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Olddaddy

A boyfriend?

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14 hours ago, caeron said:

My partner doesn't care that I hire, as long as it isn't in the house. She knew I was gay when I married her. But, she's my best friend, and I'd be lost without her. All relationships are compromise, that was part of ours.  We're coming up on 30 years, so it works for us.

this is the key for intimate “partner” relationships- an agreement between two people (or more) based on expectations on how needs will be met from inside & outside the relationship.  The agreement absolutely doesn’t need to fit into any predetermined ideas/rules of what an intimate relationship should look like. And it doesn’t need to be labeled with a standard open or closed either.  

I have a long-term western gay relationship which has evolved over time.  We love each other & still have great sex.  But, I don’t think that one person can meet all of my needs. That’s where hiring and travel comes in - I need that freedom, excitement, & different sex partners without any emotional attachments. I need that freedom a couple times a year and I’m satisfied.  This has been the agreement w my partner since the beginning and that works for us.  

As for relationships with garotos or moneyboys - I don’t see why that couldn’t work.  As long as there is an agreement and both are satisfied.  The sex always fades in long term relationships (it takes work and effort to keep ours going, but we do it) and there will either be some real affection/love that develops, or the relationship will end.  Same as any other sort of intimate relationship.

As @caeronsays above - it’s always a compromise of some sort.

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1 hour ago, Olddaddy said:

Someone to love?

I met a old guy on my last trip to Pattaya,76yo and lived with his 4 dogs ,he didn't have any family or wanted a lover at his age , so do you really need someone to love?

I think you'd first have to have loved someone in order to answer that question.

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1 hour ago, Olddaddy said:

Someone to love?

I met a old guy on my last trip to Pattaya,76yo and lived with his 4 dogs ,he didn't have any family or wanted a lover at his age , so do you really need someone to love?

It sounds like for your friend, the someone to love is his dogs. I know that is the case with some of my friends. Pets can really be family for some.

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3 minutes ago, TotallyOz said:

It sounds like for your friend, the someone to love is his dogs. I know that is the case with some of my friends. Pets can really be family for some.

That's so true! 💙

 

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3 hours ago, khaolakguy said:

Your wallet is an indivisible part of who you are. Discussions about would someone love if you didn't have a wallet are as pointless as conversations about if you would be loved if didn't have a good heart(both physical and emotional) or a good character or attitude or personality or cock or education or outlook.............

I am a introvert and a loner.  I usually don't open up myself when meeting people.  But once people start finding about my wallet, they all want to attach to me, i.e., be my friends or boyfriends.  This rule never failed, never. 

Money is not the king to me, but it is to the vast majority of people in this world.

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7 hours ago, floridarob said:

Love and sex are 2 different things that some people think are the same.

exactly - and if you take that one step further and consider legally marrying someone, marriage is actually a business contract and has nothing do with love, although it’s almost always viewed through the context of love.  
If you think otherwise, see what happens when you get divorced and there’s no legal document (pre-nup) that governs the dissolution. It will be lawyers & courts determining how to divide assets according the governing laws of your country/state. Love won’t ever enter the discussion.  
nobody likes this discussion, but it’s 100% true. 

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6 hours ago, scott456 said:

But once people start finding about my wallet, they all want to attach to me, i.e., be my friends or boyfriends.  This rule never failed, never. 

then you should never let anyone know about your wallet. “money” conversations are not considered appropriate in the US and I’d think many other places unless there’s a need to know - w lawyers and accountants only.  the people I know w the most, are the ones you’d never suspect - as long as they remain out of the public eye. 
if we’re talking about garotos or moneyboys in developing countries, they think every gringo is rich. making an extra effort in those places to be seen as an average tourist is highly recommended for many reasons.

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9 minutes ago, Slvkguy said:

exactly - and if you take that one step further and consider legally marrying someone, marriage is actually a business contract and has nothing do with love, although it’s almost always viewed through the context of love.  
If you think otherwise, see what happens when you get divorced and there’s no legal document (pre-nup) that governs the dissolution. It will be lawyers & courts determining how to divide assets according the governing laws of your country/state. Love won’t ever enter the discussion.  
nobody likes this discussion, but it’s 100% true. 

Yes !!! And in some countries even if your Not married they can take half !

You only have to be together 2 years in a de facto relationship.

My Filipino boyfriend here in Australia wants to marry , he got offended when I suggested a pre nip with a lawyer ,😳

 

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I’ve heard that justification from several “boyfriends” when I was reluctant to open my wallet to pay for their latest present (clothes phones jewellery etc) I’ve not had a “boyfriend” for several years now but during a couple of more long term visits in the past to Pattaya the ones I had were more like longer term offs when I made regular payments every few days in return for their company in and out of bed. In my rented condo block there were  other gay farangs with the same arrangements with Boys, of course much younger than themselves.

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2 hours ago, Olddaddy said:

he got offended when I suggested a pre nip with a lawyer

that’s a big red flag.  he either doesn’t understand the implications or has another agenda (money, inheritance, citizenship elsewhere, etc)

 

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10 hours ago, floridarob said:

and talking about dogs, they are the most loyal love you can have, they don't care if you live in a mansion or under a bridge

true - why do you think Trump never had a dog ?  The dog would know 

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8 hours ago, Travellerdave said:

I’ve heard that justification from several “boyfriends” when I was reluctant to open my wallet to pay for their latest present (clothes phones jewellery etc) I’ve not had a “boyfriend” for several years now but during a couple of more long term visits in the past to Pattaya the ones I had were more like longer term offs when I made regular payments every few days in return for their company in and out of bed. In my rented condo block there were  other gay farangs with the same arrangements with Boys, of course much younger than themselves.

It's a barter they bring youth and beauty in return you gave financial support. 

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14 hours ago, Travellerdave said:

I’ve heard that justification from several “boyfriends” when I was reluctant to open my wallet to pay for their latest present (clothes phones jewellery etc) I’ve not had a “boyfriend” for several years now but during a couple of more long term visits in the past to Pattaya the ones I had were more like longer term offs when I made regular payments every few days in return for their company in and out of bed. In my rented condo block there were  other gay farangs with the same arrangements with Boys, of course much younger than themselves.

As Richard ..(forget his last name..Burke?)  ex owner  Street talk) use to say...If you want a boyfriend in Thailand..then Rent one !!!! Never buy !👍

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On 8/14/2022 at 10:07 PM, Vessey said:

I do have a boyfriend now, although I share him with a Swiss guy. When he is with me I am No. 1, when he is with Mr Switzerland he is No 1. Kinda works in an odd way. Fortunately we both holiday at different times with the lad, but I do kinda wonder who is his No 1 when neither of us are in town? 🤣

Could you give me his contact? I'll try to find out for you.

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Perhaps I am a cold person, but I've never fell in love with any money boy. I pay for sexual pleasure, that's all. I don't seek any companionship from money boys, mostly because we wouldn't have anything interesting (to me) to talk about.   If I am with a money boy in public, I won't tell people he is my boyfriend.  And I would forbid him to tell people we are boyfriends, simply because we are not.

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