them in my book, because that means they are probably going to get dozens and dozens of profiles they have zero interest in. On the other hand, assuming we are still considering Taiwan, I cannot think any Taiwanese would consider writing "I'm not into foreigners!" They are too polite, even on the apps. On my reasonably regular visits to Taiwan, I change my profile and state "Taiwanese or other ethnic Chinese only please." The fact that my photo is also on the page means that those not into westerners will pass over my page quickly. But given that there are a lot of younger Taiwanese wanting to meet up with foreigners (they aways say there are so few westerners living in Taiwan - which is true!), the chances are that a decent photo will do the trick and you will get more than a few hits. I admit that elsewhere I will often just not respond. On apps I do not believe we have any obligation to do so. It's a bit like going into a 7 11 and walking out because it does not have or has sold out of what I want. I did at one time use "Sorry, not interested", but I believe that too could be considered racist by some to a certain degree. Better nothing at all. Quote
Members Suckrates Posted July 30 Members Posted July 30 5 hours ago, PeterRS2 said: I realise @mauRICE and I have not been having a great day today, but I'd like to add my twopenny worth here. In my book, writing "I'm not into foreigners" would be particularly rude whichever party wrote it. It would hardly be saving face for the other party. If as it seems it was a Taiwanese, he could have put in his profile "Taiwanese (or Chinese) only please." And if approached by a non-Taiwanese, he could have written "Please look at my profile". Sure, @mauRICE is correct. Many do not fill out their profiles. More fool them in my book, because that means they are probably going to get dozens and dozens of profiles they have zero interest in. On the other hand, assuming we are still considering Taiwan, I cannot think any Taiwanese would consider writing "I'm not into foreigners!" They are too polite, even on the apps. On my reasonably regular visits to Taiwan, I change my profile and state "Taiwanese or other ethnic Chinese only please." The fact that my photo is also on the page means that those not into westerners will pass over my page quickly. But given that there are a lot of younger Taiwanese wanting to meet up with foreigners (they aways say there are so few westerners living in Taiwan - which is true!), the chances are that a decent photo will do the trick and you will get more than a few hits. I admit that elsewhere I will often just not respond. On apps I do not believe we have any obligation to do so. It's a bit like going into a 7 11 and walking out because it does not have or has sold out of what I want. I did at one time use "Sorry, not interested", but I believe that too could be considered racist by some to a certain degree. Better nothing at all. If we are simply talking about a matter of "politeness", an ignore or No response at all is the most impolite thing you can do, more impolite than simply saying "not interested" as you mention. Noone likes or appreciates being IGNORED, especially if they are reaching out TO YOU..... If someone takes a chance and contacts you, the very least you can do is let them know you acknowledge them but are sorry "they are not hat YOU are looking for"..... It just retains a certain "civility" in human interaction. mauRICE and unicorn 2 Quote
Keithambrose Posted July 30 Posted July 30 2 hours ago, Suckrates said: If we are simply talking about a matter of "politeness", an ignore or No response at all is the most impolite thing you can do, more impolite than simply saying "not interested" as you mention. Noone likes or appreciates being IGNORED, especially if they are reaching out TO YOU..... If someone takes a chance and contacts you, the very least you can do is let them know you acknowledge them but are sorry "they are not hat YOU are looking for"..... It just retains a certain "civility" in human interaction. Ladies, please! floridarob 1 Quote
hank75 Posted July 30 Posted July 30 This thread started so promisingly and ended with a series of photoshopped headless, fully dressed figures in culturally mismatched tops and bottoms khaolakguy and unicorn 1 1 Quote
Members Suckrates Posted July 30 Members Posted July 30 57 minutes ago, hank75 said: This thread started so promisingly and ended with a series of photoshopped headless, fully dressed figures in culturally mismatched tops and bottoms According to the "subjects" of those pics, its an homage and testament to how "the simple folk live".... 🤣 unicorn 1 Quote
