Londoner

Let me be clear....LTRs, particularly when you are separated by 5000 miles, are not easy. At least mine isn't. And I'm lucky that, for me, the cost is the least of the worries. I don't recommend it. And, come to think of it, I never wanted a boyfriend. I visited Thailand happily for nine years, about forty trips, and enjoyed every minute . Bars, offs, massages... interesting encounters; I had it all. And then one night, I met someone different; or so it seemed. When we finished that first encounter and I'd paid , he waited by the door as though there was something more that should be said or perhaps done.. How long? I'm not sure but it seemed a long, long time. Fifteen years ago and it seems like yesterday. Fifteen years of tribulation and worry. And, I'm not too proud to say it, tears. But I love him and, when troubles come-and they certainly have to us- you have two choices; either say, that's it. The end. Or you love him all the more. And I do.

I first rented a deck chair on the gay beach in 1996; by 2000, the Golden Age was over. Just one example; it was difficult to find a spare deckchair in the late afternoon. By 2005, the beach was well past its sell-by date.....even if the quality of the water was improving!

LTRs can also be problematic for the Thai partner. I know of cases where a relationship of many years or so is precipitously severed by a falang who has found a younger and cuter partner, causing not only emotional distress but also leading to financial problems for not just the guy but his family. In one case, the the thirty-year-old Thai, in a relationship with a falang for ten years, went out for few hours and, returning home, found his partner with all his belongings gone; no forwarding address, no explanation. When we take on a guy and make certain promises or raise certain expectations, we owe our partner honesty. Sometimes relationships fail but when they do, the falang probably has more options open to him than the Thai, particularly if he is now ageing and less attractive. I've no doubt that there are Thais who have acted badly towards loving and generous falangs but sometimes it's the falang who has failed his partner and failed to adapt to a relationship which is no longer as sexually stimulating as when it started.

It's absolutely true that cute guys attract older admirers. I always wonder why more saunas don't give under twenty- fives a cheap rate. The best afternoon I had in Babylon was when they lowered their entrance fee while the swimming pool was being renovated...large numbers of cute Thai guys outnumbered people like me.

I always gave the average amount for an off....1000- 1300 bht. I recall two occasions when the guy said, no, that's too much. I persuaded both to accept it!

That's all true. I love my three visits a year to Pattaya but I'm not certain I'd be quite so excited by the prospect if I wasn't in a ltr. Observing the bar-scene from outside, I'm not impressed. Nevertheless, there have been improvements since my first visit. 1) Apps ensure that sanuk is available twenty-four hours a day 2) The range of restaurants is astonishing. The new Terminus 21 alone could keep a tourist sated for three weeks 3) The malls can provide a respite to the heat during the daytime. 4) Issues relating to underage sex seem to have disappeared. 5) More flights are available to and from Bangkok, both international and domestic. And perhaps surprisingly, those flights are not much more expensive than when I first came in 1995 while the cost of hotels and restaurants , not to mention company, has remained pretty stable.

But, I emphasise, not "gay" business. My suspicion is that, if it thrives, and the successfully-expanding Ambiance becomes even more reliant on the Chinese/Asian market, the "Boyztown" sign will soon be taken -down as an embarrassment. Perhaps it doesn't matter; it makes commercial sense. Nevertheless, it is sad for my generation. Back in 1995 I recall the sheer joy of sitting in Panorama surrounded by guys just like me, watching the go go dancers saunter past on the way to work. I'd never felt so much at home.

The new venue at LCR is a major problem. I could feel as well as the thumping of the loudspeakers in my bed at 0300 the night before my return home in June. I've cancelled my next stay with great disappointment after twenty-five years and seventy visits. I'm too old to lose a night's sleep and my boyfriend and I prefer to retire before midnight. Of course, noise isn't a problem for everyone; if you go to bed at 0400 or aren't sensitive to noise, you won't be affected. Ambiance is replacing its penthouse doors, by the way. That may help. LCR may make money for the owners; unfortunately it runs the risk of ensuring that other businesses don't. Boyztown has declined year by year with old favourites like Oscars, Funny Boys and Panorama closed. I fear that it will soon be darkened, boarded-up soi only coming to a very limited life between 1200 and 0300. And, by the way, not for gays; we are not LCR's target group.

What is the situation for gays now that there is an evangelical, homophobic, racist thug is in power? I have read reports that the gay community is very nervous.

Agoda calls it "imm" on my receipt for September....but I'll be pleased if the old name is preserved.

Circadin (melatonin) helps with jet-lag. I bought mine at Boots, Silom. 500 bht for 18 tablets, if I recall correctly. As far as expense is concerned, you are right but hotels and restaurants remain good value. And, by the way, the old Tarntawan Hotel, beloved by many, will be called the imm hotel, Surawong (yes, small "i") and will offer excellent prices. Check out Agoda. My September room costs less than £25 pn. I paid nearer £50 in May.

