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TotallyOz

Serious Ageing Question

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I am getting old and my sex drive is not what it use to be. But, I still like sex live and in person.

However, every time I watch Rome Flynn (photo attached) I have a wet dream that night. He has been in Raising Dion this season and I just almost orgasm when I see him each episode. But, at night the dreams are vivid and he is at the center. I shall not share what he is doing to me in those dreams but it is liquid ecstasy. Is this a normal sign of ageing?

Signed,

Seriously Lusting

rome flynn.jpg

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if you’re having a literal “wet-dream” , like in puberty - your libido is intact.

however, depending on your sexual role - sex may not be as interesting as when younger.  example - I know several older (over 55) men that no longer want to go through the entire “clean-out” process for receptive anal sex.  so, they’re not so interested in bottoming anymore but still have healthy sex drive.  It’s gets redirected to sucking dick or other things where the prep work isn’t an issue.  Likewise some top guys don’t have physical ability to aggressively top, but have interest in other sexual intimacy.

sexuality isn’t defined by sexual roles or doing a specific act.  interests change depending on many factors, with age being just one.

erectile dysfunction is the most common issue as we get older & that can be managed with a good urologist and his/her recommendations.  Also, ED can be stress related about getting older, in lieu of an actual physical problem.

the best cure for all of this is enough sleep, moderate or no alcohol use, no smoking & moderate exercise.  Like most things - the most obvious & simple approach is the best

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On 2/3/2022 at 2:45 AM, TotallyOz said:

I am getting old

If at your age you are still getting wet dreams, I'd say you are doing pretty well in life.

Most everyone I know is taking blood pressure medication. A major side effect of statins is decreased ability to get an erection and/or sustain an erection. My PCP, who runs a famous practice serving the gay community, tells me that "limp cock" is the #1 complaint among his patients over the age of forty-five. Many men have no choice, they have to pick between life and sex. Getting older, living longer, with the help of medicine, often means you can't have both. I say, if this is your reality, learn to live with the reality and find other ways to have fun.

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1 hour ago, RockHardNYC said:

If at your age you are still getting wet dreams, I'd say you are doing pretty well in life.

Most everyone I know is taking blood pressure medication. A major side effect of statins is decreased ability to get an erection and/or sustain an erection. My PCP, who runs a famous practice serving the gay community, tells me that "limp cock" is the #1 complaint among his patients over the age of forty-five. Many men have no choice, they have to pick between life and sex. Getting older, living longer, with the help of medicine, often means you can't have both. I say, if this is your reality, learn to live with the reality and find other ways to have fun.

Right, just use your fingers, you won't even need Viagra.

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On 2/3/2022 at 1:48 PM, Slvkguy said:

if you’re having a literal “wet-dream” , like in puberty - your libido is intact.

however, depending on your sexual role - sex may not be as interesting as when younger.  example - I know several older (over 55) men that no longer want to go through the entire “clean-out” process for receptive anal sex.  so, they’re not so interested in bottoming anymore but still have healthy sex drive.  It’s gets redirected to sucking dick or other things where the prep work isn’t an issue.  Likewise some top guys don’t have physical ability to aggressively top, but have interest in other sexual intimacy.

sexuality isn’t defined by sexual roles or doing a specific act.  interests change depending on many factors, with age being just one.

erectile dysfunction is the most common issue as we get older & that can be managed with a good urologist and his/her recommendations.  Also, ED can be stress related about getting older, in lieu of an actual physical problem.

the best cure for all of this is enough sleep, moderate or no alcohol use, no smoking & moderate exercise.  Like most things - the most obvious & simple approach is the best

The part about douching spoke to me. I brought supplies for 4 wks Brazil recently but could not muster the will to utilize. In 70th year but fortunate to have robust tumescence, perhaps partly owing to lifetime healthy nutrition and exercise. 

Fortunately, about 90% of the time no embarrassing GI-related mishaps upon protected RAI when attempted, and simply avoided or truncated when I thought it might be on the messier side. 

On a side note, I was violently ill vomiting one day and my tentative conclusion was it followed 2 strong caipirinhas of an evening at Lagoa early in Truvada cycle after having 2 years abstention PrEP. So later re-challenged but then abstemious re: alcohol. I don’t think it was food poisoning. I am not much of a consumer of alcohol ordinarily but was essentially mildly drunk on the cocktails. 

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On 2/4/2022 at 7:11 AM, RockHardNYC said:

If at your age you are still getting wet dreams, I'd say you are doing pretty well in life.

Most everyone I know is taking blood pressure medication. A major side effect of statins is decreased ability to get an erection and/or sustain an erection. My PCP, who runs a famous practice serving the gay community, tells me that "limp cock" is the #1 complaint among his patients over the age of forty-five. Many men have no choice, they have to pick between life and sex. Getting older, living longer, with the help of medicine, often means you can't have both. I say, if this is your reality, learn to live with the reality and find other ways to have fun.

Here is an article that says statins are good for erections. Or am I reading it wrong?

https://www.acc.org/about-acc/press-releases/2014/03/29/09/00/kostis-erectile-function#:~:text=Analysis of all 11 studies,%2C a 24.3 percent increase).

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Sorry, I get the meds mixed up. Statins are for reducing cholesterol, and beta blockers are for lowering hypertension. Many older gay men take both. However, both can play a serious role in erectile dysfunction. Diabetes is also something to consider.

There are some ACE inhibitors that don't effect the ability to get an erection, but regulating blood pressure is a very individual thing. Good doctor's tend to prescribe what works best for an individual, ignoring the side effects.

I have never heard of any blood pressure or cholesterol drugs that are good for erection health. Perhaps there are outliers, since science is often not black and white.

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I'm on medication for high blood pressure and cholesterol.

My experience of their effects on erections is the opposite- since starting the medication last year I've been waking up in the middle of the night and sometimes in the morning with a hard-on. 

I'm presuming it's the effect of the medicine as I have not made any changes to my lifestyle, but I could be wrong.

Of course, I'm not complaining!
 

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4 hours ago, a-447 said:

Of course, I'm not complaining!

If you're getting, maintaining, or increasing healthy erections while being on statins and/or beta blockers, I would consider yourself very lucky. The evidence supporting the opposite outcome is overwhelming. A simple Google search will reveal the unfortunate odds.

I know a few gay doctors who are on Lipitor and Lisinopril, and all they talk about these days is limp dick. Lipitor is also famous for short-term memory loss. The drug works miracles, but a lot of people refuse to tolerate it because the side effects fuck up their lives.

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It may not be luck - it may be caused by something else but I haven't mentioned it to my doctor because it's not a problem.  Anyhow, I think I'd be too embarrassed!  Lol

I remember a veteran of the gay boards once saying that tramadol stopped him from cumming, so he could enjoy long sex sessions.

Not all side effects are bad!

 

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On 2/6/2022 at 9:37 AM, a-447 said:

Not all side effects are bad!

It's true. I hear from diabetic friends that metformin, the most common drug used to treat early stages of diabetes, causes weight loss. Some friends have lost 60 to 100 pounds without dieting. However, a serious downside to that drug is severe digestive issues, mainly, never-ending diarrhea. Talk about an erection killer.

On 2/6/2022 at 10:13 AM, spoon said:

Delayed ejaculation

Be careful what you wish for. Nothing worse than being stuck with a not-so-fun sex partner who needs another hour of stimulation before he finally cums. 

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