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Jasper

Dream Boys Bangkok Last Night

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I'm not sure who told you that, but I've heard from at least three guys interviewed that they pay Bt100 to be in a show. .

In their regular show where 8-10 boys dance to high intensity dancing number wearing cow boy boots, a dancer told me that he gets 300B. Perhaps they pay differently according to a show/ a boy.

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I heard that a very popular handsome boy of Dreamboy Bangkok had a bike accident and broke his leg. I wish him a speedy recovery.

 

Most of us get paid in the similar situation while in employment but I wonder if he gets any from Dreamboy.

Sometime we forget how precarious boys working life is.

 

No doubt some of his loyal customers would receive “help me” LINE messages.

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I heard that a very popular handsome boy of Dreamboy Bangkok had a bike accident and broke his leg. I wish him a speedy recovery.

 

Most of us get paid in the similar situation while in employment but I wonder if he gets any from Dreamboy.

Sometime we forget how precarious boys working life is.

 

No doubt some of his loyal customers would receive “help me” LINE messages.

I think it will take about 3 months to recover.

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visited Dream Boys last Sunday at 10:30pm.

full house, with lots of Asian female customers.

managed to get a front row seat with a good view.

 

1st drink for 500 baht, 2nd drink for 450 baht.

ordered only 1 drink, and left after the 1-hour show ended.

 

the show was worth 500 baht, i would say.

a good mixture of drag comedy, acrobatic dances and huge cocks.

 

quality/variety of boys was above-average, but not my cup of tea.

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in this case it would be somehow justified

I never quite know how to respond to these ‘help me’ Line messages. If its only for a few hundred baht I sometimes donate. Often the reqest is ‘not have food.’ I do know how precarious life can be, and I often think about our wealth gap. But I can never quite get rid of the ‘being conned’ feeling! And I don’t mind if its only a few hundred - I get pleasure from the boys far in excess of the financial cost.

Maybe this should form a separate topic!

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I never quite know how to respond to these ‘help me’ Line messages. If its only for a few hundred baht I sometimes donate. Often the reqest is ‘not have food.’ I do know how precarious life can be, and I often think about our wealth gap. But I can never quite get rid of the ‘being conned’ feeling! And I don’t mind if its only a few hundred - I get pleasure from the boys far in excess of the financial cost.

Maybe this should form a separate topic!

I agree that pleasure we get from them is worth more that few additional hundred but those requests seem to escalate. This is not specific to Thai boys but it seems is universal whenever we extend helping hand. 

 

It's why my policy in respect of Thai boys is to pay them generously for their  time spent with me but no exchanges of any contacts / Line , facebook , phone , e-mail etc /.

 

If they offer to provide their phone number I will take it but I never ask to.

 

Only time I did provide my e-mail address it turned to disaster, after few casual exchanges of news request for  a loan , yeah, right. Then out of blue request for substantial donation complete with bank account number. Only way to stop it was to show up in the bar and actually make boy upset by offing somebody else in  his plain view. Painful but necessary move  and it worked. 

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I agree that pleasure we get from them is worth more that few additional hundred but those requests seem to escalate. This is not specific to Thai boys but it seems is universal whenever we extend helping hand.

 

It's why my policy in respect of Thai boys is to pay them generously for their time spent with me but no exchanges of any contacts / Line , facebook , phone , e-mail etc /.

 

If they offer to provide their phone number I will take it but I never ask to.

 

Only time I did provide my e-mail address it turned to disaster, after few casual exchanges of news request for a loan , yeah, right. Then out of blue request for substantial donation complete with bank account number. Only way to stop it was to show up in the bar and actually make boy upset by offing somebody else in his plain view. Painful but necessary move and it worked.

Further more Thai boys tend to interpret generosity/ kindness as a weakness if you give them once they will want more, the demands will be increase more and more.

I don't mind to give some of the cute and polite boys my line number and be in touch with them ,unsurprisingly after couple of messages requests for money pop up and sometimes very aggressive ones with a hint that if you want to be in touch with them you need to pay !

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It's why my policy in respect of Thai boys is to pay them generously for their  time spent with me but no exchanges of any contacts / Line , facebook , phone , e-mail etc /.

 

 

I don't bring phone and and don't give out any contact info other than hotel I'm in at the time (if they came back to my room they already know it). If I want to repeat I know where to find them. Some wonder how I manage without a smartphone in my pocket and I always tell them the same thing: peacefully.

 

Only time I did provide my e-mail address it turned to disaster,

 

In moment of weakness I gave email out to one guy on last trip.  Luckily--so far--no money requests but periodic messages inquiring "when you come back." Since I prefer to keep that a surprise, it will remain that way.

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Further more Thai boys tend to interpret generosity/ kindness as a weakness if you give them once they will want more, the demands will be increase more and more.

I don't think this is specific to Thai boys only . Isn't it how our Western charities operate? You send them donation and shortly after you are  bombarded with requests for more

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Have some pity on the boys.

Quite a number of them were going hungry as recently this September. Just wondering if they could benefit from food coupons.

 

Hi witty.  I'd be grateful for sources of information here.  Do you know this via friendship with them, or just by hearsay?  If correct info, then it backs up what I'm thinking.  A hotel boy from Pattaya (cute, on Romeo) told me that he is temporary staff (showed me his badge) and said that he gets 350 baht if they hold a seminar, but nothing else, and he is not on salary.  Average meal cost on the street is 35 baht, and he will have to pay rent, electric, water and phone (phone is as essential as water these days to thai boy). 