Members unicorn Posted July 30 Author Members Posted July 30 2 hours ago, hank75 said: This thread started so promisingly and ended with a series of photoshopped headless, fully dressed figures in culturally mismatched tops and bottoms In the case of the mosque, I needed a covering for my legs (and removal of my shoes) in order to show respect/follow the rules for the mosque. We were also asked to wear the headgear for the house of the Balinese prince. This was not a fashion choice, but rather a matter of respecting local customs. I remember from a few years' back that my husband was frightened of being photographed when we went on one of those Vietnamese basket boat rides wearing those conical hats. He was afraid of being "cancelled" due to "cultural appropriation." I secretly took a photo of him in the hat, but didn't share the photo. I got a good chuckle over his sensitivity in the matter. I just do as the locals ask us to do and don't fret too much. (Photo is not us--but you get the picture) Interestingly, only one person has answered the question I posed in the original post. I don't get embarrassed by my unfashionable clothes, but this post started from my balancing my embarrassment over faking an interest in a drawing class, over the thrill at seeing one of my favorite actors in the buff, having sex. I genuinely wonder how many would be able to overcome embarrassment in order to experience a thrill they've been fantasizing. Quote
Members unicorn Posted July 30 Author Members Posted July 30 1 hour ago, Suckrates said: According to the "subjects" of those pics, its an homage and testament to how "the simple folk live".... 🤣 I feel a song coming on... 😄 Quote
Members Suckrates Posted July 30 Members Posted July 30 2 hours ago, unicorn said: In the case of the mosque, I needed a covering for my legs (and removal of my shoes) in order to show respect/follow the rules for the mosque. We were also asked to wear the headgear for the house of the Balinese prince. This was not a fashion choice, but rather a matter of respecting local customs. I remember from a few years' back that my husband was frightened of being photographed when we went on one of those Vietnamese basket boat rides wearing those conical hats. He was afraid of being "cancelled" due to "cultural appropriation." I secretly took a photo of him in the hat, but didn't share the photo. I got a good chuckle over his sensitivity in the matter. I just do as the locals ask us to do and don't fret too much. (Photo is not us--but you get the picture) Interestingly, only one person has answered the question I posed in the original post. I don't get embarrassed by my unfashionable clothes, but this post started from my balancing my embarrassment over faking an interest in a drawing class, over the thrill at seeing one of my favorite actors in the buff, having sex. I genuinely wonder how many would be able to overcome embarrassment in order to experience a thrill they've been fantasizing. I think the ONLY problem with your posts is that you have wayyyyyyy too many "Fantasies"...... 👄 mauRICE and unicorn 2 Quote
Keithambrose Posted July 30 Posted July 30 1 hour ago, Suckrates said: I think the ONLY problem with your posts is that you have wayyyyyyy too many "Fantasies"...... 👄 I would be happy to overcome any embarrassment! Are the audience allowed to jack off? unicorn and bkkmfj2648 1 1 Quote
Members Pete1111 Posted July 30 Members Posted July 30 5 hours ago, unicorn said: Interestingly, only one person has answered the question I posed in the original post. I don't get embarrassed by my unfashionable clothes, but this post started from my balancing my embarrassment over faking an interest in a drawing class, over the thrill at seeing one of my favorite actors in the buff, having sex. I genuinely wonder how many would be able to overcome embarrassment in order to experience a thrill they've been fantasizing. It may seem like fantasizing, yet don't give up hope, even when they seem like impossible hopes.....I feel another song coming on... unicorn 1 Quote
Members unicorn Posted July 31 Author Members Posted July 31 3 hours ago, Keithambrose said: I would be happy to overcome any embarrassment! Are the audience allowed to jack off? The only eroticism allowed with these sessions is among the models. And, of course, no photos during the modeling sessions. Had I been younger, I probably could have cum without touching my penis, though, when I saw Jason giving it to my friend. So far Jason and my friend haven't done the deed in private, though, so maybe he won't be coming to the party after all? I take that back! I just checked the approved guest list, and he's RSVP'd yes! Cross our fingers. His +1 is one of his co-stars from one of his TV series. So far 113 approved yeses (not counting +1's). Someone invited but who hasn't said yes is Cory Tyndall/PrettyBoiRoq. I almost feel like every handsome gay man in his 30s will be at our party! Cory Tyndall (also known by his stage name PrettiBoiRoq) is 37 years old, born on March 31, 1989. Background Details Date of Birth: March 31, 1989 Place of Birth: New Bern, North Carolina Occupation: Rapper, songwriter, model, and actor Quote
