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Schuft

Getting your new Thai BF to the US

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(hell it took me 4 months just to see him without a shirt on). He is very polite, like I said earlier, we chat and our skype daily so its kinda like we met" to a degree.  

 

So enough about him, I dont know the ins and outs of Thai culture, i need to learn.  I'm really not naive, I was in the Military, I have traveled alot thru western Europe and have dealt with various money boys, rent boys, escorts, whatever they want to call themselves locally. 

  Rant over.

 

You are a patient man.

 

Thailand is a different game than the US or Western Europe. Read my blog for some stories. However, if the boy speaks English, that's a good start (part of the reason for my poor success is that I speak Thai and have access to all village idiots).

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I sincerely hope you realise that Thai logic is very different from western logic. It has defeated the attempts by many westerners including those living in Thailand to understand it. This can lead to all manner of problems. But then - love conquers all (or so they say)! I do wish you all the best, but please take things slowly.

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Maybe you right and the boy is fine but it's better to be very

cautious ,you can read ChristianPFC blog and learn how Thai boys can be very manipulative, deceptive and devious (my own personal experience with them is generally very negative unfortunately)

I've had the opposite experience. I find the Thai guys overwhelmingly honest.

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How many gay thai guys in their teens and 20's live alone and work an 8 hr job 5 days a week? I cant believe its many.

So he tells you.

 

You are planning and expecting too much. The same can happen from the other side, I have had boys I haven't met asking me if we could become boyfriends.

 

Skip all the wedding planning, go to see him in real and spend some days together to see if you work out.

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I've had the opposite experience. I find the Thai guys overwhelmingly honest.

 

In your circumstances (pick them up in a bar and take them home, and being a well known customer), they probably are honest. And the outcome - sex for money - is clear. And no confusion about place and time to meet.

 

However in my situation, looking for free sex, with the very distant prospect of the relationship, I encountered all the deceptions and manipulations I described in my blog. Some of them can pass as cultural or language misunderstanding.

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I have read Christians Blog with interest.  I cringed at what he was going thru. My thai friend (ok, i drop the boyfriend title for now) hasn't shown any signs or actions that you guys talk about.  He hasn't ask for anything from me, I asked him what gift he would like me to bring him for his birthday, all he wanted was for me to come to him in Thailand.  He's never asked how much i make or my "worth".  He wont take anytime off from his job while I am there, but he did ask me if I wanted him to quit his job, which I said NO.  He's painfully shy, he may be older that 20 (hes an office manager according to his FB)  He knows some english (we'll work on that).  He's stated to me many times that he is my Queen and I am his King (I just thought those were sexual likes, is there a larger meaning to these terms?)

   Maybe Its not love but lust I am feeling, whatever it its strong, very Strong.  In my 53 years i have had only 4 boyfriends (longest relationship was 25 years, he dumped me for a young flight attendant).  Im an open book here, I tend to find one person and stay with them until they dumps me or die. 

   So, isn't it just possible this guy is legit?

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I admire all of you for trying to help this man, but how can you believe he is real.  What ever happened to don't feed the trolls.  Christian, you especially, know what Schuft means and I would have expected you to catch on that you are being trolled.

What the hell if you guys are bored, and have the time ---why not.

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Thanks for input guys. I appreciate it!  I have no idea why some of you think Im a troll, but Im not.

Moderators you can lock this thread, I think I have gotten all the useful information I will from it.

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I admire all of you for trying to help this man, but how can you believe he is real.

I do have my doubts, but I've seen stranger things in real life when it comes to a farang being in pursuit of his Thai love interest. So I'm not convinced that Schuft is a troll, but even if he is, I don't see any harm in discussing the scenario he has shared with us.

 

Coincidentally, my very first Thai boyfriend also offered to quit his job to be with me while I was visiting Thailand. So I know it does happen and that's why I consider it a scenario worth discussing.

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Thanks for input guys. I appreciate it!  I have no idea why some of you think Im a troll, but Im not.

Moderators you can lock this thread, I think I have gotten all the useful information I will from it.

Schuft, in that case, just one final reflection:

 

This is my quest

To follow that star

No matter how hopeless

No matter how far

 

The Impossible Dream - Man of La Mancha

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I have read Christians Blog with interest.  I cringed at what he was going thru. My thai friend (ok, i drop the boyfriend title for now) hasn't shown any signs or actions that you guys talk about.  He hasn't ask for anything from me, I asked him what gift he would like me to bring him for his birthday, all he wanted was for me to come to him in Thailand.  He's never asked how much i make or my "worth".  He wont take anytime off from his job while I am there, but he did ask me if I wanted him to quit his job, which I said NO.  He's painfully shy, he may be older that 20 (hes an office manager according to his FB)  He knows some english (we'll work on that).  etc, etc...

 

I wonder if you have been born yesterday... or was it today?

Why you cringe at what Christian goes through?  Many of us have similar situations and we don't find much bad about them.  It is a way to acquire useful experience.

 

And then here you come, ready to step into an unknown country and meet an unknown guy who in your mind is the perfect prince.  Oh, it surely is so in your mind.  You may be lucky and I wish you are, but what is baffling is that you are so convinced and don't see the odds. You don't have any experience with Thai boys. 

 

Unless you are terminally ill and in desperation, you may want to set up a learning period of several years to interact with these boys before you think of anything serious.

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Guest McGarty

 

 

This is my quest

To follow that star

No matter how hopeless

No matter how far

 

 

 

 

very insightful -

Not!

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"That he offers to quit his job for your visit is - in my opinion - a big, fat warning sign. "

 

I agree with Alexx as I advised before the most important test is if the boy is willing to work and support himself than his genuine and honest. If he is willing to quit his job there is a possibility that he doesn't have any at all and he's lying or he doesn't like to work and prefer to quit and to be supported financially by you.

 

Consider this situation as an adventure with low expectations with this boy and be very cautious.

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very insightful -

Not!

McGarty, perhaps you could post more meaningful commentary than make disparaging remarks about others. 

 

I have re-read most of your posts and few of them could be considered " insightful" but no one chided you. 

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McGarty, perhaps you could post more meaningful commentary than make disparaging remarks about others. 

 

 

I don't understand his objection either.  That verse is very fitting.

He might not have ever read "Don Quixote de la Mancha."

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I don't understand his objection either.  That verse is very fitting.

He might not have ever read "Don Quixote de la Mancha

Sorry Steve, this is a song lyric and not a quote by Cervantes.  However, one of the things you do discover on reading this book is just how many quotes by Cervantes have entered the English Language. 

https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Miguel_de_Cervantes#Don_Quixote_de_la_Mancha_.281605.E2.80.931615.29

https://www.goodreads.com/work/quotes/121842-don-quijote-de-la-mancha

 

Koko not the quote I would have used.  Look up the meaning of the German word Schuft if you have time.

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