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Have some pity on the boys.

Quite a number of them were going hungry as recently this September. Just wondering if they could benefit from food coupons.

I was there for 2 weeks in September and believe you me , quite a few of then did very well of me.

 

I did not sense anywhere any desperation , quite opposite , few of them had nerve to reject my proposal for lucrative long time contract preferring half price short times. Their choice , my savings.

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Hi Wheelz,

I usually spend some time drinking hot tea in bars in Jomtian whenever I visit Pattaya. Each time I never failed to see lots of Khmer and Lao together with Thai lads waiting and hoping for an off. The Khmer lads(too many of them) were ever grateful for drinks and appropriate tips you give them. Yes, I do know a few of them in the past couple of years.

Those free lancers are akin to common grade apples on the bottom shelves of supermarket. The rich and discerning customers will reach straight for the big and red imported ones on the top shelves and willingly paying a premium price.

Yes, one should pick up those common apples too so that none is left behind to rot.

Despite the very low off rate, the Khmer lads keep on coming back to Pattaya.

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Have some pity on the boys.

Quite a number of them were going hungry as recently this September. Just wondering if they could benefit from food coupons.

Please tell us where you got that information.

 

As far as I can see, nobody goes hungry in Thailand.

 

If they really run out of money it's mismanagement or misappropriation (spending money that should be used for food or rent on booze, cigarettes, drugs, taxi rides instead of walking or bus), not poverty.

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It depends on what you mean by "hungry". People aren't starving and dying from diseases of malnutrition certainly. But there are people (and this includes some of the working guys we meet) who miss meals for a day or so due to the demands of rent. The fortunate ones are in locally-based friendship groups and one of their strengths is that when one of them has a good night, he will share his money by treating his friends. 

I suspect that this is more prevalent in Pattaya , where the guys live closer together.

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If they really run out of money it's mismanagement or misappropriation (spending money that should be used for food or rent on booze, cigarettes, drugs, taxi rides instead of walking or bus), not poverty.

 

A rather narrow definition of poverty, I think.  The inability to manage funds, leading to missing meals, is a form of poverty. Usually defined as 'Secondary Poverty' (Seebohmn Rowntree), the temptation is to attribute it to moral behaviours with which we disagree, which in turn leads to avoidance.

 

Correct to say that 'more money' won't solve this kind of poverty.  It's more complex. Money management is a learned skill, and if you've grown up without any kind of model, have had no one to show you how, and have friends who live the same way, it's hard to do.  Heck, it's hard for me to do.  It's a learned skill.  But if someone gets into a real mess because of poor money management, a short-term, targeted gift may give them the emotional space to start correcting problem behaviours (Maslow's hierarchy of needs). And then you can offer mentoring.  We run a family charitable trust based on exactly this position.  Many disagree with us. It's our money.

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x. Money management is a learned skill, and if you've grown up without any kind of model, have had no one to show you how, and have friends who live the same way, it's hard to do. 

I agree but must say some of boys I met over years were / are surprisingly smart money handlers. 

 

One Arena boy , still working there told me that no matter what he always puts half of customer tip to the bank right away, he even went as far as asking me to break 1000 note in halfs to make his task easier.

 

Two years ago I took BBB boy for 5 days Bangkok vacations. We agreed on compensation etc and he told me up front that he wants me to pay him at very end so this way he will save that money.

 

Doubly right as he had excuse to ask me to cover his small expenses,  rightly claiming he has no money. I gladly did because I like be around of smart people. Like they say 'it's better to lose something with smart than find something with stupid".

 

But a little bit of me supports Christian's theory. Many boys would do better if they follow simple money earning tactic- more effort = more money.

 

As long time offer who probably pays a bit over the odds and it's no secret to boys here and there I'm often surprised by rejection of long time offer for twice if not more as much  claiming they are tired or need to to the gym in the morning etc excuses.

And no, it's not because of me  since in second breath they ask if they can see me again, I used to get upset over it but now entirely gave up and swim with the flow.

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And then you can offer mentoring.

I tried with a few boys, all in vain. In Germany we say "advice goes in one ear, out the other ear", is there a similar saying in English? A bit different from "casting pearls before swine" which is "play a violin for the buffalo" in Thai.

 

My favorite story still is the boy in 2012 (?) whom I took for sightseeing for one day, then at Wat Benchamabophit gave him 1000 THB to thank him for his company (no sex!), asked him where he lives, checked in my bus map which bus goes there, put him on the bus stop, said goodbye and when looking back after walking 20 meter see him hailing a taxi. 3 days later he calls me on the phone, no "thank you", but "I spent all the 1000 THB, can I have more?".

 

I can't change others, I can't even change myself in many point where I would like. I will not give or "lend" money if someone does not take my advice (like a Thai friend who earns around 20 kTHB per months, but sqaunders all of it - a common Farang friend thinks he gambles - and then asks me for "loans" - in fairness, after many reminders and months later, he pays back some of them - I told him to write down all his expenses like I do, so I can help him making the money last and even saving, but he doesn't, so I will not lend him any).

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