Members unicorn Posted July 31 Author Members Posted July 31 4 hours ago, Suckrates said: I think the ONLY problem with your posts is that you have wayyyyyyy too many "Fantasies"...... Fantasies, for me at least, are what make life worthwhile. I guess I'm the opposite of a Buddhist. Buddhists teach that the key to happiness is not to want anything. For me, having fantasies makes life for meaningful. Who knows? Sometimes fantasies do come true. To make it very clear: my fantasy is to be friends with Jason, NOT to get intimate with him. I'd NEVER cheat on my husband. Quote
a-447 Posted July 31 Posted July 31 On 7/30/2026 at 2:24 AM, unicorn said: My mother taught me that people who wear designer clothes look vulgar. When she'd see someone decked in designer clothes and accessories, she'd whisper to me "Oh, how vulgar!". I want people to be impressed with the way I treat them, my honesty, and my reliability as a friend. I certainly don't care what strangers think of how I dress. Is that Tommy you're wearing? khaolakguy and unicorn 1 1 Quote
Members unicorn Posted July 31 Author Members Posted July 31 3 hours ago, a-447 said: Is that Tommy you're wearing? Yes, hardly a high-end fashion brand, but, touché, a brand nevertheless. If spending $20 on a shirt makes me a slave to high fashion, I'm guilty! 😄 I personally think that's rather modest spending for a shirt. When my mother was referring to "vulgar" clothing, she meant Balenciaga, Christian Dior, Hermes, Gucci, Versace, and the like. My husband gets impressed by that kind of stuff, and I bought him a few fake designer accessories in Bali. Occasionally he'll buy real stuff on his own. I'll see this Gucci T-shirt and I'll say "Let me guess: it regularly goes for $600, and you think you got a bargain for $150?". The response would be affirmative (at least when he gets tired of it, he can often sell it for $100 🫠). Quote
hank75 Posted July 31 Posted July 31 12 hours ago, unicorn said: This was not a fashion choice, but rather a matter of respecting local customs. My post was mainly made in jest that I wandered in here hoping to see something titillating and indeed you shared pictures of that very handsome model, but it quickly devolved into “farang goes to Bali” which was not erotic at all even stretching the imagination 😂 But yes I have often been in a similar situation to you where I forget I need to cover knees and shoulders before entering a temple in Thailand or Cambodia. Usually it wasn’t my intention to go but decided to accompany a friend on short notice hence the inappropriate attire. By the way you are a much better artist than I am. Unsure if I would even have been able to produce a recognisable tableau …nor have bothered if faced with such an enticing scene. Better ways to occupy my hands. Quote
Keithambrose Posted July 31 Posted July 31 5 hours ago, unicorn said: The only eroticism allowed with these sessions is among the models. And, of course, no photos during the modeling sessions. Had I been younger, I probably could have cum without touching my penis, though, when I saw Jason giving it to my friend. So far Jason and my friend haven't done the deed in private, though, so maybe he won't be coming to the party after all? I take that back! I just checked the approved guest list, and he's RSVP'd yes! Cross our fingers. His +1 is one of his co-stars from one of his TV series. So far 113 approved yeses (not counting +1's). Someone invited but who hasn't said yes is Cory Tyndall/PrettyBoiRoq. I almost feel like every handsome gay man in his 30s will be at our party! Cory Tyndall (also known by his stage name PrettiBoiRoq) is 37 years old, born on March 31, 1989. Background Details Date of Birth: March 31, 1989 Place of Birth: New Bern, North Carolina Occupation: Rapper, songwriter, model, and actor I hope you have a great and exciting time!! unicorn 1 Quote
Olddaddy Posted July 31 Posted July 31 1 hour ago, hank75 said: ..... I wandered in here hoping to see something titillating and indeed you shared pictures of that very handsome model, but it quickly devolved into “farang goes to Bali” which was not erotic at all even stretching the imagination 😂 Yes sorry it wasnt "titillating" for you enough dear Sir ...hopefully next time the OP can do better at entertaining you ! ... would you perhaps like to hear my stories of my adventures in the gay sauna and how my fat hairy ass was abused & used by a bunch of Chinese senior citizens? mauRICE and unicorn 2 Quote
a-447 Posted July 31 Posted July 31 1 hour ago, unicorn said: Yes, hardly a high-end fashion brand, but, touché, a brand nevertheless. If spending $20 on a shirt makes me a slave to high fashion, I'm guilty! Where can you buy a real Tommy for $20? And where can your husband buy a real Gucci at a discount? 'True top-tier luxury houses like Chanel, Hermès, and Louis Vuitton protect their brand image by never offering seasonal public clearance events in their standalone boutiques.' Quote