Absolutely. And , apparently, Panorama in Boyztown has been bought by Castro. That's another one gone. O tempora, o mores......those happy early evenings sitting there, bir-singh at the ready, watching the go-go dancers pass by on their way to work, waiting for the bars to open......

A drink in Dick's, watching the crowds- tourists, dancers, staff- the cheapest and best (almost) way to spend an hour in Bangkok. And the same goes for Panorama. Ten years ago.

Boy69 and speedoo1 are both correct. My experience over the past twenty-three years is that the early part of the rainy season is likely to produce decent, if not perfect, weather while the later part, particularly September, can be disappointing for beach-lovers. This is not true of Koh Samui where the weather is good at that time of the year; it has a different climate due to its location.

Hotels are cheaper. Take advantage. Compare prices with those in January. As for the weather. I've just returned from three weeks in the Rainy Season, much of it in Krabi where long periods of rain aren't unusual at this time of year. We lost only one day due to bad weather. In Pattaya/Jomtien, a few hours. We were certainly fortunate but the truth is that I go there every year at this time and very seldom has my trip been disrupted.

I am one of the 90s generation....falangs who experienced a vibrant Pattaya scene and fell in love with it. At the age of seventy-two, I count myself lucky- I am one of the survivors, aiming to grow older more disgracefully. I am not alone in one respect and it is one that is sometimes forgotten. Look at the today's gay Thai/falang couples in Thailand; one thing has changed since the 90s. More of them are of an older falang (nothing new there) with a Thai who is in his 30s or 40s rather than 20s. No longer "offs" intent on making a1000bht for an hour's work but partners. Friends. In some cases, even married. Perhaps , one day long ago, the Thais were go- go dancers looking for that fortunate falang. Some found their man and are now in some sort of long term relationship. In my case, it's one of fifteen years. We don't go to go go bars but spend our money in restaurants and we don't restrict ourselves to gay hot-spots, such as they are. Krabi, Chiang Rai, Luang Prabang have been recent destinations. Usually, we are "the only gays in the village"....but nobody seems to mind. I suppose that people like me are some of the "lost" gogo bar punters and the ones partly responsible for an almost deserted Boyztown.

Blind Massage place in Jomtien Complex, near Zing and Agate? No H.E. but may help your back. Be prepared for some pain.

Thanks, kokopelli...it's good to know that some traditions live on.

Low occupancy in Jomtien and elsewhere means that most (perhaps) hotels will offer a good rate for a night. How much of the night you use is up to you! Off the top of my head, if you are thinking about the Jomtien Compex gay soi, there are two gay hotels nearby plus gay friendly places like Zing and (slightly pricier ) Agate. Others may correct me, but aren't Short Time hotels a thing of the past? I remember them twenty years ago....the cars of visitors would be curtained-off from prying eyes...but now?

One thing I liked about Pattaya is that the guys who worked in a particular bar are often friends....some of them from the same village who had traveled together to the bright lights. They often lived together, or close to each other and socialised. This meant that the atmosphere in the bars (and I must admit that I'm now talking about the past) was more humorous and friendly. In Bangkok, the guys often live far away from the work-place meeting the other workers only in the bar and so their relationships are less warm. And the bars less vibrant.

Centran...yes, I know the place well. But even more familiar to us is Loyen Garden. I find myself calling it that now. Nearly sixteen years of attempting to encourage the pronunciation of "Royal" have ended in failure; if you can't beat 'em.....

Yes, we saw it last night....thanks.

Ggobkk and I seem to be following each other...first Tarntawan and now Jomtien! We arrived yesterday, after four sun-filled days in Krabi where the absence of gay couples is noticeable as we walk around Aonang. And certainly in our hotel -we are the only gays in that particular village.It is more expensive than the ones we're used to; some would say over-priced. Even so, no one seems to mind a Thai/falang couple, of whom only one is good-looking.Tthe staff in the hotel are welcoming. To be fair, that has been our experience throughout Thailand. Nevertheless it was good to be back among the brethren yesterday evening. Plenty of cute masseurs within yards of our hotel and Dick's Cafe served us the best dinner we've had this trip.. And now we shall look out for the new sign.

Michael; the answer is simple. I met someone in Pattaya sixteen years ago....and without him, I'd have probably stopped coming. We are aware of the scene- in both paces- and like being in a gay environment even if we are not participants. I must confess that I do explore Bangkok the day before he arrives from his home in the north of the country. Hence my comments about Patpong and Babylon.

When one of us has an infection, we pass it on to to others....and it spreads widely and quickly. Some of those affected may have neither the money nor the knowledge to to deal with it.